Picture of Oliver Brennan

When I got out of the building, I felt unusually cold, even though it was still only mid-September. I guess the situation I was in sucked every warm feeling I had ever had out of me.

I pulled out my phone and dialed my brother's number.

"Yeah?" I heard Kyle's gruff voice on the other line, and just the sound of it made me lose it. My body started to tremble and quiet sobs escaped my lips.

"K-kyle," I hiccupped and tried to control my stupid emotions and body, but my effort was useless. I was ready to break down in the middle of a street in front of my ex's apartment. I would gladly leave and never come back again. I refused to fight for that place, just the imagination of staying there after what I saw made me sick. He could bring over a whole bunch of people now. I didn't care anymore.

"Ollie? Ollie, what's wrong? What happened? Why do you sound like you're crying?" Kyle was panicking, and I could hear really loud noises over the phone. He was probably running around the house and searching for clothes so he could get on the road as soon as possible. The last time I called in the middle of the night was when I was in high school five years ago. At that time, one of my friends got into a terrible accident and we needed help.

Kyle knew I wouldn't call this late unless it was an emergency situation.

"Can you-" I stuttered and took a deep breath. "Can you pick me up, please? I'm in front of Victor's. I need a place to crash at for few days," I whispered and the line became deadly silent.

Everyone in my family knew my opinion on cheating. And because I never needed to stay out of the apartment even if we had a big argument that led to us not talking for few days, there was only one thing that could happen to make me leave.

The conclusion was clear.

Victor cheated.

And Kyle realized it.

"That son of a bitch! I'm going to kill him!" he growled and slammed the door, the sound too loud for me to miss it.

"Just hurry up. I want to go home," I sobbed and hung up. I sat down on the stairs leading to the apartment building and waited.

***

I had been sitting there for like 10 minutes when I heard loud stomping and opening of the door. I turned around to look who was going out this late and was surprised to see Victor's boy. When he noticed me, he stopped and backed away, his face turning pale in the process.

I sighed exaggeratedly.

"I'm not going to beat you up, so just calm the fuck down and go away," I grumbled and turned my head back to face the road. Kyle should be here any minute.

"I'm sorry," he whispered after a few seconds and came near me.

I didn't look at him. I couldn't.

"Look. I know it's not your fault. You are just too naïve or stupid or whatever you want to call it and trusted Victor's every word, but right now...I can't talk to you normally. Even though I told you I won't beat you, I still want to do just that. You should probably leave. You don't have to feel bad. You didn't know. The only bad guy here is that damn bastard, so don't let it get to you," I said and then frowned.

"Why the hell am I even comforting you? I'm the one who just found out his boyfriend of two and a half years has been cheating on him for however long it has been happening. Go away," I cried out and put my head in my hands as a new wave of sobs came over me.

I was feeling so broken at the moment. It felt like there was a big black hole in my chest, and I couldn't fill it back up even if I tried. I wanted to scratch at that nonexistent hole and make the itching sensation disappear.

Instead of that, I clawed at my arms and tried to calm down. It wasn't working though. My breathing was getting shallow, and I started to see black and white spots in front of me. I was literally choking on my sobs, but I couldn't stop them, which made me cry even more.

It just hurt so much!

How could he do this to me?

How could Victor ruin us like this?

Was I not enough?

Was I too old?

Too ugly?

Too occupied?

Too...in love?

"What the hell did I do wrong to end up like this? I thought we were stable. I thought he loved me," I whispered and looked in front of me, blankly staring at nothing and letting the tears fall and sobs break free. One of the cars came to a stop right in front of me, and I knew it was my brother even without seeing what type of car it was. I tried to stand up to make it easier for him, but it was impossible. My body just gave up. I fell back on my ass and whined at the sudden pain.

"Oliver!" Kyle yelled and run to me, leaving the car door opened.

Idiot.

Someone could easily steal it.

"I-I can't stand," I hiccupped, and he took me in his arms.

"It's going to be ok, baby bro; everything's going to be ok," he whispered and took me to the back seat of the car. Before he managed to put me in, I blacked out.

***

"I shouldn't have taken you with us. I thought you were his friend or something but you..." Kyle's voice trailed off, full of contempt and anger.

I grumbled, annoyed at the voice that woke me up from my sweet dreamless sleep.

"Shut up, Kyle. Someone wants to sleep!" I hissed at him and put the blanket over my head. It was warm and cozy. One would fall back into deep slumber unless some pest didn't decide to be annoying.

"Sorry Oli, I didn't mean to," he whispered as gently as he could, being my rugged mean brother.

I frowned and took the blanket off, sitting up and looking at him confused.

"Why are you being so nice? Never mind that. What am I doing in your house anyway?" I sat up and looked around the room. When my eyes stopped at the small boy sitting at the chair near the door, my world crumbled and reality hit me.

"Oh," I whispered and I could feel my eyes filling with the tears yet again, "I almost forgot." I smiled sadly and tried to wipe the tears off. It was, of course, futile effort as my eyes decided to cause a flood.

"Ollie, calm down. You had a bad fever when I picked you up. The doctor said it was from the stress and all the crying. You need to rest and relax."

Doctor?

"How l-long was I out?" I asked, breathing deeply to calm at least a bit.

"Almost 14 hours," he answered. I looked at him with shock. Fourteen hours? That's impossible!

"No way." I felt my eyes getting even wetter and Kyle whined.

"Oliver! You have to at least try!"

"I can't! You can't even imagine how I am feeling right now! My fucking boyfriend betrayed me in the worst way possible! I feel like there's this huge fucking hole in my chest," I motioned over the middle side of my upper body, "and it hurts like hell! You can't even imagine how much I want to scratch my chest till it's bleeding! Every pain would be better than the one I'm feeling right now!"

I knew I was exaggerating, but I couldn't help myself. It was just too fresh. I couldn't stop thinking about the reasons why he decided to find someone else. I thought we were happy. I thought we loved each other. He never hinted on anything that could force him to do this.

And yet, he did.

I turned at the boy that was still sitting on the chair, looking at his knees, his whole posture extremely tense.

"Why are you here?" I asked, and his head shot up, his eyes filling with tears as well.

I didn't know why. I probably shouldn't have been feeling this way towards him. It was too soon. All I wanted to do was to yell at him and punch him in the face. But right now, I felt some kind of affinity.

I guess it was because of our similar situations. Or maybe because he looked as pitiful as me.

Or maybe, just maybe, it was because we were both broken, beyond repair and the one at fault was the same man, Victor himself.

"What's your name?" I sighed and lied down, looking at the ceiling.

"Charlie," he whispered and right after that, the room filled the sound of soft sobs.