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Chapter 14 – "Never Getting Back Together"

The Last Time – Taylor Swift ft. Gary Lightbody

"So boys, who are we going to the prom with?"

Jake – who was lying down near the foot of the bed, throwing a basketball aimlessly into the air and catching it – looked down at me, "I'm thinking Sandra Brighton from our American History class." He smirked, "But I'm keeping Trisha from Math and Deena from Art on my list of potentials."

Russo, seated near Jake's head, rolled his eyes at Jake's player mentality and rested them on me, "I'm taking-"

"Lucy Lui?" Jake interjected.

"That's racist, Jake." He commented, rolling his eyes once more before shifting his gaze back to me, "I'm thinking of taking Harriett."

Jake shifted to meet his eyes – or more so the side of his head, "Volley-ball, man eater Harriett?"

"Well, when you put it like that..."

I huffed, "Dude, she's going to eat you alive."

He smirked, "Then I'm definitely taking her."

I snorted and threw a pillow playfully in his direction, "You slut!"

He caught it and grinned, placing it in his lap, "I'm just trying to lose the V-card like any other self-respecting male."

Jake hooted, "I say go for it dude. Your handsome, cute, you've got these amazing eyes."

"Is that an Asian joke?" Russo quipped.

Jake waited a beat. "Yes." He said. "But a wholesome one."

Russo snorted and Jake's eyes turned to me next. "So, what are you and Spence doing for Prom?"

I shrugged, "I have no idea. I'm all out of romantic, overly cheesy date ideas."

"Maybe if you screwed up less often then you'd still have some left in the bank." Russo commented to the agreement of Jake.

"It's not my fault I'm an idiot." I retorted, "Blame the questionable parental skills of my parents and the failing educational system."

Russo blinked, "I'm a straight A student."

Jake huffed animatedly, "Calm your shit Russo, ain't everyone got Asian brain like you."

Russo crashed head first into the pillow, "Why am I friends with you people?" he said, sounding muffled against it.

"Knock-knock?" a voice called from outside my door, pushing it in a bit when I said they could come in. Mom's head – brunette bangs in all – poked its way in with a little smile plastered on her face, "Hey boys." She hummed. Both the boys looked over to her and offered their pleasantries while I simply waited for her to continue, "Ethan, your father and I are going out for a hot night on the town."

"It's five in the afternoon."

"Sorry for getting old." She commented, "We won't be back for a couple of hours so pizza is in the fridge, our numbers are on the coffee table and no pot."

My eyes slightly widened, "We don't smoke pot, mom."

She blinked and looked around the room, "Really?" she questioned, "According to Parent Weekly, either you're smoking pot or doing something called circle jerking?"

Russo dry heaved the same time Jake snickered. "Mom!" I blasted. "We're good, you can stop embarrassing me now."

She giggled, "Okay honey. I didn't mean to embarrass you. Have a nice night boys." With that she closed the door.

Jake sat up with an amused glint in his eyes, "Why haven't we circle jerked before?" he mocked at my expense, "I mean, we're all attractive here, aren't we?"

"That's so Ethan, Jake." Russo joked.

My eyes turned to him and narrowed, "Were you making fun of me because I'm gay?

"Not cool, dude." Jake chided.

Russ growled, "Ooooh, so it's okay to make fun of me because I'm Asian but I can't make fun of you because you're gay? I'm in no way a stereotypical Asian guy!" I threw the next pillow and he caught it excellently. Russo threw the pillow back at me and sat down Indian style in the bed with a deep set pout, "That doesn't mean anything."

"Please," I snorted, "you're a pack of Ramen noodles away from starring in your own anime."

"Dick heads..." he mumbled and turned around to pick up a controller off of the floor. Jake followed suit and they started where they left off with a game of Mario Kart.

I sighed. I didn't have the strength to play games after another day of finals and I was feeling a serious case of missing Spencer. The moron told me not to bother him today since he's studying for his last set of finals tomorrow. I sighed again – a little louder this time and caught the attention of Jake.

"Dude, if you're missing your other half so badly, why not call his ass or surprise him or something?"

"He'd kill me if I bothered him right now."

Jake shrugged his shoulders. "He wouldn't if you gave him the D."

Russo snickered and briefly peered back at me before turning his attention back to the game. I scoffed and readjusted myself on the backboard, "You guys know how Spence gets during exams. The kid basically locks himself in his room the entire week just to prepare."

"And yet he still gets Bs." Jake joked but it came out harsher than he probably intended it to.

"Watch it." I warned, a little too sharply. Jake didn't turn around but I could see enough of the side of his face to know that he was caught off guard by it. It got silent for a few minutes before I decided to speak up, "Sorry, dude. That came out a little rougher than I wanted it to."

He took a moment before his tense shoulders finally relaxed, "It's all good, bro. I know how hard Spence works. I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay, dude." I chuckled, "No need for an explanation. If Spence was here you'd be grass though."

"Sure." He murmured with a smirk as playful as his tone.

An hour had passed and the boys had continuously rotated games. They had offered me a controller a few times but each time I declined and opted being a depressed spectator. I hadn't spoken to Spence since school ended and I was kind of getting antsy to see him again.

I huffed loudly again and Russo growled, "Ethan, do you want to go out and do something because this is the billionth time your ass has either sighed, huffed, moaned or groaned." He chided, "I'm going to explode if any more sounds come from your mouth!"

"Sheesh." I mumbled playfully, chuckling a bit under my breath at the intense squinted (racist?) glare of Russ, "Sorry for missing my boyfriend."

"This honeymoon phase you're in is irritating; especially to me since I don't have anyone to be in a honeymoon phase with." He blurted and pointed directly at the door, "Dismissed."

I snorted and slumped back on the bed, "This is my room so you can't kick me out."

"I swear I'll start singing K-pop songs if you don't."

"Oh so now you're Thai."

He gave me a strangled, gaping look, "K-pop is Korea-" He stopped and sighed, "You know what, just get up and go out. Take a breather to get Spence off of your mind and come back so I could kick your ass in BO."

Jake - who was taking advantage of Russo's tirade and killed him multiple times – looked back and nodded, "Yeah, dude. Just go smell some roses or whatever manly gay guys do."

I stopped myself from hurling profanities at him, huffed and got up from the bed and took the dangerous chance of looking myself in the mirror. With my hair still shaped like the cool side of my pillow, I shrugged and exited the room and lazily pulled myself downstairs into the living room where Josh sat uncharacteristically stationed on the couch with one leg over the chair's uncovered arm.

I huffed and took the chance of sitting next to him. His face was twisted in a deep scowl and his hands were nervously clamped together. "You know," I exhaled once I sat, "for someone who is sitting in such a comfy position, you couldn't look any tenser."

He rolled his eyes, flipping through random channels, "I'm not in the mood for sibling banter, Ethan."

I swallowed and relaxed in my position, repositioning myself a couple times before just opting to mimic Josh and throw my leg over the edge of the couch.

"Mom said not to do that." He remarked, barely audible and lazier than I've ever heard him.

I shrugged back with just as much enthusiasm, "You're doing it so..."

"I'm older."

"So?"

"I can do what I want."

"You're eighteen, dude."

"And according to Idaho, that makes me a legal, consenting adult."

I rolled my eyes and took the chance of just asking him, "I'm guessing you're not taking the break-up well."

"She dumped me." He simply said, adding a little spite-filled chuckle when the last syllable rolled off his tongue.

"I know how that feels." I responded honestly, "But you'll get over it and find someone special."

He looked over – sadness and the redness brought on from either the tears or the alcohol still cursing his bright eyes, "You mean like you and Spence?"

I was hesitant to smile. I didn't know if that was genuine reply or a spiteful retort; so, I simply nodded stiffly.

He chuckled, "I didn't mean to offend you, bro. I admire your dynamic with him." he held out one of his hands in my direction as if he was presenting me to a crowd, "Ethan – the most extroverted person I know and," he placed the other on top of it and intertwined them, "Spencer – the very definition of an Introvert." He snickered, "Ying and Yang, Day and Night, Winter-Summer; and yet, somehow, you work so well together." He gagged, "It's sickening."

"How long are you going to be like this?"

He shrugged, "Give it a week or six. I'll be back up on my feet again. Until I get knocked down and I'm a broken mess again."

"God," I mumbled, "Will you stop being such a girl about this. If you love her, go and get her back." I growled.

Josh raised a brow before chuckling softly, "If Spencer dumped you what would you do?"

"I would fight for him."

"What if he said he wanted nothing to do with you?"

"I'd sing the Taylor Swift crap that he loves so damn much to him."

"If he started dating again?"

"I'd wait for him."

"If he got married?"

"I'd be happy."

He looked taken back and narrowed his eyes, "Why?"

"Because he'd be marrying me because I fought for him instead of sulking on a couch like a girl."

"You're rather sexist today."

"Sorry," I spat back, "I turn into a 20h century bigot when I see people making stupid decisions." I retorted. "You're not the couch potato of this family Josh; go to Shannon's damn door and tell her you want her pretty ass back before it's too late to."

He blinked blankly, "When did you get so aggressive?"

"When Spencer caught off sex so he could study and I have all this excess energy that I guess coverts itself into angry material or something."

His eyes narrowed; "You're failing Bio, aren't you?" he deadpanned.

"My poor grades aren't the topic here; it's your pussy attitude. Now, go and get her back."

He sighed and looked around him – possibly for some sorry excuse not to man up. Once he couldn't find anything, he huffed loudly, dragging his leg off the arm of the chair and standing up, "I'll think about it." was all he said – much to my annoyance – and stalked out of the room, leaving a trail of depression and chips behind him.

I shook my head and stood. "All of this counseling has got me hungry..." I mumbled to myself and pranced (literally) to the kitchen. Once there, I placed a hand on my hip and looked around. "Cereal?" I frowned, "No milk." "Pizza?" I thought, "Too long." I growled, "Damn it."

Where is Spencer when you actually need him? Oh yeah. Studying. I growled and stomped out of the kitchen, grabbed my keys and dog tag with our initials off of the table near the door and left to get a burger; and, after an altercation with some college dude who thought that he was in front of me on the line, I finally ate and sat in the park.

I sat there, playing with my thumbs – an action I always did when I was nervous and biting my lip, as I watched people walk past – laughing – talking –holding hands. It was torture.

I felt someone sit next to me on the wooden bench but paid no mind. Not until he spoke. "Congratulations."

My jaw clenched, "On?" I hissed.

"Take your pick." Austin mumbled, "Getting nominated for Junior Prom King and expertly hiding the truth from your beloved boyfriend."

My heart accelerated in my chest and my fist balled. Slowly, my stare – iced and stoned – drifted to him. His pair wore a simple smile – nothing cocky or brash and that made me angrier. "You aren't allowed to look at me like that." I hissed, "Not anymore."

"Sorry." he muttered and looked down, letting his eyes escape mine, "For all of this. I didn't mean to get you mix up in my insecurities or Piper in this mess either."

"Aussie, you wanted me to pretend like I was dating your sister and not you!" I screeched, completely unaware of the volume or might of my voice until birds flushed out of several tress and it echoed for miles. Austin cringed a little at it and sunk down a little, looking embarrassed at all the attention we were now receiving. I, on the other hand, was not so easily shaken. Not anymore. "I liked you, Austin; all you did was use me."

"My parents know."

"A few months and a relationship too late."

He sighed and finally reverted his gaze to me, "They knew before the dinner at the Haynes' place; which, can I add, you were an ass for acting so coldly to Piper at. She did lose her boyfriend because of all of this as well."

"What did either of you expect?" I laughed dryly, "You cheated on me with your ex girlfriend and Piper covered for you for weeks!"

"Can you-" he stopped once he noticed how loud he was. He shrank back into his seat again, "...can you stop being so loud. This isn't front page news."

"No." I blurted, standing to my feet and in front of him, "I was scared back then after the Halloween thing with Spence. I hid myself because I was afraid of what society would think of me because of what you said they would do to us." I shook my head, "But not anymore. I'm Ethan Littman; I'm date dudes, I'm in love and we are never ever getting back together." I was about to stalk away but turned to looked at him. I grabbed him by his downcast head and cupped his face to make him look into my eyes, "and if you ever make a move on what's mine again – I'll break your damn neck." I dropped it and straightened myself out.

I breathed out shakily, walking away with just the dim, retreating rays of sun lighting the path since the street lights were yet to guide me. At first, my steps were heavy; shaking the foundation of the stoned walkway until leisurely and gradually they slowed and became lighter and lighter and lighter until they were no heavier than a bird's feather forcefully gliding on a path in the direction of the wind.

My heart felt the same way. It sat gently in my chest; lightly beating. When I finally got in my car, I just sat there. Just staring...

Breathing.

Smiling.

When I got home and explained everything to the boys, all they could do was stare in awe and look at one another in shock.

"You had a thing with the Austin kid and not his hot sister?" Jake asked with his mouth still wide enough to catch flies.

Russo, who wore a similar stare swallowed, "And you told him to that you were never ever getting back together with him?"

I sighed, sitting on the ground near their feet, "I know, it corny and shocking and for some reason sounds like a Taylor Swift future break-up song - I'm caling it now - but it's true."

"Why didn't we know you two were dating?" Jake asked, sounding genuinely offended.

Russo nodded, "Yeah. We're your best friends;" he paused, "After Spencer, that is and we should've known what was going on." He stopped again and narrowed his eyes, "Did Spencer know?"

I shivered at the question, "Spence doesn't know anything." I muttered, "I didn't tell anyone because Austin was still in the closet and I was confused since me and Spence kissed. So...I experimented with Austin. He wanted me to fulfill his sexual appetite and I was just trying to figure out if it was a phase or whatever. He wanted me to pretend that I was dating his sister, Piper so I could stay over sometimes in his room since his parents didn't want me to pop their daughter's cherry." I ran my hands through my hair, "He got so worked up sometimes when we would almost get caught that it started to play with my head and I got scared too."

Both of them leaned in, "So what happen?" Jake asked.

I shrugged, "What always happens. I started to like him and thought that we could tell his parents about us; but, he got scared and cheated on me with one of his ex girlfriends to see if he could go back to girls. After three weeks, he told me he cheated on me and I dumped him. Piper's boyfriend found out she was "dating" me and dumped her. Austin has been trying to get back with me basically ever since then and has even gone as far as trying to take Spence away."

Russo's eyes were wide again, "That's crazy."

I chuckled, half bitter – half genuinely happy, "I'm glad it happened. If I didn't go through all of that, I probably would have still been in some secret relationship with him and not Spencer – who I always had feelings for." I smiled, "It was fate."

"But wasn't Spence the same way?" Jake questioned and I raised a confused brow. He shrugged and shuffled to the floor with Russo not far behind him, "I mean, Spence didn't want to tell his parents for a long while."

I nodded, "I know but by that time, I was too deeply in love with him to ever give him up and Spencer wouldn't ever cheat on me. Plus, all of you knew that we were going to get together sooner or later."

"So all that's left is to tell Spence."

I swallowed and shivered even at the thought of telling him, "I don't think it's a great idea to. Spencer erupts like volcano when I do silly stupid things like misplace a book or spill coffee on his bed sheet or if I pull out too late and get sper-"

"Too much, too much, toooo much info dude!" Russo yelled, clamping his ears down with his hands.

I rolled my eyes, "My point is," I continued, playfully staring at him, "If he finds out about this he won't just erupt – he'll explode."

Jake leaned against the bed and shrugged again, "He's not going to break up over it."

I scowled, "How do you know that?"

"Believe it or not E but Spencer isn't in a relationship with you because you're a deep thinker, smart or because of your amazing personal hygiene. He's in love with you so he puts up with all of that."

"I'm having trouble sorting out if that was a compliment or an insult."

Russo smiled, "My point exactly. You have the right dose of genuine idiocy, honest to a fault clumsiness, innocence, scumbag-douchebagery and romance that's' perfect for someone who is intelligent, precocious, annoyingly witty and let's face it, boring as Spencer. He needs you to help him get his feet off the ground so he's not so uptight all the time just like you need him to smack you back to earth when you get ahead of yourself."