To see around

scattered sadness, pretentious happiness

Broken hearts and unending loneliness

Here I stand, conflicted

Different personalities resulting in thousands judgments

But the basic feelings reside

The masks break and trials fail

But ignorance and egocentric succeeds and prevails

Understanding be a curse

Hope and care leaves helplessness and misery

To be kind is suppressed

In fears of being oppressed

Closing my eyes

I feel the emptiness

the loneliness and helplessness

If expressed, I am told to stop

in hopes that I won't be hurt at all

Even though with desires to help

My hands are chained by those who care

My heart breaks to see them suffer

They're everywhere around us

In the crowd laughing, but inside lies the loneliness

Smiling while emptying the pain that resides

With friends but without them

Having a true friend but afraid of trusting them

Wanting someone to be by their side forever

But afraid of being left out all over again

My heart swells as I smile

But their pain and concern resides in my eyes

I want to help but I am chained

When will this cycle break

Of taking advantage of the kind

Of being merciless with who trusted you blind

Of leaving the helpful helpless

Of breaking the trust of your own true friends

Because with that I am chained

I can't help anyone and everyone

For those who care, worry about me

But then again, I try to explain myself

If who I want to help would take advantage of me

Then its best left to be with the ones I got besides me

Even if their suffering shall ache my heart

This world is cruel. It will break your heart.

( the last part, after "when will this cycle break" I wrote it just now. So it might not vibe with the above one i guess?)

I wrote this poem out of my desire to help someone. But afraid of being judged too. There are people whom you should stay away from. And then there are people who you could interact but its better to stay away as 'bad company'. To see one of them so lonely hurts me. Even with different personalities, we all feel the same emotions don't we? Then why the judgmental nature? that's what I meant by the line "Different personalities resulting in thousand judgements, but the basic feeling resides."

So yeah, that's where this poem got originated from. High school sadness seen from my eyes of those who pretend that they're happy and nothing is wrong and are all 'cool dude'

Also, if you guys wanna title this poem, feel free.