because if dark philosophy is correct and a human being is born into a constant state of pain due to our consciousness that means that this discontent, this yearning begins around the age of two. this is a truism, coined by society as a child's terrible twos. a mind that has just gained consciousness of themselves and awareness of their own wants and needs, the sudden gain in ability to choose right over wrong. it's our introduction to our good and our evil.

these children now face the prohibiting nature of language, being incapable to communicate these needs and new found sense of self to their mothers.

i feel an empathy for this stage in life, for i too feel a loss of satisfaction due to my inability to truly communicate.

we deem the english language a blessing and it can be but really, you can't dilute your experiences into 26 letters and 10 numbers like some sort of internal coding but instead of codes and equations and pixels, we have letters and numbers and words. words like euphoria and despair, words like love and hate, bliss and agony, but they all seem so small when used to describe this absurd feeling that i feel inside