《Still in my heart》Denying the obvious
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Taekwang and Soo Young sit on the bench near the school field.
"Is something happened yesterday?" asks Soo Young
"Aniyo. " answers Taekwang
" Liars! Something did happened. Ya! You think that I'm stupid?"
Taekwang doesn't say anything.
"Araso. Don't tell me if you doesn't want it. Ah cem. Why you asked me to come here? I thought that rooftop is your things. It's more cozy there and less cold"
"It just.. I don't want Eunbi to find me."
"Ah.. you're avoiding her. But don't you think that you're too confident, I don't think she's looking for you. You know, she has better things to do."
"Shut up!"
"Haha.. mianhe.. I'm just joking. This place is also nice. It could becomes our place." Soo Young smiles and continues, "And just like I said yesterday on the phone, I will help you."
"How? I tried before but I failed miserably."
"Actually I don't know. Hahaha" says Soo Young while hide her face
"Ya! Jugule?!" protest Taekwang
"Mianhae. But nevertheless I said I'll help you so I will. So.. hmmm.. ahh.. try to contact her less. If you need someone, don't call her but call me." says Soo Young
She continues, "You know, not only I'm pretty but I can be reliable. Hehe"
"Aigoo.. Jeju really makes you crazy. Ya! You need to see the mirror first before saying that you pretty." jokes Taekwang
"Ya ya! Look at me." She use her hand to makes an aegyo gesture and says with an aegyo voice, "oppa.. When oppa said I'm not pretty, it makes me sad. Very very sad."
Taekwang see her with a disgusting face. He rumbles her hair and says, "stop it!"
"Wae? I'm cute right?" she continues teasing him with her aegyo.
Taekwang doesn't said anything, he just leave her.
"Ya! Taekwang oppaaaa.. wait for me.!" She stand up and chase him.
Taekwang push her when she's nearby and doing an aegyo towards him. They're just like two kids playing. They don't notice that someone see them from the rooftop.
Eunbi who's looking for Taekwang went to the rooftop but she couldn't find him. She looks around the rooftop but there's no Taekwang. She holds the handrails and looks at the field and she see them laughing. Eunbi bows her head and sighed. She mumbles, "I should be happy. I keep telling him that I always feel sorry for him because I can't return his feelings but why.. but why I can't be happy right now."
***
Eunbi lays down on her bed. She sees the big teddy bear from Yi Ahn. She takes a deep breath and says, "I have him. I have han yi ahn now. A guy that I like."
Suddenly a text message comes.
It's Yi Ahn's.
"Where are you now?" -Yi Ahn-
"Home. Wae?" -Eunbi-
"Can I see you?" -Yi Ahn-
"Sure. Where?" -Eunbi-
"Park. I'll be arrive around seven" -Yi Ahn-
"Araso. See you there" -Eunbi-
Eunbi gets up from her bed and takes her bag. She goes to the park to meet Yi Ahn. She waits for few minutes and see him. She waves at her and smile.
"Hi. Did I make you wait?" Says Yi Ahn
"Aniyo. Did you finished your training?" Says Eun bi
"Ne! Have you eat? Do you want to eat ramen?"
"Sure. I have a space for ramen in my tummy."
They walk to the convenience store and buy some ramen.
"Wuahh it's been awhile." Says Yi Ahn
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"masitge deuseyo." says Eun bi
"I'm happy that you are back Eunbi-ah. I never knew that I can eat ramen with you. Eun byul never eat ramen after 7pm. She always said that it will make her face bloated."
"How's your training?" Says Eunbi, she tries to divert their conversations. Just for today, she doesn't want to hear about her sister from him.
"It's good. The competition is getting closer. It makes me nervous."
"I know you can do it."
"You will come to the competition right?"
"Ne."
"Yaksok?"
"Yaksok."
They're finished their ramen and went to their own home. Eunbi try to sleep but she can't. She close her eyes but her minds keep remind her of Taekwang and Soo Young giggling face. She gets up and open her study books. 'Maybe this will help' says her.
After so much struggling, she finally sleep in her desk around 3 am.
She wakes up with unwell feeling. She has a headache because lack of sleep. Her mom is concerned but Eunbi is insisting to go to school.
At the school, she try her best to hide her sickness. She barely eat her foods. She feels nauseous when she bites her food. Shijin and Song Joo haven't notice her sickness. They're busy with their study. They're preparing for next week exam.
She thinks her act can fool everyone but she's wrong. Taekwang notice her weird acts. He wants to ask her but Soo Young forbid him.
After school, she goes directly to her house. Her mom says that she shouldn't come to the shop. She wants Eunbi to takes a rest.
Meanwhile Taekwang follow her from behind because he still feels so concerned. When he starts to walk behind her, Soo Young asks
"Where are you going?"
"Home."
"Don't you have an English course today!"
"Ah majayo! I'm going to the course place."
"But that's the wrong way. I'm going to the same place. Let's go together."
"Hmmm.. I need to buy something first. You should go first."
Soo Young sighs and says "you're going to follow her right?"
"Ne" says Taekwang in weak voice
"Ya! Don't do it!"
"She looks so sick. I am afraid something will happen. Her sister is not here and her mom is in the shop. I just want to make sure, she's okay and arrive safely in her house."
Soo Young hold Taekwang arm and says, "please don't go."
Taekwang see her and look to Eunbi's direction. He push Soo Young's hand and says. "Mianhae. I'll meet you at the courses place okay"
He leaves Soo Young and run towards Eunbi. Soo Young sees him and she frowned.
"Who am I kidding? He never even looks at me. I think I am also an idiot. Waiting for the impossible to happen." sighed Soo Young.
Taekwang found Eunbi who's walking slowly. He follows her from behind. Not too close so she won't notice. Suddenly she's collapsing and Taekwang run before she hits the ground.
"Ya! Go Eunbi! Eunbi-ah!"
***
At the hospital, Eunbi gains conscious and see her mom and Taekwang by her side.
"Eomma..Gong Tae Kwang" says her in weak voice
"Eunbi-ah. Gwenchana?" says her mom
"Gwenchana. Just a little dizzy."
"You were collapsed and your friend brings you here. I am so panicked when they informed me. You should told me Eunbi-ah" says her mom
"Mianhae yo eomma"
"At least you awake. I will bring some water for you and your friend" says her mom and she walk out from the room.
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Taekwang looks at her with concerned face.
"Ya! You.. why don't you ask shijin or song joo to accompany home? If I wasn't there.." says Taekwang
"Gomawo Gong Tae Kwang." says Eunbi with smile in her face
"Gwenchana?"says Taekwang
"Gwenchana. I'm really fine."
"Thank god. I almost have a heart attack. You really..."
"Mianhae.."
"Aigoo.."
"Gong Tae Kwang.. are you done avoiding me?"
"Hah?! I'm not avoiding you."
"Keojitmal! I know I shouldn't said this but can you please stop doing that. I don't like when you're not around."
"..." Taekwang can't say anything
"I can tell you everything and even the words that I can't tell people about it. I thought few months away from all of you can makes me more brave to said what inside my mind but in the end I'm still lee eunbi."
Taekwang smiles and says, "so what that you are lee eunbi or go eunbi, you can be anything that you want in front of me. I don't care. All I care is you're smiling and happy. You are happy right? Did Han Yi Ahn treated you okay?"
"Honestly.. I don't know. I think maybe because I miss my sister."
"You know. Even though I hate him with all my guts but you should tell him what inside your head. He's a good guy but he just doesn't know you yet."
"Gomawo Gong Tae Kwang."
"Ya ya!! Don't tell him I said that. Okay?"
"Hehe.. araso. Just stop ignoring me."
"Araso."
They smile at each other and not long after, Han Yi Ahn comes. He sees Taekwang and Eunbi. His anger start to boiled. Taekwang realize that his presence is not welcome. Taekwang said goodbye to Eunbi and then he leaves them.
"Gwenchana?" asks Yi Ahn
"Gwenchana" Eunbi anwers with weak smile
"Taekwang text me that you're in hospital."
"He what? He tell you that I'm here?" Eunbi shocked heard what just Yi Ahn said
"Ne. I also didn't believe it was him at first."
Eunbi smiles brightly.
"Ah cem, I already told Eunbyul and she's shocked."
"You shouldn't tell her. I don't want to make her worry."
"Ah Mianhae. I will tell Eunbyul that she doesn't need to worry. Should I call her right now? Hmm.. she probably in her class."
"Enough!"
"Eunbi?"
"Stop it! Stop talking about unnie! It's been a month since we're together but it's always unnie that you're talking about."
"Eunbi-ah.. Mianhae.. I thought that you want to hear about her."
"I do but not all the time. It makes me wonder, do you really like me?"
"Don't be silly. Of course I like you."
"Keojitmal."
Yi Ahn moves his hand and hold Eunbi hand and says, "I like you Go Eunbi. How can I'm not liking you? You're nice and kind girl. I don't like when you're with other guys. I even get really jealous when you're with Taekwang. It means that I really really like you."
Eunbi push his hand gently and says, "ani.. you likes Eunbyul. You're not jealous because of someone get close to me, it's because I remind you of Eunbyul and you don't like guys hitting on her. I may look like her but I'm not her. She's far more cool than me. Don't you see?"
"It's not true. I do like you. I'll proof it. I'm sorry that I talk about her but I'll make it up to you."
Eunbi sighs and says, "You like my sister more than ten years and suddenly I come around. In the nickel of time, you decide that you like me more than her. But is it true? Is it me that you're like or me who look like your first love but not as cold as she is. You like the idea of her inside me. you know how I feel, I gave you back the medal because I accept your feeling but I don't think you truly moved on from my sister."
Yi Ahn is silent, he know deep down some of her words are true but he doesn't want to lose her either. He opens his mouth and says, "Eunbi-ah.."
"Let's take time to think about our truly feelings. Okay?"
Han yi ahn nods.
***
The next morning, Taekwang goes to hospital to see Eunbi. He promises to meet her before she checks out from the hospital. However when he arrives, someone call his name.
"Gong Taekwang!" Says Soo Young
"Ya. Soo young, why are you here?" Ask him back
"I am with my sister. She has an appointment for chemotherapeutic and how about you?"
There's a little girl beside Soo Young. She looks shy and pale.
"Annyeong. You must be Ji Young right? Wow you're so tall right now. You used to be really small"
The little girl smile and says, "annyeong haseyo Oppa.. you still remember me?"
"Of course, you used to follow me when I was playing at your house."
The little girl giggles after hearing what Taekwang said.
"So what are you doing here?" Asks Soo Young one more time
"I want to see Eunbi"
"Ya! You will jeopardize our plan."
"I promise her not to avoid her anymore. She knew by the way." says Taekwang while smiling
"Ya! Do you really like it? Ani! I won't allowed it. You will coming to me. You will accompany me and Ji Young."
She pulls his arm but Taekwang protest, "Ya!"
Ji Young then hold his hand and says, "oppa.. will you come with us? Pleaseeee.." she said with a puppy face.
"Please Taekwang.." begs Soo Young
"Araso. I do anything to make my little Ji young happy."
Ji young smiles at him and they walk hand in hand. Soo young smiles at them.
Ji young enter the chemotherapeutic room while Soo Young and Taekwang wait outside.
"Does she has to do this every month?" asks Taekwang
Soo Young nods and didn't said anything
"Are you okay?" Ask him again
"Ani." She starts to cry.
"Soo young-ah"
"Mianhae.." she wipes her tears and says, "it's hurtful to see it. She just 8 years old. She always look cheerful but I know inside she's suffering. Mianhae.. I don't want to cry, I try to hold it as long as I could but I just can't..."
"Gwenchana Soo Young-ah.. you can cry as long as you want with me" he push slowly her head towards his shoulder and let her cry.
After the chemotherapeutic, Taekwang says goodbye to them in the lobby. Ji Young walks first towards the door. Soo Young smiles at Taekwang and she hugs him.
"Gomawo Gong Taekwang"
Taekwang shocks and can't say anything or do anything. He just look at her and says, "ya..."
"Bye Taekwang. Don't forget to come tonight" she let go of her hand from Taekwang's back and waves goodbye to him.
When he makes sure that Soo Young and Ji Young are already gone, he goes directly to Eunbi's room but she's not there. The nurse said that they already check out.
Taekwang then goes to Eunbi's house and ask her to go out.
She comes out and meet Taekwang in front of her house.
"Are you feeling better?" says Taekwang
Eunbi nods.
"Have you eat?"
She didn't say anything just nods
"Are you mad?"
"Ani."
"Keojitmal."
She keep her mouth shut.
Taekwang continues says, "I came at the hospital in the morning but I saw Soo Young and her sister. They want me to accompany them. I can't say no to them."
"Why is she in the hospital?"
"Her sister is sick. But as soon as they finish, I run to your room but you already gone. Mianhae"
"Gwenchana."
"So will you forgive me?"
"There's nothing to forgive. I understand, she's you number one priority. Beside I'm nothing.."
Suddenly Taekwang puts his two hands on Eunbi's cheek. His face gets really close to her face. He says, "don't be ridiculous. You are my number one priority. Not her. It's you. Always you. Only you."
Eunbi looks shocked. Her heart beats really fast.
Taekwang realize what he was doing and let his hand go. And says, "mianhae"
There are silent between them for few minutes. They bow their head and none of them looks at to each other. Suddenly his phone rang and break the silence.
"Kkamjjag!" Says Taekwang. He pick up his phone and says "Yeoboseyo. Soo Young ah.. is there something wrong?..I'm with Eunbi.. wae?"
Soo Young starts to yell something at him, he puts away his cellphone from his ear and says,
"Ya! Your voice is really loud. I almost become deaf... Ne! Araso... ne.. ne.. see you soon okay. Bye."
He finished his call with Soo Young and says to Eunbi, "mianhae.. Soo young can't stop talking. She's really noisy sometimes."
"You are really close with her."
"Ne! Majayo. We know since kindergarten maybe that's why."
"Is she mad? I heard she yell at you."
"Ne. She doesn't like when I'm with you. But don't misunderstandings, it's not that she didn't like you. She just helping me."
"Helps you?"
"Ne! She help me to moved on from you. So you don't feel sorry all the time when you're with me. She thinks if I spend less time with you, it will help me to moved on. That's why I avoided you. I think in matter of time I will completely moved on so just wait a little bit okay."
Eunbi doesn't say anything. She doesn't know what to say. Her chest hurts so bad.
"Well. I think I should be going. You should rest. Don't forget to eat your medicine okay?"
"Are you going to her place?" says Eunbi in weak voice
"Ne! She invites me to eat with her family. She knows that I eat dinner alone all the time so she ask me to join her."
Taekwang smiles at Eunbi and continues saying, "you should go inside, it became colder in evening. I'm going. Bye"
Taekwang turn his body around and walks. One step..two steps.. three steps.. Eunbi run towards him. In short time she catches him and hugs him from behind.
"Don't go." She said
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