"So the bastard is dating something else?" My dad asked once again.

"Yes, dad. I've answered this too many times already.

"He's fucking strange." He leaned back on his chair, rubbing his chin with his hand. "I don't understand, it just doesn't add up."

"I left for a year, dad. I didn't tell him when I was coming back. I didn't expect for him to sit around for me. He's a grown man, he's twenty-nine, for God's sake. He deserve's to be with someone especially after the hell he lived through with me."

"I'm going to have to stop you right there, Eileen." Nicole walked into the living room just as the words left my mouth. "None of what happened was your fault."

"I know," I said exasperated. We were going to have this conversation once again, and Alex was about to pick me up. "I just mean that he really wouldn't have lived through so much if he hadn't met me, Nicole. You know that."

"Still. He knew your past, he knew you were running and he stayed regardless. He chose to stay. You didn't force him, he made the conscious decision to stay. Unless of course, he decided when you two were going at it," she turned to my dad who made a face. "Sorry, honey."

"You just always have to be so fucking straight forward," my dad muttered.

"Even if he is with another woman, dear, you two are forever connected. What you two lived through is unforgettable, the good, the bad. He'll always be a part of you, just like you'll always be a part of him. Don't lose his 'friendship' just to avoid feeling what you feel. It's not going away."

It was nice having a family for once. Nicole, was taking the place of a mother I could hardly remember. I knew she cared about me, and it filled me with joy. I could see the sincerity in her advice. The adoring look my dad gave her told me that he was just as happy that she was now in our lives.

"I need a baby brother or sister," I blurted out.

Nicole's eyes widened and my dad began coughing. I laughed.

"See, Nicole is not the only one that blurts out what she thinks," I said with a wink. "Now, I'm going to change, Alex should be here shortly so just tell him to wait."

After deliberating for a long time, I finally decided to wear jeans and a hoodie. I wasn't trying to impress anybody, right?

I did leave my hair down, though.

I knew this was likely pushing boundaries that we both needed to set, but perhaps that was why needed to talk alone. Even if we couldn't have a relationship, I still wanted him in my life. Regardless, he would always be a part of it due to my friendship with Lucas. We'd be stuck having to see each other so we would have to work things out.

I made my way back downstairs when I recognized his voice. They were talking very low, but still was able to make out some words.

"I do still have it," Alex said to my dad.

"Then what are you waiting for?"

"Have what?" I asked.

Alex looked up and ran his hand through his hair, which was messy in comparison to how he usually had it.

"We'll talk about it eventually," he replied. "Are you ready?"

"Yes. I'm ready."

"This is so not what I had in mind when you said breakfast," I said to Alex.

We were at an amusement park, in line for a roller coaster, a scary looking one too. We ate pizza for breakfast. I had the feeling that after getting on it I'd probably throw up the food I had eaten and Alex didn't even seem worried. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying my nerves way too much.

"Don't tell me you're scared, Eileen," he said with a smirk.

"I'm not," I said shrugging. "

"Right. You're terrified."

We wait a few more minutes before getting on the ride. It was fun, to say the least. It definitely clears your mind. The whole time Alex held my hand, and for just a moment I let myself think that it's just us.

That moment didn't last long though. I over hear a small conversation between Julia and him, but I don't let it get to me. He's not sweet to her, I notice. Not like he was with me.

Is it bad that it makes me feel good?

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I'm supposed to meet her for lunch."

"Oh," I said as we walk. "We can go, that's fine."

He shook his head.

"About last night, I probably shouldn't have done that..."

I cleared my throat. I should have known.

"I don't mean it like that," he said, noticing my reaction. "You deserve better than that, Eileen. I wasn't lying though, when I said I wanted you."

I nodded, biting my lip.

"You still do that," he said stopping us. He pulled my lip from under my teeth, gently running his finger over it.

"I'm ending it with her, Eileen."

"Wh-What?"

He smiled at me, now caressing my cheek.

"I'm ending it. I keep having to make up excuses as to why I can't sleep with her, and all I want to tell her is that I can't because she's not you."

"Do you still love me?" I asked.

He sighed, lowering his hand and my heart stopped beating.

"I don't want to say it until I'm done with her, Eileen. You deserve better than that, and when I say it, it'll be because I have no other compromise with another woman. Just look at me though, look at me in the eyes and there you'll see everything that I want to say to you. I can't hide it."

He cupped my face in his hands, placing a kiss on my forehead.

"Do you not see it?"

"I want to, Alex. But I'm scared you're just playing with me.. I wouldn't judge you if you moved on. I was gone for a long time."

"I thought I did, I thought I could. She was never meant to be more than one night, Eileen. She knows it too, but things just got carried away. Since you came back I haven't slept with her though, and I know that there's no reason why you should believe me, but I can't. Not when I'm thinking of you."

"I don't want you to hurt her."

"I don't either. She's a good woman, but like I said, she's not you."

I leaned into his touch. The familiarity of all of this was overwhelming. I missed him, everything about him. I didn't dare admit to myself that I still loved him though, not when he was still in a relationship with someone else. His rejection would hurt too much if I said the words out loud, even if I was dying to say them.

"Get your shit together, Moretti," I murmured with a smile.

"I will. Now, what you were wearing last night, did you choose that?"

I looked down embarrassed. Maybe he hadn't liked it.

"No, Nicole helped me choose it."

"You almost gave me a heart attack," he said with a smile. "I wanted to drag you somewhere private and do everything we haven't done in a year."

We spent most of the morning and afternoon together. It felt right, being with him. I wished he would kiss me, but I knew that it was better if we held off. Being together was already enough temptation and he was right, it would be horrible to do something like that to Julia.

He was also respecting me, despite how intense things had gotten between us. I appreciated that he thought highly enough about me to not cross that line.

Time always seemed to slip away when we were together, from the first day we had met. Neither of us wanted it to end, I could tell by the way he held on to my hand even as we sat inside his car. We talked for fifteen more minutes in the car, making conversation out of everything as long as I didn't have to walk away.

"When are you talking to her?" I finally asked.

"Tonight," he murmured squeezing my hand. "I'll talk to her tonight so that tomorrow things can be as they should."

"Be careful with her," I said, leaning on his shoulder.

I could sense the smile when he spoke. "I'm so lucky to have found you, Eileen. You deserve much more than what life has dealt you."

Sisters are a pain in the ass.

Especially when they believe they're right no matter how many times things are explained to them. My little sister, she was impulsive. Spit fire. Those aren't necessarily bad traits, but when you pair them up with being stubborn they are not a good combination.

Maybe she was spoiled, but the truth was that beneath that whole facade, she cared. I was the only family she had.

"You are with Julia!" Addie exclaimed. "You were basically dry humping Eileen in the middle of the club. Does she not have any respect for herself?"

"I'm going to have to stop you there," I said to her. "You don't talk about her like that."

"She fucking left you Alex. You spent the whole week after she left drunk. Does she not know that?"

"No, and she won't. There's no reason for you to put this guilt on her. She did what she had to do for herself, it wasn't because she wanted to hurt anyone."

"You were grieving too, Alex! She wasn't the only one that lost her daughter, because even if she wasn't your blood you loved that little girl."

It had been the same speech since the day Eileen came back. Addie couldn't get it through her head that Eileen left because she needed to heal. I was a drunk mess, but eventually got it together. The pain I had felt could probably not measure up to what Eileen had been feeling.

I had spent a whole week drinking, and of course, she blamed it on Eileen. Addie still had a lot of growing up to do. It was my fault, I had sheltered her after the death of our parents.

"I'm ending with Julia," I said after a while.

"Holy shit," came Luke's voice from behind.

He had such good timing.

"You are?"

I nodded. "I'm just waiting for her to get here, so you two might want to go hide or something."

"Damn it. We can't watch?"

I glared at Luke, who only smirked.

"So you're ending it for a woman that left you?"

I groaned.

"Eileen didn't leave him," Luke said, offended.

"Of course you'd defend her. You're just as messed up as her."

"Get out," I spat.

"What? Neither of you can take the truth?"

"Out, Adeleine. Out until you get it the fuck together. You know Luke is our family and whether you like it or not Eileen is in the picture for the long run, so get the fuck out."

Addie picked up her purse and stormed out. If this how she reacted I could only imagine what Julia's reaction would be.

A/N: So, Alex has made a decision.

Is there anyone who disagrees?

Let's see how this break up goes.

Comment your thoughts :)

-Luz