"Seriously, we don't need all the injuries for no reason," LIsanna chastises them as they come down covered in injuries. There aren't any major injuries, but there were still a whole motley of scrapes that needed treating.

Who knew the famed, regal Thunder Legion could roughhouse like children once you put them in the same room as Natsu and Gray?

Except Evergreen, she's spotless.

"Ooh, can I brush your hair, Freed?"

"What? No."

"Oh, killjoy."

(They had, in fact, been engaged in quite a rough battle until Laxus literally walked over, said "hey, enough already," And they all simultaneously faltered in their movements, startled to see Laxus had even bothered to grace them with his presence.)

(Natsu tripped over his own feet in the process and went skidding over the ground.)

(Eventually realizing how dumb their feud was, they then all walk down back toward the hall like nothing had happened.)

-

"Oh my."

"Are we allowed to see this?"

"Oh well, I guess we finally have actual confirmation that all the guild masters do in their meetings is drink and gossip."

They do make fancy words and call it a biweekly Guild Master League Meeting and all, but seriously, all they do there is get along, update each other on some new developments and what to watch out for, and then toast to a future of good relations.

It's not as formal or important as council meetings where they stand in high, private and platforms, in sealed rooms, speaking of confidential matters.

This was casual, and consisted more of a banquet than anything else. So basically, it's just a gossip reunion gathering full of old men.

"Dammit, it's just a party?! I knew it!"

"It's just a formality, but it's important as well, Natsu."

"But they didn't invite any of us!"

"...y'know what, you actually have a point."

"Oh lord, it's Master Bob," Gray grimaces at that. "I've always been a little bad with him."

"All Masters have something strangely quirky about them," Erza assures him, "they take some time getting used to, but they're good people, rest assured." Even Makarov was just a strange, tiny old man until you got a closer look at his strength, after all.

"He's a nice Master if you doget to know him though," Loke says.

"Yeah, we know that!" Gray yells, exasperated.

"Master!" a few, very scandalised voices yell out.

"Well, he doeshave a point..."

"Gildarts, be quiet or I'm making you sit through therapy again!"

"I... resent the implications of that."

"Cerberus, huh," Erza hums, "compared to Pegasus or Lamia, they're not as popular, but I do have fond memories of old rivalry."

"I really only remember Bacchus, though," Bickslow says.

"Oh, that guy," Cana mutters, evidently knowing the name but remaining uninterested.

Last time they met, he told her to learn how to hold her liquor so they could have a proper drinking challenge-- despite not being so much older than Cana himself. Adding that on to the fact that they were both, strictly speaking, underage, that was a friendship none of the adults in the guild wanted to promote.

"That's a flag," Levy says. Seriously, sometimes it feels like Master is purposefully tempting fate, and Natsu is always right around the corner to mess things up according to what he most fears.

(Levy wonders if Natsu is Master Makarov's sleep paralysis demon.)

"It definitely is," Bickslow chuckles, "wanna bet on which town it'll be?"

Behind him, his doll swirls about in eerie giggles. "Oshibana! Oshibana!" one suggested, "Kunugi! Shirotsume!" another puts out the ideas.

"Whatever the city, let's hope it's still intact enough to be rebuilt," Gildarts says.

"Speaking from experience, Gildarts?"

"It wasn't my fault and it was only two times."

"Y'know, I think I know where most of our guild gets the destruction bug from."

"No he isn't," Gray says, like a tattletale.

"He's drinking himself silly," Mirajane adds, as if her future self could hear and be mad at him together.

Mira blushes, "hey, I thought that was Enno-san's role!"

"But she isa looker though," Loke has to admit.

Despite their tough and almost feral image, Erza and Mira were two girls in the guild that reallyknew how to clean up. Now, if only they showed off those feminine charms more often instead of acting like total brutes all the time...

"It's still embarrassing to get shown off in front of all the guild masters!" Mira says, heatedly.

"Sounds like it's been a while since we've met them, though," Erza says, "maybe the last time they've known you was when you were still like this."

"So Mira's surprising character change is a shock in the future too, huh..."

There's a round of dry laughter.

"Master's gonna be somad," Elfman chuckles, "he was just talking about it, too."

"Isn't this, his nightmare incarnate?"

"Mira, you're such a sadist," Loke mutters, "well, that's not new information."

"I'm glad to see somepart of me still lives on!" Mirajane grins, strangely gratified. She's been put-off by her new appearance and the mysteries surrounding it for a while now, but that washer, and there were plenty of signs to tell that.

"Oh man, Master's gonna literally worry himself sick one day if we keep doing this to him," Levy sighs.

"Part and parcel of being a dad, I guess."

"...I think we all owe Master an apology when we get back," Lisanna admits, "I'm starting to feel really guilty, even though none of this is our fault."

"We're literally on our way to stop a dark guild, though," Gray argues, "if a town gets destroyed in the process let's call it splash damage."

"Splash damage is horrific if it extends across a whole town, Gray..."

"I'm verysure there's a better word for that."

"Ah man, there's the mass panic," Bickslow sighs, "sometimes I wonder if Dark Guilds do that just so mages and police end up having their forces divided."

"It isthe tactical thing to do," Laxus says.

In fact, attacking uninvolved crowds have always been more beneficial to the criminals.

"Imagine being a civilian in this situation, though," Gray mutters, sympathetic. "One terrible day indeed. Think an office job will let you have a reimbursed leave day if you end up getting caught in a Dark Guild attack?"

"I wish they would," Levy sighs, "but the chances of it happening are so little I don't think they will..."

And because everyone in the room either joined the guild at a young age or began working as a magic mercenary all their life, there was no way they would know that feeling.

"Uh, non-mages sure have it hard, huh."

Someone snorts.

"Someone ain't getting laid tonight now, that's for sure."

"Well, that's reality fer ya. Adults gotta have their priorities straight sometimes."

"You sound like a terrible adult."

"I ama terrible adult."

"Ah, there we are," Gray says, "Erigor's already gone, though, so off we go again."

"Well, it's certainly faster than a four-wheel drive, but I have to wonder why they chose a train of all things," Cana says, "those things only run from East Fiore to South Fiore, y'know. They're a countryside thing."

"Hey, they all rode the train onward to the next stop. Where are they going?" Freed wonders. "If they're just stopping train activity to make sure news doesn't go easily to Clover, then it doesn't make sense that they're on a train headed right for it now."

There's a pause.

Then, "wait," Levy lifts her head, "Freed, say that again."

Freed bites his lip, "their target..." he swears, "Levy, write this down."

"Clover is at the end of the railway they're going," Laxus mutters, sucking in a sharp breath.

They weren't just making sure the Guild Masters stayed-- they were making sure no one else went in, because that was their target all along.

"You are kidding."

"Are they suicidal? The Guild Masters are strong motherfuckers. They know that, right?"

"That's not true," Loke says. "Even among guild masters, Master Makarov is leagues above everyone else. Master Bob and even Miss Porlyusica, all who come from the same generation, simply don't hold a candle to him in magical power."

"And the other guild masters of lesser guilds, some of which don't even have qualified S-class mages, are worse for wear," Gildarts adds on. "They're great leaders-- that's not necessarily a synonym to capable fighter."

The horror of the situation sinks in. It's one thing when they're planning on using the sound-based death magic on a crowd of innocent civilians-- another entirely to aim primarily at the Guild Masters.

(This was such a blatantly spite-filled endeavor, they couldn't help but grimace in the newfound realization.)

Cana groans loudly, "now we have to go through the whole thing of being frustrated that we know something our future selves don't!" she threatens to rip out her hair in frustration.

"And now we have to wait till someone figure it out?" Natsu whines, bashing his head against the table, "this is stupid! We should be able to talk to them!"

"I'd like to see you invent a magic to achieve that," Mira mutters, annoyed. "Look, I'm sure we'll figure it out in time. If there are that many episodes left, that means we lived past this. Don't need to worry about anything."

This elicits a whole chorus of whines.

"Dramatic irony is a bitch," Levy fakes a sob, "we already figured it outttt!"

"But our future selves haven't, so we have to sit through all this until they do," Erza chastises all of them, "now sit still, all of you."

"Woah," Cana lifts her head with sudden interest, "that is definitely the first time we're actually seeing the stripping part of Gray's stripping habit."

A few more heads lift.

"Woah, until now I just thought your clothes vanished cause you always took them off so quickly," Bickslow says.

"Now we see you're just stripping at a normal speed, that's kinda a letdown," Lisanna sighs.

There's a disappointed "aye..." from her lap.

"Now very flattering for those abs, though," Mira says, "never done a striptease before? Get some more fanservice in, Gray! That's what you're here for!"

Loke fixes his glasses, "yeah, Gray, the fangirls will rage if you don't serve, you know?"

"Can you idiots not judge my stripping habitof all things?!"

"Oh, so the army ismoving," Evergreen scowls, "forgot they existed for a bit."

Levy chuckles dryly, "they're always late, after all."

"Distastefully late," Evergreen emphasizes.

There's a very pointed side glance to the other Thunder Legion members, and Levy whispers skeptically to Bickslow, "she got a grudge or somethin'?"

Bickslow just nods sagely.

"Pop tart at Santa Maria," Freed mutters, but gives no elaboration. "Army still doesn't know it was her. We're not planning on changing that."

Wisely, Levy looks away.

Not going to question that.

There's a sharp hiss across the room.

"Did that bastard just swing a scythe at his own guildmate?" Natsu growls, annoyed.

"What did you expect from a Dark Guild?" Gray mutters, "it's backstabbers a second, being used and punished for failure the next. Part and parcel."

"Why do you sound like you're speaking from experience?"

Gray looks away, "chill, I just got caught in the crossfire like thrice."

There's a pause.

"You got caught in two more when I wasn't around?!" Gildarts whirls on him in horror.

Gray rolls his eyes, "oh right, you were there too. I forgot."

"Excuse you brat, you knowI was the highlight of your trip to Fiore don't even pretend."

There's a sharp hiss of horror and Lisanna cringes, hands shooting up to her ears. "Ouuuch, that looks like it hurts."

"A wind mage, huh," Erza surmises. "One of the more violent elements to wield."

"Terrible luck to run into a Dark Mage that would very happily use it to its maximum lethality, then," Mira grumbles. "I'm starting to think you guys should've gone back and called more of us as backup."

"It'll be fine, wind is best countered by physical shields," Gray assures, "between me and Erza, we've got some coverage on that."

"Yeah, but Natsu doesn't," Lisanna says, "it's dangerous for all of you."

"But Natsu is crazy, so he'll be fine," Happy assures.

"Happy, I'm glad you're so confident in me, but the way you said it hurts," Natsu deadpans.