《Spark of Hope》Chapter XXII
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Halls in the Akiva palace were silent. Days earlier, the halls were loud and lively with celebrations. The threat of the entire Galaxy—the First Order—had been vanquished. The Galaxy was free again, and Leia had a feeling it would last this time. Too bad she wouldn't live it.
Leia Organa Solo was dying.
And about time, too.
She was so weary. Too many people had died in her one lifetime.
Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Han.
Admiral Ackbar.
Vice Admiral Holdo.
Luke.
Rey.
Ben.
So many friends and charges under her command as General of the Resistance.
Leia closed her eyes as a tear rolled down her cheek. All those deaths... They at least accomplished the mission of wiping out the First Order, but was losing so many worth it?
She was old and frailer than what she used to be, and her body had taken quite a toll on being sucked out into space, but Leia felt like it was time for her to go because of her shattered soul. With her husband, twin brother, and son gone, there was no reason to keep living. Another tear followed the path of the last one.
Something warm suddenly touched her cheekbone, stopping the tear. She had instructed everyone to leave her be—she didn't think she deserved to die among a group of friends who loved and cared for her. None of the others had.
Faintly, she felt two presences—both familiar and strong in the Force. Leia opened her eyes, expecting to meet blue Force ghosts.
Instead, the two forms were hidden under the hoods of heavy robes. The one with a black-gloved finger against her cheek stood much taller than the one behind. Leia couldn't see the face under the hood, but a scent she hadn't smelled in a long time clung to them.
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That figure squatted to become eye level, then pulled back the hood.
Breath ceased in Leia's throat. Her son. Ben Solo. Her eyes scanned his face, taking in the lush, black hair, piercing dark brown eyes, full lips under the large nose he had grown into, and the scar running down the right side of his nose. No wonder Rey had fallen in love with him: her son was handsome.
Now that she reflected on it, she had never felt his or Rey's death in the Force.
"Ben..." she whispered—the loudest her weak voice would go—as she touched his face.
He caught her hand and held it against him. "Hello, Mother."
Leia looked past him to see Rey removing her hood. She nodded in greeting.
"I meant to come see you sooner," Ben said.
She gave a small smile. "At least I get to see you now.
"I'm so sorry," she began, wanting to free herself of the regret that has long plagued her.
"No, I'm the one who should be sorry," Ben said. "You were only trying to protect me by sending me to Uncle Luke. I felt abandoned, and that's how Snoke got to me. I shouldn't have turned against Master Luke; I shouldn't have blamed you or Father for my anger." Tears brimmed in his eyes. "And Father..."
She wiped away a tear that had begun to fall. "Shhh. Don't hate yourself over Han. He knew his chances of going to you. You know he would've done anything to help you."
Ben nodded. "He did. His death kept the Light inside me alive."
Remembering her promise to Rey, Leia said, "You've come so far." She caressed his face. "I'm so proud of you."
He gave a small smirk. "I didn't do it alone."
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"I know." Her eyes flickered over to Rey. "I'm proud of you too, Rey."
Blushing, Rey ducked her head. "Thanks," she said quietly.
"I wish I could stop time, save you... something, to give us a chance to talk and repair things between us," Ben said. "I don't want you to go." His voice shook.
Tears appeared in her eyes again at the emotion in his voice. "As do I, but all things live and die. It is part of the Force.
"Now, I do not want your last memory of me to be my corpse," Leia said. "Go. Make a life with Rey. Have babies. Finally be happy and at peace."
Ben kissed the inside of her hand, then got up to kiss her forehead.
"I love you, Mom, and I've always looked up to you." He leaned back to look down at her. "I'm sorry I never told you before."
Choked up with emotion, she could barely say, "I love you, too."
Her son gave her one last smile before he turned away to join Rey. After she said her farewells, the Gray Jedi lifted the hoods and moved toward the door, wanting to remain incognito.
Leia watched them leave hand-in-hand before she closed her eyes with a smile on her lips.
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