Elliot P.O.V

" What do you mean you lied.." I say in a whisper. Grayson doesn't answer so I think he must not have heard me. No, I know he heard me.

" Grayson! What the hell did you mean when you said you lied?!" Now I'm yelling and now I'm mad. There's no point being nice about it anymore. I need to know. I can't have cheated on my boyfriend for the same piece of crap whose been hurting me. I thought he changed there's no way it was for nothing.

" GRAYSON ANSWER ME." still no response.

" Stop the car."

" What?" Figures now he answers.

" Stop the car!" I yell opening the car door.

" I swear if you don't open this car door I'll jump out and I mean it!" Grayson slams on the break his grey eyes turning cold. He walks to the other side as I'm about to get out and throws me against the car while he puts on the child safety lock. The car behind us begins honking annoyedly and the driver gets out.

" Hey Get You And Your Sissy Ass Boyfriend Outta Here! Fucking Fags!" Without hesitation Grayson pulls out his gun and shoots the dude in the head along with the person in the passengers side. My body goes limp as the gun shots go off. I find it hard to breathe and am trying to catch my breathe. Grayson throws me into the car, gets in, and drives off. Instead of going to my house he drives past it.

" What the hell Grayson where are we going?? Grayson!"

" One more word and I swear you'll never walk again. By more ways than one." I immediately shut my mouth not saying another word. What if he kills me? How could he shoot someone in cold blood like that? The drivers blood is on my shirt and everything comes back to me.

~ 7 years earlier~

" Elliot my darling. Go hide in the closet and don't forget to lock it okay? You gotta lock it baby mommy will come get you when it's over okay?"

" But mommy I don't want you to get hurt. Why is daddy so mean??"

" He's not mean sometimes he just gets upset I promise it will all be okay soon we will leave and live happily ever after alright?"

" Promise?"

" I promise." She says kissing my forehead. But that day never came. The pounding and yelling of my father and the cries of my mother went on for hours. On.. and on... and on. All I could do was clutch the gun I'd found in my father's drawer in case he came after me. That day my father came home drunk as usual and was beating my mother. Almost everyday of the week he use to beat on her so my mom hid me in the closet to keep him away from me. However, that day there was no stopping him. He never beat my mother that long I was worried, what if he killed her. That was all that was going through my mind. He went inside the drawer where his gun was only to notice it wasn't there. I knew then he was going to try to kill my mother. He began yelling about his gun asking where it was. He grabbed mom by the hair and slammed her against the wall.

" WHERE THE FUCK IS MY GUN YOU STUPID BITCH!"

" Baby I don't have it I promise. I don't know where it is."

" LIAR." he slaps my mother to the floor kicking her stomach. The stomach that was holding my sister.. his daughter. My mother cried at him begging him to stop I couldn't handle it. Then it hit me, if I can use this gun to protect myself why can't I use it to protect my mom. I had to save her. I come out the closet with the gun at my side, my father stopped looking at me.

" Hey kiddo, my big boy. That gun is dangerous you could hurt me or hurt mama. Give me the gun okay? You gotta give me the gun." I shook my head no holding the gun up to him.

" I will protect mom. You can't hurt her anymore!"

" YOU FUCKING BRAT GIMME THE GUN!! I'LL KILL YOU AND HER!!" My mom gets up as my dad charges at me. I'm scared I love my father but I love my mother more, I will protect her. I close my eyes and shoot. I didn't know. I had no clue my mother was standing in front of my dad to protect me from getting hit. The bullet went through her head and through my father's heart. Killing them both instantly. I only wanted to protect her I never meant to hurt her. The police come inside right after and attempt to save them. One picks me up holding me tightly and hugging me telling me it was gonna be okay. But it wasn't and I knew that. Nobody asked me any questions and nobody said anything. Everybody knew what was going on for years. The neighbors knew and they waited until the very end to say something. If only I'd waited a minute longer dad would've gone to prison and everything would've been fine. It's my fault she's dead. After that I was put in an orphanage and met Levi. He was there too but he got out later when his mom was able to take care of him again. I ended up living with my Grandma and surprisingly Levi and I met back up in middle school. We've been inseparable since. My grandma taught me piano she never asked me to do anything but that. She said it would make me feel better. So from 11-14 I played for and with her anytime she wanted, She was a musical prodigy but stop playing at 50 because she developed arthritis. However at 14 I began living a lie. I smoked and got caught up with the wrong people and in the wrong things. I'd cuss my grandma out and be bad just doing anything to numb the pain. Then 6 months later she asked me to play piano. I told her no and began cussing her out telling her to get off my back. She hugged me telling me all she wanted was for me to be happy and that piano would save me. That if I would give myself in I would become one with it and everything that haunted me would be gone. That I'd be okay. I should've listened but I pushed her off calling her an old hag and saying she would die soon anyway so it didn't matter. In that moment she fell to the ground had a heart attack and died. Because of me. I killed her the same way I killed my mother. Because I couldn't stay in the closet and just be quiet. I promised myself as I stood at her grave I would forever play piano, I would never hurt another person, I would never say another evil word, and more importantly I'd never cuss again. Soon after I realized I was gay, moved schools, played piano becoming one with the muse like she wanted me to, and got bullied of course. All she ever wanted for me was to become better and for 7 months all I did was break her heart and get worse. Yet to the very last moment she never hated me. In the mist of me changing I found a diary of her talking about me. "I love my grandson. My precious girl's son. I just want him to okay. I don't have long left and I know that but I hope until the very end I can at least see him smile." Her wish never came true. In her final moments I yelled at her I never smiled. How could I be so heartless? Afterwards, I kept the journal with me reading everyday she wrote about me for the last 5 years and I became better and I never broken my promise. Until Grayson. I've watched 2 people die, broken a heart, and I've cussed. Again I'm changing and I realize it. Now I'm 17 years old still living in the same world and still living with a different lie. I don't think I can come back from this.