"No the brake Ada."

"Ada the brake..."

"ADELAIDE. FOOT... ON... THE BREAK."

I slammed my foot down and sent Carson flying forward, even with his seat belt buckled. He hit his head on the glove compartment with a thick thump.

"Jesus Ada." He said while rubbing his forehead, "I knew you wouldn't be a pro right off the bat, but I expected a little more from you."

"Sorry." I replied.

Carson had taken me out to an empty parking lot so that he can give me my first lesson on driving.

I'm sure I would have been better at it if I had been more focused, but my mind had been elsewhere since Tristan and I had our little talk yesterday.

At least it was almost the weekend. I spent all day today avoiding any type of contact with him, which wasn't that hard since he's been doing the same.

I would use the time I had away from him to focus on myself.

I told the girls about what happened this morning when they noticed I was upset, and they've been completely supportive about the entire situation. We planned to have a girl's night tomorrow after school instead of going to the football game like we usually do.

I had been begging Carson to take me driving for the past two weeks or so and he's said no to me every time. I guess he felt bad for me, because today he was the one to suggest we go for our first lesson.

"Alright, take it from the top now. Hands on ten and two. Ease off the brake. Ease."

The car slowly moved forward, and it was smooth sailing. Until a moment later.

I didn't mean to put my foot down on the accelerator, it just happened. The boost in speed propelled the car forward a couple of feet and the pole that was so far away just a second ago was now fast approaching.

"Brakes, find the brakes."

I tried to hit the brakes, but my foot got twisted and I just hit the accelerator even more.

The pole was becoming closer and closer until it was right upon us and I swerved out the way at the very last second. I took my eyes off the road to look down, find the brake pad, and slam on it once again.

The tires screeched in response and when we were at a complete stop, Carson put the car on park himself.

And then he let out an obnoxiously loud sigh of relief, "I think I just saw my life flash before my eyes, and it wasn't that pleasant."

"You should probably do something about that."

"What? No, I didn't mean my life you idiot. I meant the near-death experience."

"oh." I said lamely.

Suddenly the air in the car was feeling tighter and I felt claustrophobic. I opened the car door to climb out and walk towards the front of the vehicle. I stopped and leaned against the hood of the car, taking one deep breath in, and slowly letting it out again.

I heard Carson's door open and shut. He joined me on the hood of the car and we stood there in silence for a while before he asked softly, "Should we talk about it?"

I spoke slowly, "he doesn't want to see me, and... all I want to do is see him."

"Is it because he fights illegally? Is that why y'all are in this mess?"

"oh my god, did everyone know about him before I did?"

"Well not exactly, but you just confirmed it for me."

I turned to look at him without saying anything and he went on, "Tate told me it's what he does when we hung out a few days ago, and since Tristan is his best friend somehow from different schools, they had to have met somewhere. Plus, the way Tristan fought at that party? Wasn't that hard to connect the dots from there."

"That was uncharacteristically smart of you."

"Nah, Tristan just has one of those faces you know?"

"Nevermind."

He shoved his shoulder into mine, "he probably didn't mean it. Whatever he said to you."

I thought about this for a second and it made me upset once again, "I just got used to it Carson. I got used to seeing him every day and talking to him and being happy around him. And then he just... steps out... like it didn't mean anything to him and i'm supposed to just be okay with it.

My eyes blurred and I realized that it was because tears had flooded them, only I didn't want to cry again so I blinked them away furiously.

But I had more to say, "It's not fair of him. It was one thing for him to leave when we were twelve, I mean we were kids and it was easier to deal with... but now?" My voice quivered at my last word and I couldn't blink the tears away any longer.

I felt a pair of arms wrap around me in a familiar hug. It wasn't his usual annoying bear hug though, it was softer and he wasn't doing it to bother me, he was doing it do to comfort me.

"Why are boys so stupid Carson?" I spoke into his chest.

"Hey don't ask me. I wear the crown of stupidity."

And that made me laugh through my tears. I pushed him away and wiped my cheeks dry.

"Come on, let's go get you a milkshake doofus. And I will be driving us there, thank you very much."

So he did, and I found myself thinking about how Carson was a verified idiot of a brother, but when it counted, he sure was a good one.

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