《Agreement of Being Gay for 30 Days [協議攪基30天]》022; "cooking together...what is this demon flavour?!"
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"Shou shou, what dishes are you preparing to make?" While throwing vegetables into a small trolley, Zhang Lingyi watched with curiosity at Wang Guangning's serious appearance as he stared at two small boxes of pork belly and compared them.
They were at a large supermarket near Zhang Lingyi's house. They had just finished their exam in the morning and Zhang Lingyi had kidnapped Wang Guangning over.
As it was during a day shift, there weren't many people. Zhang Lingyi strolled around contentedly and grabbed quite a few things while he was it. In any case, they would be at his house for the next two days so they could just store up more food.
However, Wang Guangning's manner as he chose the food was quite clumsy......uh, quite cautious.
"Hmph. I'm preparing to make something that will startle the gods and move the devils......twice-cooked pork belly!" When he finished speaking, Wang Guangning finally chose one from the two boxes of pork belly.
"O_O You're so capable!" Zhang Lingyi was very surprised. While the method of cooking this dish was not hard, it was difficult to make it taste delicious. It was easy to accidentally overcook the meat, add too much oil, or not have suitable ingredients.
However, upon seeing Wang Guangning's confident manner as if he had a card up his sleeve, Zhang Lingyi thought that his previous behaviour of looking down on Wang Guangning just because of the other's slow way of choosing food was incorrect.
That is, even though he couldn't tell what was so good about the food picked out by Wang Guangning after comparing them with others for half a day.
Hence, the two people roamed around leisurely for an hour. In the end, the food that Wang Guangning had reaped were the pork belly, chilli, Chinese onions, fresh ginger and garlic.
Zhang Lingyi's harvest was...a completely full trolley filled with countless food.
Wang Guangning frowned as he watched Zhang Lingyi stuff the vegetables, meat and snacks into his environmentally friendly bag. "You bought so much food, are you going to cook all of it?"
Without lifting his head, Zhang Lingyi replied, "If I can't cook it, why would I buy them? Could it be that you can't cook everything that you have bought?"
Wang Guangning, "......" En, understanding recipes could be counted as knowing how to cook, right? He silently touched the phone in his pocket. Thinking of the recipes he had saved in it, Wang Guangning felt a little more at ease.
Wang Guangning and Zhang Lingyi were both the only children of their family. However, it was very obvious that their cooking skills couldn't be simply described with the phrase 'a world of difference'.
The reason for this difference was because Wang Guangning had always lived with his parents, while Zhang Lingyi's parents were usually out working in other places.
Zhang Lingyi silently stood at one side as he watched Wang Guangning awkwardly chopping the chilli.
Reality proved that people who were good at studying weren't necessarily capable in putting that into practice. For example, Wang Guangning. Although he could memorise the recipe for twice-cooked pork belly after reading it once, but in reality, actually using the pots, bowls, ladles and even the chopping knife was not as easy to grasp as stated in the recipes. Despite already being very cautious and solemn, the chilli chopped by Wang Guangning were all uneven in size and severely unbalanced.
Zhang Lingyi stared at the tragic sight on the kitchen counter and finally was unable to bear it any longer. "Do you need me to help you?"
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"I don't need any!" Wang Guangning flew into a rage out of humiliation, thinking Zhang Lingyi was mocking him. Hence, he brought the knife down forcefully, wanting to score a victory in an imposing manner. Only......
"Fuck!" A small piece of chilli bounced up into Wang Guangning's eye and he promptly raised his hand to rub at it. As a person who had no cooking experience, he naturally didn't know that hands shouldn't be used to directly knead the eye when chopping chilli.
"Ah, don't use you hand to rub your eye!" Zhang Lingyi immediately moved to pull Wang Guangning's hand away, but he was already too late. Consequently, in the next second, Wang Guangning began to stomp and hop about due to the chilli. "Fuck. Fuck. It stings! It stings!"
Zhang lingyi didn't know whether to laugh or cry as he stared at the rare scene of Wang Guangning appearing stupid. Shaking his head, he pressed on the tap and said, "Quickly wash it with fresh water."
Then he went to get another bowl and filled it with a bit of white vinegar mixed with water. Finding a towel, he said, "Come, I'll wipe it for you."
Wang Guangning lifted his head from the tap; his eyes already faintly swollen. There was a tug in Zhang Lingyi's heart and he said softly, "Don't move your hand. I'll wipe it for you, and it'll get better soon."
Following that, he moistened the towel and then carefully rubbed Wang Guangning's eye.
Wang Guangning's eyes were closed while he muttered, "Why is it so spicy? This is unscientific!"
He didn't have any common sense, yet dared to blame science!
Zhang Lingyi silently disdained him, but upon seeing Wang Guangning's uncomfortable complexion, didn't end up saying anything.
After wiping it with white vinegar, Wang Guangning could finally open his eyes. Although it was still slightly swollen and uncomfortable, it wasn't as serious as before. Hence, he once again rolled up his sleeves and returned to the kitchen counter.
Zhang Lingyi gazed at Wang Guangning as well as the kitchen in concern. "Shou shou, how about I cook instead?"
"That won't do!" Wang Guangning said with a hmph. "Don't look down on me, I will definitely cook a delicacy capable of startling the gods and moving the devils!" In any case, he had spent time to download that recipe, so how could he just waste it?
Furthermore, people who went into the kitchen to prepare a meal for the first time would always carry an incomprehensible excitement.
Upon hearing Wang Guangning's words, Zhang Lingyi was even more horrified. Looking at the other's clumsy appearance, the food made by Wang Guangning might not startle the gods, but he was afraid it would really move the devils!
Zhang Lingyi still wanted to attempt to persuade him, but Wang Guangning shot a glare at him. Pressing both of his hands on Zhang Lingyi shoulders, Wang Guangning pushed him out. "Zhang Lingyi, you go out. Wait until I'm finished and then you can come back in."
It must be because Zhang Lingyi had stood at the side and disturbed him so everything hadn't proceeded smoothly!
Wang Guangning found an exceptionally good excuse for his own mistake.
Hence, Zhang Lingyi sat in the living room with fear and trepidation in his heart as he listened to the ping ping pang pang noises mixed with the occasional sound of chinaware shattering as it transferred from the kitchen.
Inside, Zhang Lingyi wailed in anguish. What exactly was Wang Guangning doing? Did he bomb the kitchen? As for every time he attempted to approach the kitchen, Wang Guangning would fly into a rage and roar at him to go away.
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Zhang Lingyi endured the double torment to his ears and mind while also silently encouraging himself and boosting his morale. A good xiao gong ought to forgive their shou shou without reason or a bottom line!
Thereupon, after a seemingly endless hour had passed, Wang Guangning finally waved a hand in command and summoned xiao Zhang. "Zhang Lingyi, I'm done. It's your turn now."
Zhang Lingyi drew in a couple of deep breaths. After completing adequate preparation, he finally pasted on a nonchalant expression and entered the kitchen.
Yi, the kitchen was unexpectedly very normal!
Zhang Lingyi's eyes brightened and he silently denounced himself. He shouldn't judge people......uh, cooking skills based on the sounds he heard.
So it turned out that Wang Guangning's cooking only sounded frightening, but the process should still be quite good?
Feeling gratitude, Zhang Lingyi glanced at Wang Guangning, only to find Wang Guangning's complexion was somewhat unnatural. It was slightly stiff and he was even blushing.
Yi, shou shou could actually blush? So miraculous!
"Shou shou, is this your twice-cooked pork belly? Let me have a look." Zhang Lingyi saw that there was a plate with a lid covering it sitting on the dining table and presumed that it was Wang Guangning's work. As he said this, he went to take the lid off the plate.
"You're not allowed." Wang Guangning swatted his hand away and glared at him. He said snappily, "Quickly make your dishes."
"Why are you so fierce!" Zhang Lingyi curled his lips and secretly cursed inside. Why are you making it so mysterious? Sooner or later, you will have to take it out for me to see!
Finishing his silent cursing, Zhang chef rolled up his sleeved in a practiced manner to begin cooking.
Then......
"Yi, how come there seems to be so many more plates?" In regards to the highly amiss number of plates in the cupboard, Zhang Lingyi could only stare blankly. En, it wasn't just limited to the plates, the amount of bowls also seemed to be wrong...
An ominous feeling appeared in Zhang Lingyi's heart. He silently scanned the kitchen counter, where the quantity of oil, salt, soy sauce and vinegar was also wrong. A few of those bottles were clearly ones which he had just bought, but now they all contained less than a third of their original amount.
In that one hour when he wasn't in the kitchen, exactly what had happened?
Zhang Lingyi knew that under these types of circumstances, the truth was usually in the rubbish bin. Thus, taking advantage of when Wang Guangning was paying attention, he stealthily shifted over next to the bin.
The rubbish bin was closely packed......with fragments of chinaware, as well as suspicious objects which were charred and greasy. Based on the colour of the edges of those objects that hadn't yet been completely scorched, Zhang Lingyi judged that it should be the chilli and...en, seemed like pork belly strips!
Ah, this truly was a bitter situation!
Zhang Lingyi silently consoled himself.
Since the matter had already reached to this point, it was better to not investigate further!
Two drops of bitter tears flowed from Zhang Lingyi's eyes. Then he summoned his spirits and quickly threw himself into cooking.
Zhang Lingyi's cooking skills were evidently on a different level compared to Wang Guangning. Before an hour had passed, two steaming and delicious dishes were placed onto the dining table.
Wang Guangning stretched his head and saw that they were satay beef and crab meat with tofu.
The soup of the satay beef was dense and creamy, appearing quite glossy. The exotic aroma of the dish assailed his olfactory senses.
The crab meat with tofu gave the impression of looking even more exquisite, causing one's appetite to increase even further.
Wang Guangning felt as if he was somewhat laden with grief.
"Let's eat!" Zhang Lingyi carried over two bowls of rice and beamed as he said, "Let me experience your twice-cooked pork belly that startles the gods and moves the devils!"
In all honesty, Zhang Lingyi wasn't trying to be sarcastic when he spoke these words.
But Wang Guangning's ears flushed upon hearing it, and he covered the plate with both of his hands, "Forget about it, let's not eat this today."
"Ah, don't shou shou!" Zhang Lingyi quickly pushed away Wang Guangning's hands, With an expression of righteousness, he said, "Don't worry, I won't look down on you."
"Who's afraid of you looking down on them?" Wang Guangning gave up and unfolded his hands. "I'm only afraid that you'll be unable to stop yourself from eating more later on."
No matter what, he mustn't lose face. He should first take control of the atmosphere.
Hence, Zhang Lingyi prepared himself mentally while opening the lid of the dish.
En, only when he had mentally prepared himself could he be capable of holding an unperturbed expression.
Zhang Lingyi calmly stared at the plate......where there was roughly only one-quarter the original amount of pork belly they had bought. He succeeded in not permitting his true feelings from splitting open.
"Ah, shou shou's cooked this quite well!" Zhang Lingyi said, with one hand covering his chest. Indeed, his words were so false that it made one unable to look straight.
In any case, judging from the colour of the chillies, they should still be undercooked. So how come the Chinese onions were so black? And the fresh ginger, didn't they seem to be cut into too large a piece?
As for the main lead of this dish, Mr Pork Belly, why were the edges evidently burnt, yet the center parts seemingly still raw?
Fuck, was Wang Guangning the personal disciple of their cafeteria's Head Chef?
This wasn't scientific, alright? Even when he cooked for the first time, there was no way he could have been able to completely burn one side of a piece of meat, but keep the other side raw.
Zhang Lingyi really wanted to kneel to Wang Guangning.
As a result of Zhang Lingyi's words, Wang Guangning's eyes shone and he said, "Really? Then you should quickly eat it!" As he spoke, Wang Guangning enthusiastically grabbed a large piece of pork belly with his chopsticks and moved it towards Zhang Lingyi's mouth.
Who told you to lie?! Who told you to lie?!
A person who speaks false words must swallow a thousand needles╭(╯^╰)╮!
Don't think that just by adopting a sincere expression, I won't see the twitching at the corner of your lips!
Wang Guangning's heart truly was extremely petty.
At this moment, Zhang Lingyi deeply admired his own skill. Confronted with that piece of...pork belly that was almost within reach, his expression unexpectedly did not change. "En, I'll eat it. You should eat too."
Then, like a hero meeting his death unflinchingly, Zhang Lingyi swallowed it into his mouth.
Ah, what kind of demon flavour was this?!
Was this an unavoidable test that every man who became a loyal dog and emperor type gong had to face?
The tears in Zhang Lingyi's heart had already become a river.
Wang Guangning didn't expect that Zhang lingyi would really eat it. Looking at the other's expression as if he was suffering yet still enduring silently, Wang Guangning restrained himself and didn't laugh. "How does it taste?"
Expressionlessly, Zhang Lingyi replied, "Not bad."
"Then you should eat some more, don't waste it." While saying this, Wang Guangning viciously and mercilessly picked up the entire plate of twice-cooked pork belly and poured it into Zhang Lingyi's bowl.
Zhang Lingyi, "......"
"You must finish eating it with a smile." Wang Guangning said with deadly earnestness. Then he picked up a piece of beef with his chopsticks and lowered his head to devour it.
En, there indeed wasn't much to say about Zhang Lingyi's cooking skills. The fragrance of the satay had already permeated the beef, which was very fresh, tender and crisp. The crab meat with tofu was extremely sweet and creamy, instantly melting upon being ingested. Inwardly, Wang Guangning yelled 'delicious', but his expression was still aloof. It was just that his chopsticks evidently moved very fast.
A while later, the food on the table had already been reduced to half.
Having eaten until he was nearly full, Wang Guangning realised that Zhang Lingyi didn't seem to have tasted his own dishes yet. Lifting his head, he found that Zhang Lingyi unexpectedly...was still eating the twice-cooked pork belly.
Although his speed was very slow, Zhang Lingyi truly was chewing the meat mouthful by mouthful.
Feeling somewhat upset, Wang Guangning grabbed Zhang Lingyi's bowl and said, "Don't eat any more, it's not even delicious." His voice seemed slightly depressed. Even though he had deliberately played the joke on Zhang Lingyi, he hadn't genuinely wished for the other to correspond accordingly.
Wang Guangning felt as if he was unable to understand his own frame of mind.
"Ah, I really do think it tastes quite good!" Zhang Lingyi smiled mischievously, "This is the first time our shou shou has cooked, so of course I must finish it all~!" Finishing his words, he reached out for his bowl.
"You're not allowed to eat any more." With a fierce look on his face, Wang Guangning walked directly to the rubbish bin and poured the rest of the rice and meat into it. Then he filled Zhang Lingyi's bowl with fresh rice again.
"Here, eat it properly and don't mess around." Acting peeved, Wang Guangning pushed the bowl of rice towards Zhang Lingyi. "Wash the dishes after you're done with eating." After he spoke, he then walked out into the dining room to watch TV.
Zhang Lingyi stared at Wang Guangning's back and silently sighed, "Ah, he really was proud and arrogant!"
But his pride and arrogance was extremely cute!
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On one hand, I'm amazed by Wang Guangning's level of pettiness. On the other, I'm astounded by his cooking skills ( : ౦ ‸ ౦ : )
On a different note, I'm planning to translate another novel, Rebirth into an Interstellar Marriage, which is also BL but set in the entertainment circle. It's written by the same author as Rebirth of a Supermodel and Superstar Aspirations (which are both amazing novels > .
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