Laura

"Are you sure you're up for this?" I asked for what must have been the millionth time that evening. Lilly had it in her head that she would forget about Harry if she went out for the night with her friends and got totally wasted. I, being the caring girlfriend I was, had invited myself along. I knew it would be awkward and that her friends wouldn't be comfortable around me but I was certain she wasn't doing as amazingly as she claimed.

"Yeah, I'm good, babe," Lilly kissed my cheek as she passed by. "Stop worrying." She was getting ready while I sat on her bed, watching.

"I can't help it," I said and it was true; I couldn't. I knew how much it had torn her up when she visited her brother's grave on his birthday so to believe that she was alright; with him suddenly being back from the dead was a little far fetched. Especially when he had left without giving her any answers.

"Baby, don't. I'm really upset that he left but that's what tonight is for. It's going to help me get over everything. I can't keep turning into a wreck every times someone mentions his name. It just isn't practical." She turned to face me from her wardrobe and smiled. "I'm okay. Honestly."

I didn't reply. I was kind of lost for words. She had matured so much in the space of a few weeks. My little high school Lilly was all grown up. I felt like a mother, watching my child grow. Well, a mother who was sleeping with her daughter.

Having successfully weirded myself out, I simply nodded to my girlfriend then lay back on her bed. A few minutes passed then someone dug their fingers into my side making me crumple in on myself defensively. My attacker then targeted my other side and I tried to scramble away from them but they pinned me in place. I fought against the assault, not able to contain squeals of disapproval, until I managed to flip the person pinning me. I then proceeded to tickle them until they begged me to stop.

"You're horrible," Lilly said.

"You started it," I replied, releasing her and flopping down beside her on the bed.

"I ... uh ... fuck," she swore, knowing she had lost. I grinned at my victory and she jabbed my cheek. "Stop that, I let you win."

"Uh huh, sure you did," I only grinned wider. She rolled over so she was facing me and stared at me with those killer blue eyes that were now bright with exertion.

"I did." She nodded. "You should feel honoured, not many people get to win against me."

"It must be my superior intelligence," I smirked and she rolled her eyes. "Or my dazzling good looks," I said, winking, and this time she couldn't hold back a smile.

"Nah, it's just cos I lo-" She choked and started coughing loudly, her face turning a shde of red I hadn't seen for a while. She jumped off the bed and ran out of the room, leaving me alone and unsure of what had just happened. Had she just...? Was she going to say that she ... no, she couldn't have. She wasn't in ... in love with me.

I lay still, my heart racing. My thoughts swirled around my head like water rushing down a drain. Then I surprised myself. I got up and went in search of her. She found me first.

She was sporting a huge grin and she jumped into my arms when she saw me.

"You'll never guess what," she said into my neck, her breath warming my neck.

"You're right," I replied, holding her up. "I'll never guess. Tell me."

"Jarrod found his boo, he's bringing her home." I could hear the delight in her voice.

"That's great, babe," I said, gently putting her down, but not without quickly grabbing her butt. She smirked when I released her and leaned in quickly. Our mouths met in a long, passionate kiss unlike any she'd delivered in a long time. Her hands were in my hair, stroking my sides, holding my hips tightly.

Lilly's mum called her. She ignored it for a short time, keeping her body pressed tight against mine for a few seconds longer. When she retreated she put so little space between us I could still feel the heat of her skin. She held my gaze. The air buffer between us became thick with unspoken wants and thoughts. My heart was tripping over itself, finding it difficult to keep a steady beat. I knew what to say. I knew it. I felt the words swelling in my throat, coating my tongue, ready to be said, needing to escape, desperate for her to know, going to choke me if I didn't utter them but I couldn't! I just couldn't.

Her mum called again. She pecked my lips. Then she turned and was gone. And I hadn't said it. And I knew I should have and that I had fallen so hard I'd face planted straight into a concrete walk way. Jesus Christ, I was in love with her.

I'd never been in love before. My entire life I'd avoided it like the plague. I had no idea it could be so wonderfully terrifying. Or that it could sneak up on you so suddenly, like a ninja in the night, except this ninja you never wanted to run from. You only wanted to cuddle it and bask in it's warmth and your own happiness.

"Anyone there? Hellooo?" Anne was standing in front of me and waving a hand in front of my face, managing to look both concerned and irritated.

"Yeah," I rubbed the back of my neck and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, I zoned out."

"I see," Anne smiled knowingly. "Well, my sister is in the kitchen," she practically sang the words, her smile widening. "Go get her."

"God damn, this love bullshit is making me a sap." I muttered to myself as I went to the kitchen.

She was there, just as Anne had said, engaged in a very excited conversation with her mum. I leaned against the door frame, crossing my arms and just watching.

"Do you think they've said it yet?" Lilly asked, sounding excited.

"I don't know, honey. I doubt it." Mrs Daniels replied. Neither had noticed my arrival. "I would think you'd be first," she had taken on a teasing tone now, "have you told her yet?"

"No, mum!" Lilly whined, embarrassed. "She doesn't know, so don't say anything to her, okay?"

"Well, it might help hurry things along."

"Mum! I'm being serious!"

"Alright, baby, I won't say anything."

"Don't call me baby, I'm an adult."

"Don't call me mum then, I'm Maggie now."

I retreated from the doorway; it was clear the conversation had moved on. Had Lilly been talking about me when she said "she doesn't know"? What didn't I know? What was she keeping from me? I didn't like the idea that she wasn't telling me something. It made me apprehensive. But then, remembering the incident earlier in the bedroom, maybe it wasn't anything to be nervous about. Yeah, that was it. That was all it was.

I smiled to myself and went back to the kitchen. Instead of stopping in the doorway I went into the room and prodded Lilly, to announce my arrival.

"We should probably go now," I indicated the clock which showed that it was a little past nine.

"Yeah! I told Tanya and Sheridan we'd meet them at nine." She hugged her mum then grabbed my hand. "Come on, babe."

"Have fun," Mrs Daniels said, winking at me. I smiled and let myself be dragged from the room by a beautiful blonde.

***

We got there half an hour late and were further delayed waiting to get into the night club. We couldn't find them until these two crazy things flung themselves at Lilly.

"Babe!" They were screaming. "You're alive." Then they looked at me and Tanya awkwardly bobbed her head at me.

"Miss."

"Tanya," I responded. There was a silence.

"Sooooo," Sheridan sang, "let's go." She linked arms with Tanya and dragged her over to the bar. Lilly grabbed my hand and followed. Damn, this was going to be incredibly awkward. Why had I even come?

We all took some shots.

"So," Sheridan smirked at my girlfriend, "what's it like fucking a teacher?" Lilly's mouth dropped open, her eyes widened and her whole face flushed. I started to laugh. Lilly glared at me as she searched for something to say. I decided to help her out.

"It's pretty good from what I've heard," I smirked and Lilly's face turned a shade darker.

"Don't take their side! You're supposed to defend me."

"My apologies, would you like me to beat this scoundrel?"

"Stop making fun of me," Lilly whined.

"Oh my," Tanya breathed.

"Cute," Sheridan whispered back. I rolled my eyes. These children were obviously deluded, clearly anything involving me was badass, but I let it go. Like in the song. Except there was no snow and I was obviously not as good at holding my drink as I had thought. I was already affected by the alcohol and I'd only had a couple of shots. No more for me, or I would end up regretting it. Getting drunk had lost its appeal when I'd woken up in a cardboard box one morning with no clothes on and clutching a pink feather boa. That wasn't the worst part, though. The worst part was that there was a homeless man sleeping beside me and he was wearing my clothes. Needless to say I'd always been the designated driver at every party I attended after that.

"Let's dance," Tanya suggested and we joined the throngs of sweaty people moving in time with the loud, pulsing music.

***

Lilly's friends were actually really fun once we'd gotten past the initial discomfort. I felt like we were all friends now, even though Tanya still insisted upon calling me "Miss". I was actually quite disappointed to be going home, I'd had more fun than I had had in a while. But it was getting late and we all had things to do the next day, so we said our goodbyes just outside the club and parted ways.

Lilly and I were waiting on a taxi when a skinhead approached us, lurching slightly. He leered at me before his eyes fell on Lilly and he moved towards her, a stupid grin on his face.

"Hey, beautiful," he slurred, reaching out a hand towards her face. She moved back a few steps, avoiding his touch. He dropped his hand but apparently didn't get the hint, stumbling closer. "You wanna go have some fun, sexy?" Lilly moved closer to me at that and grasped my hand tightly. It trembled slightly. She was scared. That put me into full protective mode and I angled my body in front of hers and between her and the man. "Your friend can come too," he smiled at me, his eyes mostly closed in a drunken stupor.

"She doesn't want to go anywhere with you and neither do I. So please leave us alone." I said, as politely as I could.

"She does want to, don't you, gorgeous?" He tried to peer around me and get her.

"No, no she doesn't."

He stumbled forward and clawed at her arm, trying to pull her towards him. I grabbed his arm and twisted it round behind his back, then knocked his knees out from under him so he ended up on the ground.

"Bitch," he hissed. I smiled at him then let him go.

"C'mon, babe." We walked away, leaving him on the ground. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." She rubbed her neck and glanced back at the man trying to get up. "Just got a fright."

I wrapped my arms tightly around her, "I'll always protect you, you never have to worry about anything like that again, okay?" I looked into her eyes, ensuring she saw how serious I was. "I promise." I brushed a strand of hair from her face and kissed her on the forehead gently.

"Thank you," she whispered and I nodded.

"Here's our taxi," I led her towards the car. I wrapped her tightly in my arms and held her that way for the entire ride home.

Later that night, I lay in the dark, gently stroking her hair. Whenever I stopped she would start whining like an abandoned puppy and cuddle closer into me until I started again. Her face was pressed against my collar bone and her breath tickled my skin. She mumbled something in her sleep and I smiled to myself.

"I love you," I whispered. "I love you so much it makes my heart feel like it's going to burst." The dark remained the same, her deep breathing didn't change. The words I thought would change my life had simply rolled off my tongue like it was natural. The world hadn't reached the catastrophic end I had imagined. It was all so easy. I loved her and that was all that mattered. "I never thought I would fall in love. I thought it was stupid and that I didn't need that in my life. Actually, no, I thought it would make me weak. I was terrified of that. I mean, I'd already been so weak once before, I never wanted to let my guard down like that again. I just never realized how amazing it would be. And how perfect you would be, even when you're scared, or angry or upset. I love you, Lilly Daniels." I stopped, thinking hard about everything I'd said, acknowledging how true the words were. "Thank god you didn't hear any of that." I laughed softly, closed my eyes and went to sleep.