against the window, especially with our ragged breathing, like we ran a marathon.

" I don't think i can get used to being buried inside you" He mummurs.

I don't respond, letting out a lazy smile.

He pulls back and looks at me, his stares are always so intimate and drugging.

I blush.

He pulls out of me softly, making me wince. Then he settles me on the window fur sofa, pushing my hair out of my face still staring me down to my soul.

He walks away to God knows where.

I bite my lips, smiling softly and start to adjust my dress.

He comes back with a wet fresh towel and.... cleans me up making me blush. He's literally on his knees cleaning me up.

"So...?" He starts "I was going to take you somewhere before you decided to make me hard again and unable to control myself"

"Of course, It's my fault"

"It is butterfly"

I shake my head "So where do you want to take me?"

"Somewhere"

"Okay Mr Mysterious is it like a date?" I ask as he start to tug me to my feet.

"Whatever you want Foxie"

"No Nikolai, specifics. Is it a date or not?"

"Fine it's a date"

I grin. " I'll be back"

I go to my changing room, i take the fastest shower, scent up and grab a different dress. It's nude, has a dangerous slit and I don't need a bra.

I'm out in ten minutes.

"I know women take longer than that to get changed" He lifts a brow turning away from the flower on my desk "El takes at least an hour, and you look.... beautiful Diayhana"

I had no idea my name could be pronounced in a hot Russian accent until Nikolai.

I blush again.

"Thank You. El probably takes that long because of makeup" I laugh because he's staring at me like I'm an alien "Stop looking at me like that"

"Shall we?"

I grab my coat and purse, i move to grab his hand but i feel him move his hand on the low of my back.

"Is that my hair tie on your wrist?"

"I may have stolen it the day i was at your place" He response nonchalantly.

"That is not weird at all"

"It is not" He states proudly pulling open his passengers car door for me.

"Can you tell me where you're taking me?" I ask watching him slide into the driver seat.

"Definitely not"

"Will you make me that drink you mixed for me at your club?" I ask excitedly buckling in.

"Anything you want Foxie" I feel his hand on my thighs as soon as he starts driving making my breath hitch.

"So i wanted to ask you something if it doesn't make you uncomfortable"

"I'll answer if i can, so ask"

"Jer told me your parents died when you were young so did El adopt you?"

"Sort of, she's my mom's step sister"

"Oh"

"Yes, and She stuck around through my shït, so it's alright if she's my mom. I'm okay with that" I know he left out a lot but I don't want to pry.

"And your brother. The red head motherfûcker, with his fücking crazy eyes. How are you both related?"

"We've been friends since i was five, he likes to treat me like his younger brother when he's only a month older. He's an asshole but he protected me from a lot of..... from a lot shït Foxie. His mom wanted to adopt me when i was five but she died. So blood or not he's still my brother"

"I love how bonded all of you are, I don't know how you can stand KT added to it but. I see how much you all care about each other" I respond softly, I didn't want to sound deprived or jealous. But i hear the soft emptiness in my voice

"I still don't like the red head even if he's as hot as satans balls on Friday acute flame assembly"

"What in the world was that description, and I'm much better looking" He glances at me like I'm crazy, his palm squeezing on my thigh.

"Of course" I laugh then I remember something else "So the Russian girl.... with white eyes?" I ask looking at him because I've been wanting to ask this.

"I told you she's taken. She doesn't see me that way, she's like my little sister and I guess we relate....in some ways. Shawn will have my ass if i looked at her differently."

I wonder what he means by that. Relate to what.

Is it because she's Russian?

Well he said she isn't.

"And do you? Are you sure you don't like her. She's quite attractive with her full curves and heaven eyes, angelic and shït like she sings to clouds and part them"

He laughs " My head is starting to hurt with your descriptions. I think I like you jealous foxie, just like the day of the meeting. You made her so uncomfortable and made my dïck so hard watching your nostrils flare"

"Bïtch! You didn't answer my question" I blush, I thought i was subtle

"I admit little Grey is okay, she's stunning and of course I found her attractive. But I don't feel like staring at her all day long, she's not you Foxie, like i said she's like a little sister to me"

"Do you usually kiss your sisters"

"Fuvk! I was shït faced that night it didn't help that she also has long hair and fox eyes, and a part of me did it to get your attention. You never came of course, you definitely know how to make a man feel degraded without trying. And Shawn's whole ударять меня по зубам punch to knock me out that night was for kissing his girl which i deserved"

"Bïtch! I'm suddenly glad he did that now."

"Of course" He chuckles, but be suddenly turns serious "I don't want to ever go through that again Foxie, feeling like you're taking my best chance at survival away from me, like if it's not you its nothing. Like oxygen doesn't exist if it isn't you. Like- pain, bolts of it."

I don't say anything because I don't know what to say, because I remember myself spiraling down, drowning and never resurfacing.

And hurt. Just repetitive hurt over and over again

I hold on to his forearm, and we stare at each other I smile and so does he so it's okay.

*************

house, like I'm a kid or something. This was the last thing I expected, i am grown woman. I don't need toys.

What gave him this fücking bright idea that I would love this.

I spot a live size spongebob and sprint away from him, towards the section and grab it.

OH MY GODDDD! I can sleep on him, especially when I'm having a day day, he would be the most comfy bed in the world.

A woman you say?

I can be a woman and appreciate spongebob you bitch

This put your whole Alpha female persona in flames! It doesn't even have dïck!

Excuse you! Spongebob is very manly and macho! You're just plain stupid and insensitive and you can suck my anus!

I-

I'm you bitch!

"I'm not sure I enjoy your affection towards inanimate objects. Special this son of a stuffed animal bïtch Spongebob." He calls out behind me, both hands in his pockets

"WHAT!!!! You're the bïtch and don't ever call him that"

He grins as if he remember something, and he brushes his thumb on the conner of his mouth nodding "Of course"

"What are you thinking about?"

"Come with me Foxie." He completely ignores my questions. "Well of course if you'ld like him to sit with us while we eat"

I shrug "I wouldn't, can i sit on his face?"

"He'll absolutely be in shreds if you did that, but you can sit on mine" He grins tugging me out of the section and into a completely different room.

The vast difference from the child like setting to this is beautiful.

I smile.

Then i pull away from him and move to this chandelier wine rack. It made out of pure glass, yet it looks like champagne crystal

Theres a large breakfast bar by the side with a mini bar.

Fairy lights underscores the high ceilings so it looks so magical.

Theres a large sofa with a table right in front of it, the table is already set for two.

"It's so pretty" I whisper.

He's behind me and he turns me around to look at him. I don't know why he just stares me.

"Come" He tugs my hand pulling me to the bar. I watch him start to mix and he has taken off his coat. His dog tags and cuban glint in the fairy lights.

He has pulled his shirt sleeves to his elbow, so his tattoo ripples out, and covers his exposed chest. It makes me want to lick his skin then press my lips to everything part of his body

Because lets face it, this man is delicious.

I squeeze my thighs together in discomfort.

"I take it you like fücking me with your eyes?"

I blink "I was admiring your dog tags and your rings, and you left your hair down I like it."

"Of course, and I know you do" He hands over the glass to me and I quickly take a large sip, smiling into the drink.

He tugs on my wrist to the sofa, i see this large brown box of cards, and he put a tiny spongebob beside the box.

My heart melts and i pick it up.

"You're awfully sweet for an asshole" I grin at him.

"I still have no idea what you see in that guy. Am i going fight against a stuffed animal for you?"

"Of course, we've been together for a while. It's going to take a few adjustments."

He blinks at me then hands me a plate.

"So spongebob or me?"

"Thank you. And spongebob of course, i can cuddle him anytime I want. And he's comfy in between my thighs"

"WHAT! You dry hump a fücking stuffed animal!"

I laugh when i realize how that sounded and the absolute look of horror on his face "No, but i tend to just put him there when I'm on my phone. It's a habit and I definitely don't dry hump stuffed animals. Don't give me ideas. Wow this is really good. What is it?"

He just continues to stare at me and i think he's going to ignore me "Makarony po-flotsky"

He makes everything sound so hot.

I nod unwise swirling my fork "Uh uhn. Hot, I mean fancy it sound fancy. But what kind of pasta is it?"

"Its just Russian pasta with beef mince and my finesse" He say calmly grabbing his fork, and his tattoo fingers wrap around his glass.

Fuvk i wish they'd wrap around my throat. His nails are so clean

I'm such a sucker for yummy neat men.

Specifically if they look like Nikolai.

"You have such good finger... fuck I mean hands" I laugh nervously and take a large sip from my glass to calm myself down. "Good hands yes. You cook really well"

He laughs at me asshole.

But those fingers are so nice inside my püssy.

"You have nice hands regardless and you're a jerk!"

"And your mind is filthy foxie" He nods laughing

"Can you shut up!"

We bicker back and forth over unethical things and I haven't felt so carefree, comfortable and happy like this ever.

It's always individually

"Do you know how to play Durak?" He ask me now that we're done eating.

"What's that?"

"It's a card game, a Russian card game?" He specifies.

I don't know how to, so he explains it. He's occasionally slipping into his Russian thang and correcting himself

And it's fun watching how cute he is wanting to play the card with me. He said he used to play it when he Shawn and his other brothers/Friends Cam and Vex were still kids.

"I want to ask you something?" He says in the middle of the game

So far I'm losing.

"Go ahead"

"This ex, Damien Malik who is exactly to you?"

I chew on my lips, hearing his precise control to be calm in his tone and seeing it in his body language

"He is not my ex. We never dated"

"What! But it's all over the internet. I've seen tons of videos of fan proving the truthfulness of it, talking about matching outfits at different events, buying jewelries, and one of the ring on your fingers is a promise ring from him? That you moved in together once"

I laugh because I've actually seen the video and fans are actually crazy and very creative.

"Damien was like my best friend until i found out he has feelings for me. His management thoughts it was a good idea to lead on the fans to sell my merch hence the matching clothes. He did give me a ring but I don't wear it. Aside that even our friends is deteriorating. I can't exactly say what we are"

He nods, rolling my word in his head and studying my features

"Okay. But you've known each other a while"

"Yes, yes we have"

"But..." He nods again looking directly into my eye "You guys have been intimate before haven't you"

My cheeks burn and i break his gaze momentarily before looking at him again "Yes, he's touched me intimately. I don't know i was confused because we were close and I thought i liked him"

"And are you sure you don't?"

"Nikolai.....?"

My phone rings altering my response and I plan to ignore it, it's closer to him and he pick up my phone. I watch his body tense, he looks directly at me through his lashes making my heart beat taster and my body warms.

I feel like he can resd my soul

"Here"

I accept the phone

It's Damien calling

Shit!

What the fûck!