This room was only getting colder, maybe it was just in my head but it felt like -500 degrees in here. I hugged the quilt tighter but slowly my hand loosened its grip. I was shaking again, my grip was super weak. I'd almost forgotten it was that time of the month again, medication time.

I got up but decided to take a shower first, I like the shower because it was the little time I had to be warmer than I felt. I tied my hair in a messy bun and shrugged on a sweater. I wore tights and uggs. The paparazzi would love an eyeful of this.

I walked out and went to the bedside table where I kept the pills, there wasn't a glass of water to go with it. I felt a pang in my heart as I realised every time Dominic would've already put water there, that's why I've never had to get it myself. I take medication almost mindlessly, not realising the little things or even that I'm doing it. I put the meds back but decided to take out the two I was supposed to take – out of the packet, so that I don't get called up for not taking it.

I threw the two pills into the small bin near the armchairs, like I was playing a basketball game and it was fun. I don't want to take his medication if he's not going to give me more than that, all he's got. I may be selfish but I'm the one doing him a favour if I recall correctly.

I put in studs in each of my ear piercings, I hadn't worn earrings in all the holes for a while – I was getting scared it would close.

I hopped downstairs, completely changing my manner. I didn't want Claire to think I didn't want to be around her, I wanted to be happy to be in her workplace – she was really passionate about working there.

"You're here!" she beamed from the door, "We were starting to think you weren't going to show." She grabbed my arm.

"Oh." Was my genius reply.

"You're late." Abrielle was standing beside the car, Claire waved her off as they watched me enter the car.

"Sorry." I smiled as everyone shuffled in their seats, Clarissa was last as she came out and climbed into the car. She was looking really pretty in a royal blue dress, navy coat and dark blue Louboutin heels. Her brown hair was curled and in waves down her back and shoulders, they even bounced as she walked.

"You look really pretty today." I commented, I was envious. I'd put zero effort in, I was going to make Dominic look bad if I go out like this.

"You want to go back in and change?" Sophie put a hand on my shoulder, I realised everyone was dressed pretty high-end.

My pride was too big, "No." I replied decidedly but turned to Claire, "Unless you think it would be wise."

"It would be wise." Claire replied hesitantly. I rolled my eyes jumping out, already with an outfit in mind.

I was back on the plane sending a message to Marcello, letting him know I'd be coming back to New York briefly and would be dropping in. I needed to check something in my old apartment, then head over to Amara's to double check her place too. I had an itching feeling Vince came back here and was hanging around. It would be extremely disturbing if he was staying in there, if he'd taken some of her stuff. He is a psychopath after all.

So I would visit Vitiello Industries while I'm at it.

I exited off the plane and successfully made it out of the airport, without being spotted by the paparazzi. They had no idea I'd left my house so I wouldn't be surprised. I got out of the taxi at the front of my apartment building, it didn't look as bright as it used to. I rode the elevator to the top level and pushed the door open, it wasn't even locked.

Ransackers had no respect.

I walked in and got straight to business, ignoring the nagging voice in my head that listed all the expensive things I could see were missing. I went to the main bathroom and opened the door, no one had touched this room at all. I walked around looking along the wall for a carving then spotting it on the top left corner of the shower wall.

9 angels dead.

Geez, thanks for including me. If I recall correctly I killed eleven and there was twenty of them. Should've just wrote twenty.

--

I caught a taxi and got out in front of Vitiello Industries.

Heads were turning as I entered the building, it was as if I'd never left – nothing was different and I was grateful. I was sceptical Marcello would've changed the entire design of the place but it was still exactly how I'd left it.

"Dominic." He came smiling before I'd even passed the double doors to his office entrance, "You're just in time. I'm about to head to this meeting and they're totally not expecting you."

"Great, because I'm not going in."

"Hey," he put a hand on my shoulder, can't believe this slacker is touching me, "The assistant chick you hired just up and left a while ago, so we've been having some problems with the sh-t that's happening here."

"I'll fix it." I replied, he went to leave but stopped when I began speaking again, "Oh, and Marcello? If someone leaves, just hire someone else." I told him as I walked into the office. This guy had been f-cking up my company for months.

I was now wearing a champagne sweater that I paired with a black skirt and a pointy pair of peach Louboutin pumps, I left my hair out and grabbed a purse.

"See?" Claire gestured towards me as I re-entered the car, "She looks stunning."

"I regret nothing." I joked, finding joy in being able to amuse her. I sat in my seat and the car took off, the usual trio - a car in front and a car behind.

We sat in silence for the most part but soon broke into conversation about Victoria Secret model life, I knew nothing but I learnt a lot.

"Just do it, its not that big a change to the routine you have now anyways." Claire pleaded, "Plus Clarissa is going to do it. We'll give the both of you recommendations!"

I shook my head. "I am not a runway model, no thanks." I put a hand in front of her face, she hit it back into my lap.

"Fine," she huffed, "We'll see if you still feel that way after today. Tonight all the models from work are invited to a party in the city. We live here, but most of the models don't. So we're going to accompany them to the party so they can experience a real italian gathering."

"Cool." I replied watching the shops we passed.

"So thats what we're doing later. We'll go shopping super quick after Abrielle and Sophie are finished with their shoot."

"Cool." I replied as we pulled up in front of a large building with steps leading up to glass doors, you could see from here the number of well-dressed men and women ran around the place. I ignored the paparazzi waiting for people to enter or leave the building, holding their cameras as if any moment a celebrity would whoosh past. There were people on the inside carrying shapes much bigger than them, people pushing around lights on wheels and even food being rolled around on a table. I was going for the food.

"You didn't tell me you had food here." I whispered leaving a steam mark on the window from my being too close.

Claire chuckled, "Obviously, we don't starve ourselves you know."

"Cool." I breathed, she tapped my shoulder so I would get off the window and a suited man opened it from the other side. I smiled apologetically as I got out, everyone else followed and we all headed inside. So many paparazzi were snapping photos of us, I could barely see.

Once we got inside people took our bags and coats, we were met by the girls' manager and she started taking us to the set of their shoot. There was a lot happening in one place, there was different sets everywhere - at least two other shoots were already taking place. Abrielle and Sophie were led away as soon as we reached the set, their's was about to become number three.

We sat on one of the couches and watched things happen, Claire explained all the things to me. The people and what they did, the places where the photos were sent and the prints they already had being carried around by men wearing black polo shirts and dress pants. She took me to a desk where each photo of the model being shot showed up on the screen, there was a lot and all I could think about was how frustrating it was going to be sorting out all those windows. Minimising and closing each one separately...

Computers stress me out. That's why I'm not in intelligence and thats why I don't have a phone. Or is that because Dominic took it?

I hadn't realised the things I've been doing or letting go, that normal mafia women would do or let go. He'd taken my phone and I'd dealt with it - unknowingly of course, but he'd stuck me with guards and I'd let that go too. I was a legit mafia woman, but with a few exceptions.

He took my phone god damn it.

"And this is the part you've been waiting for," Claire stepped back, "The food." She droned as if this buffet table was the most uninteresting thing she'd ever laid her eyes on. But she's not me.

"Eee!" I squealed. "Am I allowed to eat it?"

"Yep, you're a celeb too."

I frowned, "Only celebrities can have some?"

"Pretty much, the crew has their own table."

"That is..." I looked for the word, "So sad." I exaggerated the 'so' so she would understand how wrong that was, I thought that only happened in movies.

"You want to eat at the crew table?" Claire raised a brow, I held a finger up as I finished chewing the mini Sweet potato bite I'd shoved into my mouth.

"I'll eat at both thank you." I answered before shoving another - which was ready to go - into my mouth too. She groaned turning to check on the set which Abrielle and Sophie were now jumping around on, I watched from where I stood. There was no way I was leaving this table.

Where was that crew table again?

--

"You so obviously only came for the food." Claire complained. We were sitting in the car once again, on our way to the shopping centre and I was almost 100% sure the paparazzi were following.

"Nah uh. I didn't know there was food until we got there." I pouted.

"You must be bloated." Clarissa commented followed by a snicker from Sophie. I shook my head with a smirk.

"I have abs. You don't bloat when you actually work out." I stated. Or maybe I just didn't bloat, but why stop myself from encouraging exercise?

"Right." Claire muttered.

We pulled up to the shopping centre, which to my surprise wasn't too far from the building we were just at. We got out of the car only to be greeted by cameras once again.

I was right.

We used our hair for cover and walked into the shopping centre, paparazzi never went into the actual building because they could be fined or forced to leave. The whole thing is very legally troubling.

We began our lengthy searches for dresses, I knew secretly each of us wanted to find the best dress so that the others wouldn't look as good as we did. So whenever someone found a dress that they thought was the best, they'd claim it and show it off to the rest of us. Then we would see it, get jealous and spend even longer trying to find something that will top it. And so whoever finds their dress first is usually the one that doesn't look as stunning, in some aspect.

I think we all end up looking amazing.

We entered different shops, all going to different sections and hurriedly rushing through each rack. I only rushed because I wanted to leave, the tension was too much when everyone so clearly wanted to look better than the rest. This party they spoke of was going to be a huge media event, so many pictures would be taken and posted to the internet. Meaning it would be the buzz for a while, you have to make it count.

Not to mention the fact that we don't go out much, this will the first and last photos of us - especially me - that they'll get for a long time. I'm curious on whether or not Dominic will see us, he isn't much of a media person. He doesn't really care.

We all finally found our dresses - thank god - and were on our way to put them on and get our faces made. What a day it's been. Constant rushing all the time, I definitely didn't want to be a model. As an agent I do things at my own pace, if people get upset about it then its their problem. No one wants to start a fight they can't win.

--

We all emerged from the limousine that had picked us up. "We're only outside and already this music is too loud." I heard Abrielle whine, Claire shook her head beside me. We tugged up our dresses and headed inside.

Let's get this party over with.

I'd almost forgotten how accessible I was when in an office, up until the assistant walked up with an iPad in her hand.

"I thought you'd want see this. She is your business isn't she?" she put the device down in front of me. It was an article by some page called 'E! News'. There was a number of pictures of Amara, Clarissa, my sister and Abrielle along with a couple of other girls - going about their day. They looked to be doing fine, I was glad no one was taking my little disappearing act too seriously.

"Thanks..." I paused.

She smiled, "Sierra."

"Sierra." I finished.

She turned and left, I got back to work. I'd have to spend at least one more day just to get everything back on track, then I think I'd be well overdue my welcome.