I wake up this morning with a lot on my mind. It's been two months since the incident and I've healed but I still have very sore moments. I got up looking out the window seeing that yet again Jaylen is gone. It shouldn't matter to me because he's not my man. The last month he has been distant. It seems the better I get, the more he stayed away.

I walked downstairs to eat breakfast alone again. I was becoming use to it. As I sat down after cooking grill cheese and sausage sandwich, pretty much a melt with my twist, grits, eggs, and a strawberry banana smoothie, I got a text from Nia telling me she needed help getting ready for her date and she would be at Ty's house in an hour or so. She said something else happened and they were leaving early but she would tell me later.

I stood up once I was done eating, and washed the pots and dishes I used, then dried them out, then put them all back where they belong, then cleaned the stove and counter tops off.

I was still in my matching coral colored lace bra and panty set when I finally checked the clock, and I noticed it was about two o'clock. I slipped on some jeans, and a white shirt and slipped on my flip flops.

I went through the side door that leads to Ty's house, as I arrived I knocked, and Nia opened the door she was still in her school clothes. I followed her upstairs to the guest room that she sleeps in.

She asked me to find her something for her date. I think it's cute he still finds time for her. My heart feels broken but it shouldn't. I decided I'm going back to school. I have to face my demons and clean out my apartment and terminate my lease.

I'll leave the furniture for the students who need it. I just want to move past this part of my life. I will be back in time to present my paper, the topic is family. It's been a hard one to write but also a great one. Reminded me of how great my mom was. Blood didn't need to make her my mom. She has been since I was six months old.

Nia came out the bathroom and I had laid her outfit out for her which consisted of black tights a white tank rob and a jean cutting down which she left open but tied at the bottom. With a nice four inch two strap heel. It was simple but she was rocking it to the max.

"Nia, I'm so ready to go home" I said hoping she she would be excited, but she brushed it off and said we would talk later. I hug her and kissed her and left to head back to Jay house.

As I walk in just as expected he's not here. I walk upstairs to the guest room. I moved into it like a month ago. If he noticed he didn't say anything. I know he's sexually frustrated but I'm not tryna go there right now. As much as he sets my soul on fire, I don't know, I just feel like he's not attracted to me, and it is as I suspected it was. It was just a hero and damsel in distress type of thing.

I walked to my room and went to closet pulling out two different bags. I took one and packed it with all my underwear and t shirts and shorts, things I like to lounge around the house in. The next one I packed was my bath stuff, and hair care products. I don't do make up, I really didn't have to pack that. I then grab another one and started with my closet. I didn't realize how many clothes of mine Nia brought over here. Like I was moving in OR something.

I was making my third trip when I heard the front door. I knew he was gone. I turned on love - Kendrick Lamar ft zacari

It seem to send a message I refuse to put myself on the line and say. I heard him go to his room and so I begin putting my bags in my car that Nia brought also. Her and Ty have been great. Even though I haven't gone anywhere if I needed or wanted I was set. After putting three duffle bags in I then went and started packing my jewelry in my tote when Jay walked in. I honestly had to energy to fight. My heart ached for him and I felt he had already left the building, you feel me.

"LaNyiah, where the fuck are you going? " Jay asked I didn't even look his way I just made sure I had everything

"I'm going home. I'm healed now and you're not here anyway. I have a whole house." I continued the conversation as I walked out to my car and placed the bag in car. Only to be turned around and pinned to it. I looked up into the his sexy ass face; that which I have missed.

"Bae please, I'm sorry okay. " Jay said. Like how you gone apologize? Does he even know why? "Jay, I miss my house and you've been handling business it's no reason for me to still be here. And I'm going back to school next week. You wouldn't miss me anyway. YOURE NOT EVEN HERE!!!!" I yelled catching him off guard and myself too. Why am I even mad, ugh

"Nae, baby, please." I cut him off getting out. Of his grasp

"

Jay, it's okay. You're a business man, and I won't get in the way of yours business. I'm not saying go to hell, even though I probably should, I'm just saying bae I'm going home see you later." I said looking at him as he walked up on me. "Bae, I want you here with me. It feels good coming home knowing my girl here." He said as he stepped closer and kissed me

God, how I've missed those lips, his arms, and his voice, but I'll be damned if I'ma be a idiot. I'm sure he got hoes. And guess what; I sure won't be one of them. Let me take my overly horny ass home right now before I can't stop myself from falling; I can feel my twat coming unglued along with my sense, as I pulled away.

"Text me sometimes." I said to Jaylen getting my car and driving off.

I am figuratively scream Fuuuuuck!!! In my head right now. "Like how the fuck did I let this happen. I was at the trap I've been there a lot lately. I know I was neglecting her but damn part of it was business, the other part was tryna get my head together. My people been saying I'm slipping.

I'm always under my girl. Once she got better I started back on my grind, and school. I know she does online classes but I was still going to actual class.

Tonight I went home thinking there would be food as always. There was none. I just figured she was sleep but the I hear music. I know she heard the door close. I went to my room to shower. What happened tonight wasn't supposed to. This bitch tried to drug a nigga. Me and my boys had to body her and her dude. I've been Tryna catch them all month, but didn't know how she was until tonight.

I should have talked to Nae and not ignore her. I love her I swear to Goodness, with all of me I care about her more than myself. I gotta fix it. But how, that's the big question. I paced the floor for an hour and half. Thinking out loud, throwing shit, praying, cussing, thinking more. I needed to call Ty but he's on a date. Maybe that's what I need to do. Hell yeah a date it is. But Nia gonna have to help a nigga, Ty too.

Fuck this, I grabbed my keys hopped in my hummer and headed to my lady house. I already got a key and I know the gate code. She has a key to my crib to so it's just right. I finally arrived and pulled in the drive way. I sat there getting my thoughts together. I need her to hear me with her stubborn ass. That's one thing I love about her, she's gives a great fight.

I finally got out the car and walked to the door and put the key in. I listened and didn't hear any music so I knew she wasn't in her room. I walked into the living room and I heard faint music. I followed it and looked out the back door and saw Nae swimming. My dick instantly got hard. I removed everything but my boxers and walked down to the pool where she was

Once I reached home I instantly changed clothes and got into my white one piece swim suit. I tried on three before I said fuck it because no one is here.

I grabbed my waterproof wireless earphones and grabbed my phone. I put on Pandora before getting in the pool. I slowly got in as our pool is heated and it felt so good I wanted to take my time. Once I was down to my chest I turned on my phone and set it on the side of the pool. I decided I didn't wanna deal with the earphones and just Bluetoothed it to the outside system we had set up.

I was swimming and thinking. I swam to the side of the pull where there were built in lounge chairs in two ft. I was chilling thinking about Jaylen, it seems he's always on my damn mind. I just can't seem to get him out of my damn system. I'm not sure if I want him out or not, not even sure I want him in. I was zoned out on music till someone touched me.

I jumped because it scared the shit outta me. But calmed down because it could only be three other people. Nia, Ty, or, Jayeln

"Dammit Jaylen, what the fuck do you want?" I said raising my voice, and sitting up. "Baby listen to me. I love you. You my girl, ion like when we at odds." Jaylen said looking in my eyes. "When? When did we have a discussion about me being your girl?." I asked, you we all know he already have me, but I just need to hear it for myself. "Baby, you been mine, since I saw you, since I killed for you, since I tasted you." Jaylen said kissing up my leg

"You don't mean it." I said removing my leg from his grasp as I try to walk away, but I was stopped by Jayen.

He didn't say anything, he looked at me and I saw love and hella of a lot of lust in his eyes. My cheeks became red and my core was throbbing, and then he kissed me.

He kissed me like he would never see me again. Like I would fade away from his sight. I couldn't help but to kiss him back with just as much passion, As he picked me up which made me wrap my legs around his waist, where I felt him, and I do mean all of him. He was hot and thick, he grinded into me and I felt as if I would burn up alive deep down inside. As his hands roamed up, and down my body; then he slowly began to remove my swim suit. He pulled it down around my waist, next he started to lick, and kiss my breast, then began to suck on my nipples. Which drove me crazy, as I moaned uncontrollably, and threw my head back.

He was doing something to my body and I was enjoying every moment of it.

He stopped, and I grew mad. Like nigga, you ignore me, then you come up in here getting me all hot and bothered, then you gone stop all of a sudden. Mane I wanted to slap the taste out of his mouth at this very moment.

"Chill MA, trust I'm not leaving you hanging. You feel him. He needs you." Jay said

"I need him too." I moaned.

"I need you more Jay." I said looking into his eyes.

"You already got me." Jay replied as he lifted me out of the pool, and went to a sitting area. He laid me down, while pulling the bathing suit all the way off. He was looking at me so hard, that I begin to feel a little bit insecure, that I covered my self up as much as possible with my hands, and crossed my legs.

Pandora began to play

"Nae, I'll tie your ass up if I have to. Don't cover my body baby. You sexy as fuck to me, you always have been and forever will be." Jay said so sweetly as he kept looking at me in my eyes.

I removed my hands as he kissed from my ankles, all the way up my thighs, then he began to spread my legs, looking at my treasure, before he leaned down and I felt his warm breath. It was so much better than the first time. He stuck his tongue into my treasure and began to swirl his tongue inside my box, with out warning, he then began to tongue fuck me, making my body come back to back.

"Mmmm, shit Jaylen!!!" I moaned as I tried to run, but it definitely wasn't working. I came again, and then kissed me sliding it in slowly. He was so huge; I felt like I was going to die at any moment. He wiped tears, I didn't know I had.

"You want me to stop ma?" Jay asked. "No, I want you." I moaned out as he moved his hips back and forth. "I love you Nae." He said making love to me. "I love you too Jay, oh shit you feel so good." I moaned in his ear as I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist.

"Hell naw, my pussy feel better. You mine for life now." Jay said unwrapping my left leg; lifting it over his right shoulder, as I threw my head back while he speeded up.

"Mmm." Nae moaned, it was the best feeling in the world. I knew right then and there, I loved him to the point of no return. I had fought it long enough, and I was tired of fighting. As the song ended we came together. And then another song came on but we were too wrapped up into each other. He loved me for another three hours; until we both came for the last time, of that morning.

He fell asleep on my chest, still inside me, with my legs, and arms wrapped around him falling asleep happy and at peace, at last.

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Welll well well. Your thoughts? Hope you enjoy. Please follow play list instructions lol. Love you all