09/15/2017

Kristin almost asked if she could come. If it weren't for the fact that she had a lot of packing to do, she wanted to tag along. She was curious to see how they'd handle the rogues, even though wolves would be involved and she lacked in that area.

As she absently threw clothes into her bag, her mind was on the rogues. Usually they weren't a serious threat to packs but they did cause unnecessary problems.

It was different though because Nightfall had just went through so much, Ryder had just become the Alpha. Couldn't they just leave them alone?

A knock on the door snapped her out of her thoughts and her father walked in.

"How's the Luna doing?" he smiled and she returned his hug.

"I'm okay," Kristin shrugged, hiding her hesitation with a cough.

"I talked with Ryder," her father looked down at her, "I know you have not been doing much with the pack."

He said it lightly but Kristin scrunched her brows, "Is that what Ryder said?"

He shook his head, "Kristin, I am going to give you some advice. Things will get much better once you meet your pack."

"I know," she sighed, "Its just intimidating."

"You won't think that once you meet them, Kris. That's what the Luna's introduction to the pack is for-- so both the pack and the Luna can meet each other and establish the proper relationship the pack needs."

Kristin knew he was right, the only thing was that she wasn't ready to be marked and that usually had to be done before she met the rest of the pack.

She sighed, voicing her worry to her father.

"I know this is a lot for you Kristin, but it's time to put focus on the good of your pack."

"Did Ryder tell you to say this?" Kristin accused her father.

He shook his head.

"I know he told you so you could try and convince me," she frowned.

"Kristin," her father said her name firmly, "I can tell you are not marked without having to ask Ryder."

Kristin sat down, getting angry at Ryder for telling her father about her postponing her introduction to the pack, and at the same time worrying about what was taking so long for him to get back.

"Look Kris," her father's voice softened, "Even though you should let Ryder mark you before you meet your pack, there is a way to show you are taken without him having to mark you."

"Wait, what?" she asked, curiously.

"Ryder will let you know," he nodded, "I just want you to start taking over the Luna's responsibilities, Kris. Once you do, you will feel more like you belong and you will realize your pack will respect you for you. You don't have to be intimidated by them. If anything, they should be intimidated by you," he smiled and ruffled her hair.

"Okay, I get it," she ducked out of reach, chuckling.

After her father left, Kristin had time to think about everything.

Everything as in the Luna's responsibilities.

Kristin knew this would be harder as a human, even though her mother was a human Luna.

No matter how much she tried to convince herself otherwise, she really wasn't ready to meet Nightfall. What if they didn't like her? What if some of Rickard's followers were still out there, waiting for a chance to 'meet' her?

She also knew that no matter what the other way to show the sign she was taken was, Ryder would want her to just be marked. That's why he obviously never told her there was another way.

And then there was the Luna's responsibilities. Visiting the pack members, making sure they were all protected and safe. Making sure her and Ryder made the right decisions for the rest of the pack.

Tears stung her eyes when she realized she was panicking again. What was wrong with her?

She sat back down on her bed and wiped away her tears of frustration. Why couldn't she just be normal? Why couldn't she just be a perfect werewolf Luna that hadn't been kidnapped by her own pack's previous Alpha? Why did she have to see her own pack's Alpha murder innocent people? His own son?

Her chest was tightening and she was trying to remember how to breathe when she heard a faint, "What's wrong?"

She jumped at the sound of Ryder's voice, glancing up at him as he entered her room.

"How did it go?" Kristin asked, momentarily distracted.

Ryder turned towards her window, "We didn't catch them," he muttered, annoyed.

Kristin watched him clench his jaw, "Something else happened?" she wondered, seeing his annoyance.

He took a deep breath, turning to look at her.

"Tell me," Kristin said when he didn't reply.

"It's probably not a good time to do that."

"Why?" she asked, wishing he would just say it.

"Because you're crying," he pointed out, nodding at her.

She quickly wiped away any remaining tear, "No I'm not."

"Are you okay?" he asked with concern.

Kristin closed her eyes and struggled to take a deep breath to calm down, "I'm fine."

"Kristin," he gave her a flat look.

"Just tell me."

Ryder shook his head, making her angry. "Can't you trust that I think it's best if I tell you later rather than at this exact moment?"

"You promise you'll tell me later when I ask?" she gave him a pointed look.

He sighed, "Yes."

"It's that bad, is it?" she asked, wanting to know now rather than later.

Her thoughts developed into every bad situation that could have possibly happened. There were so many possibilities--

"Kristin, breathe," Ryder sat down next to her to face her.

She tried evening out her breathing, she really did. However, she was only becoming more upset at the fact that she was freaking out.

"I would if it wasn't impossible," she muttered.

"What's wrong?" Ryder asked, trying to figure out what was bothering her so much.

"Everything," he heard her mumble as she hid her face behind her hands.

She mostly meant that her anxiety was getting worse and she was starting to panic more frequently but she had no idea why and that alone made her anxious and upset, but she remained quiet.

"Just calm down, Kristin."

"Telling me to calm down isn't going to help," she stood up and started to pace. How was she supposed to help lead a pack of hundreds of werewolves if she panicked over everything?

"If you tell me what's wrong I can help," Ryder said with frustration.

"I just need space," she mindlessly spoke and continued pacing. If she was having these episodes more often it was just going to get worse. And then what? Would she have to--

"You were alone and had space when I walked in but you were still like this," he replied, "Tell me what's wrong."

Kristin walked over to her window, focusing on the trees that had started to change color.

"You said you'd open up," she heard Ryder say.

"I said I'd try but its hard," she snapped, her anxiety affecting her mood. She normally wasn't like this, but when she started panicking, it was like her breathing was getting cut short and suddenly she felt like the room she was in was closing in on her and felt claustrophobic and her thoughts were jumbled into worries and she didn't know how to stop it.

"Come here," Ryder sighed.

She shook her head, staying by the window.

"Kristin," he demanded, the same Alpha tone her father used in Ryder's voice.

She crossed her arms and walked over to him, "What?"

Before she could react to what was happening he pulled her down to sit on his lap.

"What are you doing?" she said with annoyance, looking down to see her straddling his waist.

Their proximity was distracting her momentarily of her worry.

"If you tell me what's stressing you out I can help you," he said, smirking at her reaction to him.

"I'm not stressed," she heard herself say as her focus shifted to his eyes watching her. It was the worst lie she had ever told.

Ryder snorted, "Mhmm, that's why I can feel it on you?"

"What? You can feel my stress?" Kristin asked, snapping from her daze.

"When it's really bad, yes. And it's really annoying so can you let me fix it?"

"You can't fix it," she sighed.

"Is it because you're moving in with me?"

"No," she almost laughed. If only that was her only worry.

He squinted at her, confused at her smile.

She sighed, her body slightly relaxing in his hold.

"Is it because--"

"I know what you said to my father," she interrupted, remembering why she was originally angry at him.

"What did I say?" he shook his head.

"You told him I'm not ready for the Luna introduction and now he's trying to convince me to go through with it and take over the Luna's responsibilities."

"Did you think that if he told me I should that I would listen and suddenly be ready?" she continued when he was quiet.

"That's why you're upset?" he asked, sounding like he figured it out.

"No, there's a million other reasons why I'm stressed out but that's why I'm mad at you."

"You're mad at me now?"

"I've been," she snapped, causing his lips to twitch upwards.

"It's not funny," she struggled to get put of his hold but he wouldn't let her.

"Kristin, I told you we can wait until you're ready."

"Then why did you have to tell my father about it?" she exclaimed.

"Because he asked about it and I told him the truth?" he said, confused at her anger.

"But you thought that would--"

Ryder stopped her from talking with his lips.

Kristin struggled to make herself pull away, "No, you can't do this whenever we argue," she frowned.

"But you're so funny when you're mad," he chuckled, making her scrunch her brows.

"No I'm not, you need to be serious--"

"And hot."

"What did you just say?" she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Nothing."

She glared at him, wishing she could put some distance between them and stay mad.

"You're so annoying," she said before leaning in so he could kiss her again.

She felt him smirk against her lips and she angrily kissed him back.

After a couple of seconds, she felt Ryder leaning back and bringing her on top of him without breaking the kiss.

This wasn't good.

But it felt really good at the same time.

Instead she focused on the feeling of her leaning on his chest, and she ran her hand through his dark hair, smiling because she always wanted to do that.

Ryder's hands grabbed her waist and moved her to the side, momentarily breaking the kiss to let her catch her breath and so he could move on top of her.

Kristin knew she would be the one having to stop this when their lips connected again. She really had to...

Her hands moved between them, pressing on his chest.

What was she doing again?she thought as she felt his muscular chest over her.

Ryder trailed his lips from her mouth, down to her neck.

Oh, right.

She shoved on his chest for him to get up.

"What?" she heard Ryder grumble in her ear.

"My parents are downstairs," she whisper- yelled, out of breath.

"Oh, right," he picked himself up, still leaning over her.

"Did you hear me?" she raised her brows.

"But do you feel better?" he asked, looking down at her.

"What?" she asked, watching him smirk.

Yeah, she had been too focused on what they had been doing to stress, but she wasn't going to admit it.

"You're welcome," Ryder teased, probably guessing he was right.

"Get off me," she pushed on his chest again, making him roll his eyes.

A couple minutes later they both walked out of her room and headed downstairs.

"Kristin?" she heard a familiar voice as she turned the corner into the living room.

"Marcus!" she exclaimed, surprised to see him sitting on the couch, "I haven't seen you in forever!"

Marcus chuckled but his gazed focused behind her, to Ryder.

"I can finally meet my sister's mate," he nodded at her.

Oh, right.

Kristin turned around and saw that Ryder was actually grinning.

"Ryder this is--"

"Long time no see, Marcus," he interrupted her introductions.

"It's been forever," her brother replied, returning the grin.

Kristin furrowed her brows, turning back around to face Marcus.

"Wait, you guys already know each other?"

•. •. •. •. •.

Chapter Thirty Eight!

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