"Hey, Daddy?"

"Yes Ji- I mean Yoon- I mean Hob- I mean, ugh." Namjoon groaned, massaging his forehead with his thumb and index finger. "Yes, Jimin?"

"I'm Taehyung."

"Yes, Taehyung? What is it?"

"Who is Daddy's favorite?" Tae asked, grinning sloppily, and Namjoon chuckled.

"Of course, it's y-" Namjoon started to say out of instinct, but then all of the other children, who had apparently heard the question, raced over.

"I'm your favorite, right?!" Hobi yelled, spinning and almost tripping and falling on the carpeting.

"I'm the prettiest so I should be the favorite," Jin reasoned wisely, nodding slowly.

"I'm everybody's favorite," Yoongi deadpanned. "Everybody loves me."

"I want...I want to be a favorite," Jimin whispered, looking down at his feet, which were clad in bright orange socks.

"Favorite?" Jungkook mumbled, pointing to himself. "Me?"

Namjoon laughed nervously. "You're all my-"

"We can't all be your favorite," Jin said, blinking and tilting his head. "Favorite is slinglular."

"Singular."

"Singular," Jin automatically corrected, still nodding. "It means that there's just one. Not a lot. So, not six. Just one. Otherwise it would be favorites, with an s because adding an s makes something plural, which means more than one. So which one is your favorite?" Jin asked, trying really hard and over-enunciating because he wanted to show his daddy what he was learning in class and make him proud.

Namjoon smiled and patted Jin on the head for his effort, and Jin hugged Namjoon's leg, snuggling into him.

"Cheating!" Tae cried out, pointing at Jin. "Cheater cheater pumpkin eater!"

"No," Hobi said, looking at Tae with his tiny hands on his hips. "It's cheater cheater potato eater."

"Why is it always potatoes?" Namjoon wondered aloud.

"No! It's pumpkin!"

"Potato!"

"Pumpkin!"

"Does it really matter?" Yoongi asked, frowning and glaring at Jin. "He's still cheating."

They all turned back to glare at Jin.

"No fair!" Tae yelled, stamping his foot.

Jimin was still looking down at the ground, mumbling under his breath. "Favorite? Can I? Be a favorite? Am I somebody's favorite? I want to be somebody's favorite..."

Namjoon felt bad and leaned forward, scooping Jimin up in his arms and sitting Jimin down in his lap, letting his arms hold Jimin close to him. "Don't worry," Namjoon whispered in Jimin's ear. "I love you very very very much."

Now everybody stared at Jimin.

"Do you love me very very very much?" Hobi asked, eyes wide.

"You love me very very very very much," Jin said. "That's one more very than you love Jimin. And because there are more than one very, it's plural, right, Daddy?"

Namjoon sighed. "Yes, it's plural, Jin. Well...sort of. It's...confusing-"

"Well, even if you love Jin very very very very very very much," Yoongi began flatly, "you love me most. You love me all the very's."

"No fair!"

Fighting broke out amongst all five of them - Jimin was still sitting in his lap, although he'd turned around so that his face was buried in Namjoon's abdomen - and suddenly, Tae was wrestling with Hobi on the floor, Yoongi was ducking as Jin went to grab his hair, and Jungkook was subtly trying to trip Yoongi from behind.

"Boys!" Namjoon yelled.

They ignored him.

"BOYS!"

They ignored him.

"Stop it THIS INSTANT unless Jin, you want your pink backpack confiscated and Yoongi, you want me to take away your favorite CD and Hobi, you want me to stop driving you to your dance class and Tae, you want me to make you stop watching late night TV shows and Jungkook, you want me to draw bunny ears on all pictures with you in them."

There was a moment of silence as everyone froze, almost like Namjoon had magically hit pause.

Then, "What is confishcated?" Jin asked. "It lives in the water, right?"

"It means to take away."

"Oh. I'll stop."

"Good. Everybody sit down."

All of the kids sat in a neat row in front of Namjoon.

Jimin shifted to look up at Namjoon. "Do I have to stop?" he whispered.

Namjoon fought a smile at Jimin's messed-up hair and shook his head. "You just go back to what you were doing," he instructed, trying to stop himself from fixing Jimin's hair part as Jimin tucked his face back into Namjoon's warmth.

"Now, listen, all of you," Namjoon said, trying to sound stern, but it was hard to be stern when looking at five of the cutest children on Earth. "I love all of you equally, okay? You're all my favorites."

"That's a-"

"Yes, Jin, it's a plural. It's Daddy's turn to talk now, okay?"

"Okay. Sorry, Daddy," Jin said, putting his hand down from when he'd raised it to point out another unnecessary grammar rule.

"You're forgiven." Namjoon made eye contact with each other them. "Do you all understand? I love each of you so much that there isn't a first place or a second place or a sixth place-"

"What happened to second place and third place and fourth place and fifth place?" Tae asked, blinking.

"Yes, those ones too," Namjoon said, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh. Sorry. I forgot," Tae said before holding his thumb and index finger to his lips and drawing them to the right to pantomime zipping his mouth.

"You're forgiven too. What I'm trying to say is that I love you all so much that you can't put numbers on it. I love each of you infinitely, okay? So it's not a competition to see who is the favorite because you're all priceless to me. Got it?"

They nodded.

"Okay, now you kids go run around outside and burn some of that energy," Namjoon instructed, worn out.

They smiled and went outside to play tag or some other pointless game that involved a lot of running and not much else.

"Daddy?" Jimin whispered, the only child still inside.

"Yes, Jiminie?"

"You're my favorite," Jimin whispered before turning his face back into Namjoon's t-shirt and falling asleep.

Namjoon smiled at the little mochi before giving him a kiss on the top of his head and finally fixing his hair.