I lean on my crutch, my 70s hits playlist blasting while my mom rushes around the house, getting ready for work. She runs in and gives me a kiss on the cheek while I make the kids their omelettes.

"Bye, Ma." I give her a reassuring smile that she returns before heading out the door.

I've been living at home for a few days now. Missing Charlie hasn't gotten any easier, but it's good that I have Ryder and Kaz to distract me. I throw all my energy into taking care of them and when I'm not with them, I busy myself with my schoolwork. I did promise Charlie that I would do better. Now is as good a time as ever to make good on that.

Hopefully in a few weeks, he'll calm down and we can talk. I'm not angry anymore, I just miss him. I just want to understand what went wrong.

I hear footsteps behind me and see Kaz entering the kitchen. She smiles at me and hops up on the counter to watch me cook. "So," she prompts.

"So," I repeat and she glares at me. "Have you missed me?"

"Not at all." She smirks. "There was finally no one around to eat all the cookies, so I got them all to myself. It's really a shame you're back."

I ruffle her hair. "I missed you too, kiddo."

She smacks my arm. "Hey! I'm fourteen, don't call me 'kiddo'!"

"Nuh uh," I shake my head. "I'll be callin' you kiddo until you're ninety."

Kaz scoffs. "If I make it to ninety."

"You will." I smirk and flex my muscles. "You've got your big, strong brother to protect you."

She shoves me. "I don't need your protection, bad boy."

"Did you mean badass?"

"We all know you're a softie on the inside," Ryder giggles from behind me. I turn to smile at him.

"Morning, little bro." He loves when I call him my brother, apparently it's validating as fuck, so I do as often as I can.

Ryder grins brightly and hugs me from behind. "Seeing you in the morning never gets old."

"Aw, don't get all sappy on me, you little shit." I nudge him and pull out some plates to serve the omelettes I made everyone. I hand Kaz hers and she snags some extra bacon before running off to the living room and turning on her favorite show.

I hear some vulgar language and chuckle, knowing she's watching something mom wouldn't approve of. She's only fourteen, but her language is just as bad as mine and she's got a hell of an attitude to go with it. Mom says she gets it from me and that I shouldn't enable her, but what's a rebellious big brother for if not for covering for you? At least Ryder's a good kid, despite his aptitude for sass.

"What do you guys want to do today?" I ask, grabbing my plate and sitting down in the living room. Ryder takes his plate and follows.

"Do we have to do stuff?" Kaz asks.

"Yes. I haven't seen you two in months and I demand you hang out with me."

"Who'd wanna hang out with an old man?" Kaz teases and Ryder snickers.

"Twenty-three isn't old. Just you wait."

Ryder nudges Kaz. "Come on, Kaz. He just wants something to do other than draw that boy all day."

I narrow my eyes, instantly defensive. "What boy?"

"The one who covers over fifty percent of your sketchbook." Ryder replies confidently.

I smack him upside the head. "That's for going through my sketchbook, nosy little fucker."

Ryder laughs and rubs his head. "You left it open, I couldn't resist!"

"Who is the boy, anyway?" Kaz asks and my chest tightens.

I can't explain, not right now. Things are so delicate and I don't think I could handle coming out and explaining what happened with Charlie at the same time. I scratch my head, thinking of a suitable lie. "He's, uh, a model and he's been helping me out."

"There's one of you kissing." Ryder raises an eyebrow.

I just shrug. "I needed to learn how to draw intimate moments and I'm the easiest person to draw."

Ryder nods, but he doesn't look like he buys it. Kaz has long since tuned us out.

I let my mind wander back to Charlie. I'll give it one more week, then I'll go back.

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