One day, Mom went to the grocery store while Dad and I stayed in the car. Some guy drove up beside us while we waited and did an absolutely horrible job parking.

Dad had something to say about that.

He rolled down his window, stuck his head out, and said, "Hey, buddy." Once he had the guy's attention, Dad asked, "What's your secret?"

The guy looked around with a confused expression. "What are you talking about?"

"How did you learn to park like such a fucking douchebag? Is it natural? Was it a skill you picked up? Did you take a class at the douchebagery school for parking? Which is it?"

The guy looked down, awkwardly, almost guiltily, before he bolted for the grocery store door.

Dad shouted after him, "Oh, come on, you didn't tell me yet!"