《AWAKEN》92
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herself sitting at the cliff side hours later. She had sat back down but not near the edge like before. She was sitting on a log a little away.
The sound of a stick snapped gained her attention, but she didn't lift her head up. She knew who it was before they made their presence known.
"Mar," It was Poe.
She heard the sound of beeping. He had brought BB-8 to help find her.
Amara lifts her head and looks at the white and orange droid. The droid rolled over to her and rested against her legs while beeping concerned beeps at her.
Amara touched the droid.
"This might not be the right thing to ask, but how are you?" Poe asks her.
Amara looks back at him.
"I- uh," Her voice sounded unsettled, "I'm alive, aren't I?"
Poe frowns.
He didn't like that as an answer.
He walked over and sat down next to her. He wasn't surprised to feel Amara rest her head on his shoulder, even when she was having a nervous breakdown, Amara still found comfort in Poe.
"That fight," Poe sighs, "That fight brought out the worst in you and I."
Amara lifts her head and looks at him.
He wasn't playing around. Poe was coming right out and saying exactly what he was thinking instead of beating around the bush.
"You- You did something incredibly stupid by rushing off like that, Amara. I- I can't believe you- you did that." Poe says, "I- I can't believe you thought letting yourself die would be what was right."
Amara frowns, "You wouldn't have understood," She says.
"Because I'm not a Jedi? Amara, I get it. I get feeling guilty that I'm the one alive and not my friends." He tells her, "I feel guilt that I survived Exegol and not Snap."
Amara watched as Poe stood up.
"He was going to be a damn father," Poe says, "And then he- he blew up in the sky."
Amara looks away.
"I get you had a feeling that doing this was to make what you did on Exegol right. I- I get it, but Amara, you have a right to a life. You- You deserve so much. You've done so much for this galaxy for Force sake." Poe tells her.
Amara looks at her feet, "But- I-," She sighs, "I know it was stupid. I was beyond reckless and shameful to make that choice without giving you a chance to talk me out of it."
Amara looks at him.
"But I- I had to take that chance. I wanted a better future for you. For Orson." Amara stands, "I couldn't let Orson be dead. With how those Force users found us on Tatooine, I- I knew I had to go and end things."
Poe looks at her.
"Like you said it yourself, Poe, Snap was going to be a father. I didn't want more families to suffer, so I decided my option was the right one." She explains.
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"Even if your family suffered." Poe tells her.
Amara had tears in her eyes, "I was willing to do anything to guarantee that you lived."
Poe walks over to her.
"I was going to get myelf killed by Karawn after you died." Poe confesses.
Amara furrows her brows.
"I took your saber. I was willing to let myself be cut down if that was going to come next." Poe says, "Nothing mattered anymore to me."
Amara frowns.
"You were dead." Poe tells her, "You are my whole world."
Poe cups her cheek and looks at her.
"I was willing to give it away to be with you." Poe says.
Amara had tears well up in her eyes.
"B- But Orson?" Amara spoke.
Poe sighs, "I love Orson. I love him like a son. It was- It was just in that moment, I just lost myself in my rage." He says, "I lost myself in my hatred."
Amara reaches out and touched the hand that was cupping her cheek. She stares deeply into his eyes as he does the same thing to her.
"Poe," Amara says.
Poe reached for something in a bag that was around his shoulders. He pulls out the two sabers handles to hand off to Amara.
"Don't give these up," Poe tells her, "You're story isn't over. Don't do something you'll regret."
Amara looks at her sabers.
The handles rested in the palm of her hands. She remembered building them.
"Poe, I-," She stops herself, "I'm not sure I can be who I was before."
Poe kisses the top of her head, "You don't have to be. Just promise me to never give up and to never go off alone."
Amara looks at him.
"Because I'm here with you through it all." Poe says.
Amara gives him a small smile.
"I don't deserve you." She says.
Poe rests his head on top of her head.
"Yes, you do." Poe says.
{A NEW ORDER}
Ahsoka by her ship. The older woman was slipping by, hoping to leave without any unnecessary attention drawn on her.
"Ahsoka," Amara spoke.
Ahsoka seemed taken back by the sudden appearance of Amara. Ahsoka was told after the small ceremony that Lando, Chewie, and Maz had in honor of Freya on Ajan Kloss, that Amara had ran off.
"Amara," Ahsoka faced the younger woman, "Are you alright?"
Amara nods, "I- I'm figuring all that out."
Ahsoka nods.
Amara takes a step closer, "I- I've been thinking about the future. What am I going to do after all this? Will it even matter?"
"You did help save the galaxy." Ahsoka says, "I think you're deserved a break."
Amara shakes her head, "I don't think so. I think there is more I can do." She tells her.
Ahsoka tilts her head, "What else is there to do?"
"Restore the Jedi Order," Amara says.
Ahsoka seemed stunned.
The actual thought, the idea, of the Jedi Order was something that left Ahsoka speechless. She hadn't thought about the Order in years. She hadn't thought of the Jedi Council in many moon cycles. It was in the past.
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"I have my own plans for it, however, I do not want to force children into it at such a young age. I don't want to kidnap children." Amara says, "I- I want people to feel like they can come freely and learn control."
Ahsoka listened.
"I want them to make the choice. I want them to have that freedom." Amara says, "I want them to know that feelings are important. Emotions aren't weak and don't make us weak. I want them to understand emotions like love, happiness, sadness, and hatred."
Ahsoka watched as Amara spoke with such spirit and pride.
"I don't want the idea of negative feelings leading to the dark side. We all have these feelings, but aren't evil. If we cross the line of what is good and what's not, then we are no longer in the light. But- But rage and hatred, is not that." Amara says.
Ahsoka had a small smile, "I assume you'd be teaching them how to fight?"
"As much as I know." Amara answers, "Maybe recruit Ben and Rey to help. I still don't know where to have this at."
Ahsoka kept her smile.
"Maybe go to Coruscant and speak to the Chancellor about the old Jedi Temple." Amara says.
Ahsoka frowns a little, "Amara."
"I am aware of the history of the building, Ahsoka, but I feel despite the bad that has happened in that building, it remains the temple." Amara says.
Ahsoka shrugs, "Maybe."
"I want these future students to learn the ways of the Force in the teachings of Uncle Luke, my mom, Master Yoda, my grandfather." Amara says.
Ahsoka kept her eyes on Amara at that moment.
"I was taught through Anakin," Amara says, "Although a lot of it early was guessing. So I guess I'm going to ask Rey and Ben, maybe beg to have someone who were actually trained by a living breathing Jedi."
"I- I could always come and help. That is if the Chancellor allows the use of the old temple." Ahsoka says.
Amara looked stunned.
"Really?" She asks.
Ahsoka nods, "I'd like Anakin's legacy not to just be about his darkness but rather the goodness he carried in him."
Amara nods.
"I understand." Amara tells her.
Ahsoka gives her a small grin, "I wish you luck in your quest, young one." Ahsoka then placed a comlink in Amara's hand, "When you get things all figured out, just contact me and I'll be there."
Amara smiles, "Thank you, Ahsoka."
"You're welcome, Amara." Ahsoka says, "May the Force be with you,"
Amara nods, "May the Force be with you as well."
{A NEW ORDER}
this is something you want to do?" Ben asks.
Amara and Ben sat alone in the Falcon. The two were in the cockpit, each sitting in a pilot's chair. Amara sat in co-pilot whereas Ben was in the pilot seat.
Amara looks at him.
His features were calm and collective. He was trying to not walk on egg shells around Amara, but he also didn't want to push her into a corner.
"Yes. I'm positive." Amara says, "The Jedi Order doesn't have to be what it used to be. It- It can be better."
Ben looks forward.
Ben stares out the large window in front of them. He watches some people past the old ship. He leans back in his seat, a little comfortable, but also unsure how to continue.
"I am going to be going to Coruscant. I am going to be speaking with the Chancellor about this." Amara says.
Ben smirks a little.
That's his sister. When she has something in her head, nothing is going to stop her from seeing it through.
"And what did General Dameron have to say about this?" Ben asks looking at her.
Amara had a small grin, "He is being supportive."
Ben nods.
"I guess- I guess since I'm not doing anything reckless, he doesn't feel the need to worry." Amara says.
Ben glanced at her.
"You feeling okay?" Ben asks.
Amara locked eyes with Ben.
He was giving her a protective brother look. A look Amara was quite familiar with. She remembered seeing him give her that look plenty of times growing up.
Amara broke eye contact first.
"I uh- I feel different. I don't know exactly what it is that I'm feeling," Amara says, "Maybe it's guilt. For Freya. For all of this. I don't know."
"Mari," Ben says, "It's not your fault."
Amara gives her brother a sad smile, "Maybe. Maybe not." She glanced back at him, "Either way, I feel like bringing back the Jedi Order could be a good thing."
Ben doesn't say anything.
"It can honor Freya. It can honor mom and Uncle Luke." Amara says and looks directly into her brother's eyes, "It can honor all those who died during the purge."
Ben frowns.
Amara looks forward out the window.
"What do you want for the Jedi Order?" Ben asks, "Rule? Command?"
Amara glanced at her brother.
She shakes her head, "No. The galaxy needed the Jedi once upon a time and then they betrayed the very people who sought out to protect them. I- I don't think the Jedi are needed for the galaxy, but rather they are needed to help guide those who are like us." Amara says, "They need teachers, instructors, lessons, training."
Ben nods.
"So that's why I want to go to Courscant. I want to speak to the Chancellor about using the old Jedi Temple." Amara says.
"Mari," Ben says.
Amara kept her gaze at her brother, "I'm aware of the painful memories that hold the halls of the Jedi Temple. I've read my history, brother." She tells him, "But I feel like it's the perfect spot to rebuild the order, and not in the imagine of the old."
Ben has a small smile on his face.
"You're really serious about this." He says.
Amara grins, "Of course I am." She says.
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