𝙄 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙡𝙠𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙛𝙞𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙠𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙡𝙞𝙥𝙨

- 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗺𝗼𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 (𝗳𝗲𝗮𝘁. 𝗪𝗶𝗻𝗼𝗻𝗮 𝗢𝗮𝗸)

Today as been fucking painful...but that's okay. I know that I have to go through the storm to get my very own version of the rainbow. Bee. Who now has a name...an actual name. I mean it's not Stella - the name I was calling her before Bee back in Italy - but it's pretty close. Isabelle is pretty and...dainty. Just how I image her to be.

"Sorry about my parents." Dan whispers as he lays on the hospital bed next to me. It took at least two hours of convincing him that no nurse has any need to walk in or out for the night. I'm off of the IV drip until tomorrow...I'm really dreading that. It hurt like a bitch - just like karma! Maybe this was karma for not calling Ali back about Georgie. My twin is probably cremated by now and...I'm in hospital because I'm pregnant with his niece that he didn't even know about.

Maybe I should call up Ali? It's better if I just give him the news before one day he gets bored and decides to google me. He should know about his niece too...maybe it will make me feel better? Every time I think about his texts...I remember how he might have my brothers suicide note.

I know that I should read it...I'm just not in a good state of mind at the moment. Anyway, I don't need no negativity. It's not like I can get worried about him if I read it - he's gone.

"Don't be sorry. I love your mom...and your dad is awesome when he finds something that we have in common." We ended up talking about this weird psychological movie. I can definitely see where Dan get's his passion and good film taste...they're so alike. It's really nice. I wonder whether Bee is going to have good movie taste? Maybe one day she can have many conversations with her grandad about films? That would be ridiculously sweet.

"I think my mum loves you more than me and Fran..." I can't help but burst out laughing. That's honestly the cutest thing ever, Isla is such a sweet and caring woman. Ever since I had a one-to-one with her we've been close. I told her about my mother and she revealed she had cancer...but thankfully there's no evidence. She's took me in as a daughter.

I didn't tell Dan...nor will I ever since my chance is gone. But me and Isla...we never stopped talking - even when me and Dan broke up.My daughter deserves a family as close as Dan's. Me and Bee are honoured to even be a part of the Smith family and that is the truth.

I stop laughing as Dan rests his head against mine. We just embrace the silence - and each other - for a couple of minutes. We have this love...it's so strong that we don't even need to talk to understand each other. This year has been crazy but I would be lying if I say that I don't love the craziness...because I love it so much...

I then hold the side of Dan's cheek. Unlike earlier last month it's more fuller...healthier. Not to mention he is growing his yearly beard stubble again - sexy fucker.

"Are you okay with calling her Isabelle...because it doesn't have to be permanent." I shake my head in protest. Instead of looking in his dreamy blue eyes I shake my head and close my eyes enjoying the peace. Plus I think Bee is finally sleeping...she's so still. This evening she almost gave me a stomachache with her movement - it was a blessing of course.

"Maisie. I need to know if you're only saying yes because you want to impress my parents." So there might be some truth in what Dan is saying. Of course I want them to feel included in my daughters life...and naming her is a huge thing. "I love the name Isabelle. It's an excuse to call her Bee for the rest of her life." I wasn't too keen on Isabelle at first...but now I realise that I can call her Bee without needing to give a reason why Bee is her nickname. It's a win-win especially since it's a pretty name.

"What about...Isabelle Stella Campbell Smith, huh?" I open my eyes at her name.

"Fuck yeah..." I whisper trying not to cry in actual happiness. I know that the 'Campbell' is tradition and I was expecting it. "Yeah?" Dan repeats as I nod my head falling into his soft pink lips...

"It's perfect." I whisper pulling back with my eyes closed.