After Ali went zooming on ahead, me and Lana had to drive Maisie home. It was awkward for my behalf because...I felt like I don't fit in with the pair of them. Of course I do. I share the same pain as Maisie but - they're both mothers and I guess I never really bonded with Bee.

After we dropped her home with Ali we both then went home and straight to bed. Both of us are exhausted. We went from doing nothing - to saving somebodies life within an hour or two. And now Lana is laying besides me, we say nothing. She hasn't spoken a word since she said goodbye to Maisie. I guess I could be a dickhead and ruin this silence, or I could put my arm around her.

"Why didn't you tell me..." Lana literally fucking shrugs. "I was sixteen and was in a relationship with a older guy who...treated me like shit. I was only a couple of weeks...probably not even that. Sick thing is people who have abortions end up pregnant longer than I was." Just the thought of someone acting violent towards Lana makes my skin crawl.

"I've been in a relationship...where she wasn't afraid to get physical." I admit. "I established that..." her voice wearily trails off as I look at her in confusion. Sometimes it feels like Lana knows me better than I know myself. "Only because when we was play fighting and you kept flinching. I mean I was going going to flick you on your nose." I'm a fuck up. "Who would flick someone on the nose?" I laugh in curiosity as Lana goes to do it again - I still flinch. "Me." She smiles. I slightly shake my head, "what would I do without you?" I whisper brushing her cheek with the back of my fingers.

She has the softest skin ever.

"It wasn't...as bad as what you went though. You lost a baby and you was only a kid...that's fucked up. Honestly." I whisper. "It why I don't talk about it. I was sixteen. This happened years ago, you know? The fucker got what he deserved. Apparently he got arrested as soon as he came out of jail - he beat up a prostitute or something?" Fucking hell.

"And don't compare our toxic relationships. Trust me. Each to their own is bad." I nod my head while Lana yawns slightly.

"I think Maisie likes you." It's been a weird night. I might as well just say what looked and seemed true...even if it was painfully awkward. "Maisie fucking hates me." Lana almost laughs. "I'm sure she doesn't fucking hate you." I'm only saying this because I want to cheer Lana up too. This has been a heavy night for both women. I need to motivate her.

Is it stupid to think that I don't want her falling asleep sad or anything.

"I took you away from her. Trust me she hates me. Tonight she felt sympathy towards me. We nearly share the same experience. I told her what I wish someone told me. That's all." I don't get how Lana can be so calm. I mean even now I feel like complete and utter shit but I'm only hiding it because I want Lana to be happy.

"Thank you again, babe." I whisper before Lana gives me a kiss. Is a nice slow one, slow and passionate - just like before. But this time the kiss doesn't lead anywhere. Instead Lana leans on top of me and closes her eyes while I wrap the covers around us. "Love you" I whisper, sounding like a needy teenager. "Love you" Lana softly whispers back while I try to hold in my smile.

She truly is one of a kind.