King Robert,

I write to you now with a solemn invitation to Winterfell. It is to be my late sister, Lyanna's burial. I understand if you are busy with affairs of the realm but I truly wish for you to be here. I invite you to say your farewells and to make peace. I look forward to seeing you soon, my friend.

Ned Stark Warden of the North

°•°•°•°•°•°

Livia sat at the windowsill with a view of the ocean, finally at King's Landing.

Robert would be addressing the concerns of the people at the throne room by now but she couldn't find the strength to join him. Not with the message they received the day before.

Livia had been with her ladies and Cersei the day before. The sun was just about to set as the rays touched the water but all of them were still conversing.

It seems the news of her pregnancy had spread throughout the whole realm like wildfire. 

When they had returned to King's Landing, everyone had been congratulating them. Even the common people knew. Maybe the people of the Stormlands were the gossipers of the realm.

"My queen, do you think it will be a boy or a girl?" One of her ladies asked.

"I do not know, I only pray to the gods that he or she will inherit Robert's eyes. Blue like that of a storm." Livia answered, smiling.

Her ladies giggled amongst themselves while Cersei only shook her head. Despite their disagreements before, Livia knew that her sister was happy for her.

"I'm sure the king would want a son." Cersei arrogantly announced and Livia had a slight vision of hitting her sister over the head with a vase.

Livia gritted her teeth in what she hoped was still a smile. "Actually, Robert does not care if the child were to be a boy or a girl. Any child of ours would make the both of us very happy."

All of her ladies awed at her words, and Thisel piped up. "Have you and the king thought of names yet, my queen?"

"Isn't it too soon, Thisel? I haven't even started showing yet." Livia teased, making them all laugh before continuing. "But I plan on surprising him by naming the child after his lady mother."

All of her ladies swept her into an embrace, dabbing at their eyes and making Livia smile at the gesture. 

Before any of them could say anything, the doors to the chambers opened.

They all turned to see Robert, pale and silent, his eyes solely on Livia.

"All of you may go. Have the servants deliver supper here in an hour." Livia commanded, standing from her seat and feeling the tension emanating from Robert.

Something was wrong. Terribly wrong.

All of her ladies and Cersei bowed before leaving the room. It was only the two of them then.

Livia walked towards him, concern in her eyes.

Cradling his cheek in her hand, she broke the silence. "What's wrong, Robert?"

He raised his hand, pressing her hand to his lips and planting a kiss into her palm. "I-Nothing, everything is alright."

She frowned, locking her arms around his neck. "Are we still keeping secrets between us?"

"No, of course not." He answered, before pressing one of his palms on her belly. "Now, how is our little prince or princess?"

"Are we going to be avoiding questions now?" Livia replied, her voice sweet but firm. "Tell me, darling."

Robert sighed before pulling her into an embrace. It was silent for so long that she thought he would not speak at all but he did. "A raven came from Winterfell."

"From Ned? What did he say?" She asked, giddy to hear from the man she considered a friend.

"He invites me to Winterfell," He started, taking in a deep breath before continuing. "to pay my respects to Lyanna Stark's grave."

"What?" She pulled away, suddenly feeling lost.

The woman he started a war for, the woman who had first captured his heart. Despite being long gone from this life, she had returned to haunt their lives.

Never had she felt such anger towards Lyanna Stark before that very moment. She will not allow her to do this, to take from her the man she loves.

Seven hells, she loves him. So completely, so utterly in love with him. It was only in that moment that she realized it but the love had been there for quite some time. 

Perhaps she has loved him from the moment they went hunting. Or perhaps the night of their wedding. But it did not matter for he still loved Lyanna.

"I will n-" Robert began.

"I can go with you. It has been a long time since I've seen Ned. Perhaps we could..." Livia interrupted before trailing off. "Unless, of course, you do not wish for me to come?"

"No, it is not that at all, I promise. You are with child, my Liv. I do not wish to tire you." He said, comforting her. "Besides, I do not even want to go."

She gazed at him and saw conflict. He wanted to go but at the same time, he did not want to upset her.

Livia was restless that night, tossing and turning, unable to sleep. 

Giving up, she lit a candle by her bedside and the room was brightened with an eerie yellow glow. Turning to Robert, she saw him sleeping his mouth muttering incoherent words.

Even if his nightmares had lessened, she knew they still bothered him. Not every night but on the rarest of occasions, he still did. 

How could she allow him to suffer like this? To let him sleep through all of the nightmares?

He had helped her heal, assured her that none of the sins of her past were her fault.

How could she say she loved him if she could not help him do the same?

Pressing a soft kiss to his raven curls, she watched him ease into a dreamless sleep, knowing what she must do.

Sighing, Livia stood from her seat, pressing both palms to her eyes. 

All her life, she had been waiting for her purpose in the world. All her life, she had been waiting for the person she would love with all her heart.

Now that she had found him, she would have to let him go.

"My queen?" A voice hesitantly spoke up. "The king is looking for you."

Breathing shakily, Livia lifted her head to see Lord Arryn. It was as if the gods were trying to convince her to go through with it.

It would be too easy to ask Robert not to leave, to stay with her forever. But if she did, she would be forsaking him into a life full of nightmares. She may give him a small respite but he would live with his sins.

She should let Robert go. It was the hardest thing she would have to do. 

"My queen?" Lord Arryn repeated, now worried. 

Livia stood up, composing herself. "Lord Arryn, could you see to preparations for the king's trip to Winterfell?"

"Winterfell? The king hasn't mentioned anything." 

"Yes, but he is to leave. Tomorrow, if possible. A small retinue is fine and you shall be going with him."

Lord Arryn was conflicted but she knew that he would have to agree with her wishes. "Yes, my queen. I presume you won't be coming along?"

"Yes, Robert has said that I will not be travelling what with the baby." Livia answered. "Thank you, Lord Arryn."

With a bow, Lord Arryn left, leaving her with her thoughts.

She had always been selfless all her life. She had always put her family first, her friends first but for once, she wished she could be selfish.

But she couldn't. Not when she loved him more than she had ever loved anyone.

°•°•°•°•°•°

"Why are you doing this?"

Robert asked, looking on in shock as he saw horses, wagons, knights, even Jon. All of them prepared to leave for Winterfell. 

He had not even noticed until Livia led him outside and faced him with the news.

"I did not wish to." Livia answered curtly.

Robert looked at her, seeing her face blank but he knew better. She knew that there was more hiding beneath the surface. "I told you I did not want to go and you are with child, we are not going."

"I am not. But you are going." She said, voice finally cracking with emotion. "Do you think I want to do this?"

"Liv, I can't leave you. Not now, not like this." He pressed, trying to make her see. 

She shook her head. "You must. Robert, you've helped me so much, with my nightmares, with everything. You gave me a reason to live and I-I have to do this. For you."

"Why? Tell me why, Liv." He asked. Clearly she did not want him to leave.

Livia looked at him then and he knew what she was going to say, just from the emerald eyes, glistening with tears. "Be-because I love you and I couldn't bear to be selfish with you. I love you and I have to let you go."

Robert pulled her into his arms tightly and tried to say the words. "I-I..."

She pulled away, pressing a finger to his lips, stopping him. "Shh, don't say anything you do not mean. I love you because you helped me heal a part of me I always thought would be broken. I told you, not so you could tell me the same but because I want you to know that when you return, I will be here."

His heart started beating so furiously. How could he have been so lucky as to have this woman as his wife? He wanted nothing more than to say the words but he could only show that he cared. Perhaps one day, he could say the words.

Livia Baratheon. His queen, his wife, the mother of his child. The woman who loved him so much that she was willing to let him go for him to finally say goodbye to the person who haunted him, even without a promise that he will return.

But he will. He will come back to her. Always.

Robert bent down, pressing his lips to her gently, sweetly. Showing the words he could not say, telling her thank you, telling her that he cared for her greatly. He savored the taste of honey and tea on her lips, knowing that she was the greatest thing in his life.

"You are my life, my Liv. Without you, my life would be a worthless mess. I may leave now but I promise I will return. I will return for you, for our child. For us. I promise I will always come back to you." Robert said, wiping a stray tear that fell from her eyes.

Livia lifted one of his hands, kissing it and pressing it to her flat stomach. From his mind's eye he could almost see the future. He would return to King's Landing, having made his peace and he would see her. Her belly would have started to show and he would see the smile glowing on her face, the love in her eyes.

That was when he would know. That was when he would know that he was home.

But for now, he had to go. He had to leave, even if he would be breaking both their hearts.

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