You get a text from your nephew, who is 8 years old and in third grade at his elementary school.

"We're having 'Career Day' next week at school, and we are supposed to ask our family and friends if anyone would like to come in and talk about their jobs in front of my class," he writes. "Will you come and talk about yours?"

"I'm so sorry," you text back. "I'm too busy next week."

"OK," he replies. "Can you ask your boyfriend if HE will come and talk about HIS job?"

-Of course, he's thrilled to talk to the third graders!

-He's such a good guy, the kids love him immediately

-He explains all about becoming a professional Hunter and all the cool things he had to do to get his license (he leaves out the bit about Hisoka knocking him out)

-He finishes up his presentation with a (very) modified game of Rock, Paper, Scissors and all the kids fight to get a chance to play

-Killua tells the class that he too is a Hunter

-He says he's also a pro gamer and once spent a long time in a really difficult virtual reality game that was nearly impossible to win

-"Minecraft?" says one of the little kids

-"Grand Theft Auto 5?" says another kid

-"Jayden!" reprimands the teacher. "Behave."

-Killua groans

-He finishes by showing the kids how he can conduct electricity through his fingers

-We already know that Kurapika's presentation is going to be totally organized, educational, factual, and that he's practiced it in front of the mirror a couple times to make sure it's perfect

-He talks about cybersecurity

-The kids are bored

-Leorio is organized about his Career Day presentation too, but it's easy because he's a doctor and there's lots of things to talk about

-The kids are interested and have lots of questions

-One kid raises his hand. "Have you ever seen anyone die?"

-Leorio considers this for a minute. "Well, yes."

-The kid waves his hand again. "Is it true that when you die all your poop runs out of you?"

-Leorio opens his mouth to answer, but the teacher screams, "JAYDEN!"

-It's not a good idea to have Hisoka around children

-You don't even bring up Career Day to him

-You are hesitant to let Illumi do this, but for some reason he is excited about it

-"Tone it down," you warn him

-He comes into the class and says, "Hi! I'm Mr. Zoldyck!"

-"You said 'dick," snickers one kid.

-"That will do, Jayden," says the teacher. "How about we call him Mr. Z?"

-"What do you do for your job, Mr. Z?" the class all says in unison, obediently

-"I'm an assassin," says Illumi

-"YOU SAID 'ASS,'" hoots the same kid

-"Jayden, you're going to the principal right now," orders the teacher.

-"What's an as-as-as....whatever it is?" says another kid.

-Illumi thinks over the best way to explain this and says, "Well here, let me just show you." He whips out a pin and fires it at the teacher's head

-"Don't worry, it's just temporary," he tells the kids, who are staring stunned at their teacher collapsed on the floor.

-Half the kids start crying, but the other half give each other high fives and say "No homework tonight! Mr. Z rules!"

-"You want me to go talk to a bunch of third graders about my job?" Chrollo says. "Somehow I don't think I'm the exact right person for this"

-"I agree," you say, "But my nephew is in kind of a bind, he can't find anyone else. Just go and make something up"

-Chrollo puts on a regular outfit and takes off his earrings and all that so he looks like a normal person

-"I'm a...uh...I'm an event planner!" he tells the class brightly

-"I go to all these really cool things like auctions and places where expensive stuff is being sold, and I make sure everything goes smoothly and everyone has a great time!"

-Feitan just looks at you in disbelief

-"Come on, please?" you say. "Hey, tell them you're a lawyer. I mean, you do put bad guys 'on the stand' and 'cross examine' them."

-Feitan sighs and agrees to do it

-As he's talking to the class, one kid puts up his hand and says, "My dad is a lawyer. Where did you get your law degree?"

-Feitan goes blank. "Um. The University of (says something in his language that nobody understands)"

-"Is that, like, in America?" asks the kid rudely

-"Be polite to Mr. Portor, please," the teacher says

-Shalnark scratches his head. "I am not really sure how to tell a bunch of little kids that I am a gang member and I go around wasting people"

-"Can I, like, volunteer for art project day instead?" he pleads. "Or the bake sale?"