— t w e n t y - s e v e n —

what had to be the millionth time, and then proceeded to say, "fuck, fuck, fuck — "

"Reed," Oliver said, "it's fine, just calm — "

"Don't tell me to calm down!" Reed spun on him, running panicked hands through his hair. It had started to drizzle but neither of them were ready to face the possible shitshow that might be waiting for them inside. "This is bad, this is really fucking bad, fuck, fuck — "

Oliver stepped in front of him and caught Reed's face in his hands in an attempt to cut off his frenzied pacing. To his relief, Reed didn't jerk away or snap at him to get off him, but he didn't look as if he was about to calm down anytime soon. He had started trembling again and looked as if he was struggling to keep his breathing even. Oliver could only imagine he was still feeling that restless anxiety from the weed and Brooks walking in on them only exacerbated that. Oliver needed to curb the spiralling before it escalated to an unmanageable level. He didn't think think Reed could handle another panic attack in the space of an hour.

"Breathe," Oliver commanded, looking him straight in the eye. He pressed a finger to Reed's mouth when he tried to say something. "No, it's my turn to be the bossy one. First of all, just breathe." He waited until Reed took a deep breath, and then another, before continuing. "It's going to be fine, okay? Brooks is the last person who would ever run around telling everyone what he saw. You should know, he understands better than anyone what it's like to hide something like this. It's not like it's going to be a surprise to him that you like kissing boys."

Reed glared at him half-heartedly. "I was drunk when I kissed him."

"And you were drunk the first time we kissed," Oliver reminded him. "That didn't mean you didn't like it."

"Speak for yourself. And I wasn't," Reed said, with another deep breath. The conversation seemed to be helping to distract him and Oliver was relieved that some of the tension had left his shoulders. "Drunk the first time we kissed, I mean. The roof." He raised his eyebrow in silent question. "Unless you've forgotten."

Oliver smiled. "No. I could never forget about that."

"Because it was such a traumatic event that totally ruined our friendship?"

"Well, sure," Oliver said, "but I was thinking more along the lines of it was my first kiss and I really liked it."

Reed's lips quirked up in an almost smile. He traced a finger along Oliver's knuckles and up the sensitive skin of his wrist, sending shivers down his spine. The rain had darkened Reed's hair to gold and plastered it to his temples, streaming rivulets down his face, his lips pink and parted. It would be a bad idea to kiss him again, when Adam could come down at any point wondering where they were, or Brooks could reappear (which seems highly unlikely with the way he fled the scene earlier), or even bad luck bringing Adam's parents home early for whatever reason. Reed seemed to have similar thoughts and leant back with obvious reluctance.

"What are we going to do about Brooks?"

"Why does it sound like you're planning to have him assassinated?" Oliver asked, amused.

"Well..."

"I'm going to step in before you start searching for hitmen. We'll talk to him, ask him not to say anything. Tomorrow," he said, catching Reed's wrist when he turned towards the house. "You're not doing anything tonight other than drinking some water and sleeping this high off. How do you feel now?"

"Okay. Better," he allowed, at Oliver's expectant look. "Still a bit...on edge. Like something bad might happen, as stupid as that sounds. Everything was fine, it was fun, and then something just felt off, and..." He trailed off with a grimace. Oliver slipped his hand into Reed's and gave a tight squeeze. "Anyway. Never doing that again."

"Definitely a good idea."

Reed tipped his head back against the wall, gazing up at the dark sky sprinkled with silvery stars. A comfortable silence settled over them. Oliver knew they needed to head inside, that Adam was waiting for them and the rain wasn't easing up. Instead, Oliver studied Reed, at the rain dripping off his lashes and the familiar slope of his nose, his hair bleached to bone white beneath the moonlight. They were features he had spent hours memorising and would never tire of looking at. Oliver wanted to talk about where this was going, whether Reed ever saw a future between them beyond sneaking around behind everyone's back kiss in private. He wanted to know if Reed saw this as anything more than casual experimentation, feeling out for his sexuality the way Oliver had done with Finley.

But when Reed tilted his head in silent question in response to Oliver's gaze and asked, "What are you thinking?" Oliver couldn't bring himself to voice any of his thoughts out loud. Because he wasn't like Finley in this situation. He cared about Reed, way more than he had ever anticipated, and he wasn't ready to have it all thrown back in his face if it was one-sided after all.

"Nothing," Oliver said, a safe lie. Reed didn't look convinced so Oliver changed the subject to the first thing he could think of before he pressed the point. "Do you have any idea what your sexuality could be?"

Reed blinked in surprise. That was clearly the last thing he had been expecting and to be honest, Oliver wasn't so sure that he had been expecting it either. He was still high enough that his mouth wasn't running on entirely the same wavelength as his brain and was acting of its own accord.

"Not really," Reed said slowly. "I've thought about it, but...I don't know. I guess I'm not straight."

Oliver smiled. "That's always a promising start. Am I safe to assume you're attracted to guys?"

"Sure," Reed said, with a roll of his eyes, "I guess you could say that."

"Really? You don't sound very sure."

Reed yanked him forward hard enough that Oliver's breath caught in his throat and kissed him fiercely enough that stars sparked behind his eyelids. Reed kissed him long and hard, biting down lightly on Oliver's lip, before murmuring against his lips, "That convincing enough for you?"

"Mhm." Oliver was struggling to recall his own name after that, forget the conversation they were having. "You know, I think I might need more convincing."

Oliver leant forward to recapture his mouth and Reed granted him a tantalising few seconds of kissing before resting a hand against Oliver's chest, giving him a light push back. "I don't think so," he said, the breathless tremor to his words giving him away. It looked as if it was taking every bit of his willpower not to pull Oliver into another heart-stopping kiss and the sight of his heavy-lidded gaze was enough to leave Oliver tingling all over. "One Montgomery walking in on us is more than enough for my paranoia. Let's cap it there."

Oliver groaned, but reluctantly moved to put space between them. "You sure know how to play hard to get, Sterling. Fine," he said, trying to recollect his thoughts through the haze of weed and desire that had settled over his brain. It took a minute to even remember what they had been talking about. "Your sexuality. Fine. You like guys. How handy for me that you can finally admit that."

"You know, you're part of the reason why it took me so long to admit it."

Oliver stared at him. "What?"

"You asked me once, back in that bar in London, what it was that scared me so much. Liking boys or liking you," Reed said, and Oliver just shook his head with a blank look. Of all the things he was remembering of that drunken night, it wasn't the angry words they had exchanged after the kiss. All his memories of that night were reserved for the kiss itself and how good it had felt. "Well, I thought about it a lot. Liking you meant liking boys, and liking you...that was risky. Stupid. A stupid risk where I might lose my best friend again if things went wrong again. I didn't want to like you. It would have been so much easier."

"Okay," Oliver said slowly, trying to make sense of an explanation that made little sense as it was to him. "You didn't want to like me, in case it ruined our friendship, so you told yourself you didn't like boys so you couldn't like me?" Oliver frowned, unsure what he had just said. It made even less than what Reed was saying. He couldn't tell whether his mouth was running away without him again or this conversation was just getting too convoluted. "Wait, no – "

Reed shook his head in frustration. "Doesn't matter. I don't even know what I'm trying to say. I'm probably bisexual," he said, although he still sounded a little unsure. "I like guys. I like girls. Makes sense."

"Sure. You don't need to put a label on it, though," Oliver said. "As long as you're comfortable with whatever you decide, it doesn't matter."

Reed frowned. "No. Uncertainty is...I don't like it."

"Okay," Oliver said, unable to stop himself chuckling a little. With his faultlessly tidy nature and desire for control, of course Reed wouldn't like uncertainty. "Label away, then."

The two of them spent far too long outside. By the time they came back inside, sliding the glass doors as quietly as possible behind them and creeping back up the stairs to the attic, they were shivering. There was no need to be so quiet. Even if anyone had been home other than Brooks and Adam, the house was large enough that their footsteps never would have carried to disturb anyone. It soon became apparent why Adam had never come down to check on them despite the fact they must have been gone for at least an hour. He was sprawled out across one of the sofas in the attic and fast asleep, the Netflix credits rolling across the TV for the film none of them had watched.

"Should we wake him up?" Oliver asked.

"Nah. "Reed grabbed the remote and switched the TV off. He seemed a lot more relaxed now and Oliver was pretty much sober at this point. "He looks comfortable there. It means we can just take his bed. No," he said firmly, at whatever he saw on Oliver's face when he opened his mouth. "Don't even think about it. You're taking one side and I'm taking the other. We are not fooling around in his bed before we've even told him about us."

"Does that mean we can fool around in it after we've told him?" Oliver asked with a smirk. "Because that feels like a bit of a slap in the face."

"If you don't shut up, I don't plan on ever touching you ever again."

"That is such a lie," Oliver said. "You could at least try something a little more convincing." Reed chucked one of the sofa cushions at his head but Oliver ducked out of the way in time and caught him before he could walk out of the room, silencing his protests with kisses.

They had little choice but to change out of their damp clothes and rifled through Adam's drawers for spare pyjamas in the hopes he wouldn't mind either of them borrowing his clothes. Oliver seriously doubted it — he owned so many, it was questionable whether he would even notice anything was missing. For all his teasing, there was very little touching that night. The weed had worn off but it left Oliver feeling so drowsy he could barely keep his eyes open as they crawled into Adam's bed. He was already drifting off when Reed shifted closer to him, snuggling up against his side.

"Thought you assigned us our own sides?" Oliver said sleepily.

"Changed my mind," Reed murmured into his shoulder. There was a note of vulnerability to his voice, as if it was easier to let some of his guards drop when they were alone in the dark. "I got lonely over there."

Oliver smiled against his hair. "Good thing I was here, then."

He was half-asleep minutes later when Reed said, "Oliver?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you awake?"

"Barely."

He was quiet so long that Oliver almost fell asleep again when he said softly, "Thank you. For helping me tonight. That would would have been so much worse without you there."

"Of course," Oliver said, just as softly, wrapping an arm around Reed to draw him closer. He smelt like rain and night, warm in the circle of his arms. "You're my..." He faltered, not sure where the brief moment of uncertainty came from. He decided to blame the weed. "You're my best friend, Reed. I'll always be here for you. I hope you know that."

Oliver was drifting off into a dreamless when he thought he heard Reed whisper, "I know."

He woke to wintry sunlight spilling through the curtains and Reed poking him insistently in the shoulder. He was sat up, blonde hair a rumpled mess around his head and yawning even as he moved from poking Oliver in the forehead to the cheek.

"Good morning to you, too," Oliver said sleepily, batting Reed's hand away with a yawn of his own. With a smirk, and clearly just to be difficult, he resorted to poking Oliver's chest. "As much as I love waking up next to you, this isn't my preferred form of being woken up. Bet you can't guess what it is."

That got Reed's attention. His poking paused, eyebrows raised with blatant curiosity. "Yeah?"

"Let me give you a demonstration," Oliver said, tugging him down for a kiss. He was still half-asleep but the warm press of Reed's mouth against his own and the roaming of his hand down Oliver's chest was enough to rouse him to consciousness. He drew back enough to grin up at Reed. "Better, right? So much for not fooling around in Adam's bed."

"That wasn't fooling around. It was a much needed demonstration. And I wasn't waking you up just to kiss you," Reed said, with a sternness that was diminished by the hand he was running through Oliver's hair, twisting the thick strands between his fingers. He nodded to the en-suite door. "Adam just got in the shower. That was fun, by the way, barely waking up in time to move to the other end of the bed before he saw us."

"He'll have to find out about us eventually."

Reed stared at him like he'd lost his mind. "Not like that. He definitely wouldn't take the news about us well in that situation. Anyway, the point is, we should go deal with Brooks while Adam is in the shower."

Oliver rolled his eyes. "Deal with?"

"I said what I said."

"And I told you to stop acting like you're part of the Russian mafia. Maybe I should talk to Brooks alone," Oliver said. "I'm not sure your antagonism is going to help anything."

"And I don't trust your calm level-headedness to deal with this appropriately," Reed retorted. "You won't make it clear enough to him that he can't go blabbing about what he saw to everyone. Fine, maybe I can admit that I may not be as straight as I liked to think I was — "

"You don't say," Oliver said, with a snort.

Here Reed shot him an irritated look and continued pointedly, " — But that doesn't mean I'm ready for all of Lexus to know about it, or Woodway, or wherever it might spread. Not unless it's on my terms."

"Which is totally fair enough," Oliver said, to make it clear he would never want anyone to be outed before they where ready. "That doesn't mean you need to bully and threaten silence out of Brooks, which I know is the approach you're about to take. I still don't really understand why you hate him so much, you know. You said he reminded you of me, back when you hated me for leaving for London." Oliver trailed fingers up Reed's arm, light enough that they left goosebumps in their wake. "I'm going to go out on the limb and say you don't hate me anymore."

"Bold of you to assume," Reed muttered, even as he shivered at Oliver's fingers finding the nape of his neck, teasing the soft hair there. "I hate you a lot of the time, especially when you bring up stupid topics like this one."

"This isn't stupid. I'm just curious about why you're still giving Brooks such a hard time."

Reed glared at him. "Anyone ever told you you're way too curious for your own good?"

"Mhm, I believe it was you." Oliver returned his glare with an amused smile. Whether it was long-term exposure to Reed's abrasive personality or he had just learn it was mostly show, he found how easy it was to rile Reed up more endearing than offensive. He was like an angry kitten, especially with his fluffy bedhead and icy blue eyes. "Something about curiosity killing the cat, wasn't it? Although I did hear somewhere that satisfaction brought it back."

Reed gave him light shove to the shoulder but the corners of his lips were twitching in a suppressed smile. The only thing more satisfying than riling him up was knowing he'd amused him when he was trying to stay irritated. Reed gazed down at him and Oliver knew he was considering his words, debating whether they were worth an answer. "I don't know," he said finally, still running absent fingers through Oliver's hair. "Maybe I just want someone to be angry at. It's easier, or at least less exhausting, than being angry at myself. After I...I kissed him, that stupid drunk mistake that forced me to question things before I wanted to, it was like he had this secret over me. That he didn't tell everyone only made it worse, like he was waiting to blackmail me with it."

"Brooks, blackmail you?" Oliver said in disbelief. "I think he's the last person who'd ever be capable of that."

"I never said it was rational, okay?" Reed slid his hands free from his hair and scowled down at them, refusing to meet Oliver's gaze. "And now, he has two secrets. Me and him. You and him. I don't like it." His scowl deepened. "I don't like him."

"You don't like the power you feel he has over you," Oliver corrected, with a gentle squeeze of Reed's hand. "But maybe you should take the fact he's kept quiet about your secrets for so long as a sign he's respecting your privacy rather than waiting for the right moment to blackmail you. It would be a far more logical conclusion to make."

Reed turned his scowl on Oliver. "Why do you have to make so much sense?"

"What can I say? I can't help always being right."

"It's annoying."

"You better get used to it." Oliver sat up, pressing a quick kiss to Reed's lips. "Trust me. Give Brooks the benefit of the doubt."