"Alice we are out of beer."

More importantly we were out of food but you know, it was good that Ryan had his priorities in order....

"I can go get some more."

I put down my dish cloth that I was currently using to wipe down the kitchen surfaces, ready to go out, when Ryan interrupted me.

"No, I can't have you running off again. I'll go. I'm locking you inside so don't even try and leave."

I nodded my head and went back to doing my tedious chores. Ryan wanted everything to be spotless. It had been just over a week since Antonio had left me here and I was starting to lose my patience. I needed him and I needed him now. My days were spent following him around the house and picking up the trail of mess that he left behind him wherever he went. The nights were the worst.

"Where's your card?"

I turned my head up towards Ryan and quirked a brow, confused about his question.

"Well how do you think I'm going to pay for everything?"

Oh....now it made sense.

I walked over to my bedroom and rummaged through my draws for my card. I had been given it back a few weeks ago by Antonio and had taken it with me on this trip.

I quickly hurried back to Ryan once I'd found it and gave him it's pin number as well. Sure, it was all my hard earned money but it wasn't as if Ryan cared about that. I knew that if I voiced my opinions all I'd get in return would be a slap to the face and lecture about how 'what's mine is his and what's his is mine'. None of which I needed nor wanted.

Without another word the door slammed shut and I was left alone, just how I wanted to be.

My time with Ryan had been horrific but I suppose that was nothing but what was to be expected. So far I had gathered more bruises and injuries than I could count on one hand. I had a large bruise on my forehead from the pan incident and another gash from when Ryan decided to hit me on the head with an already broken beer bottle. That was a favorite move of his and despite everything he had managed to find a method that meant it'd hurt me but never leave too much damage. For a drunk, he was smart. My stomach looked as though it had been painted like a canvas from the amount of bruises that now covered it, as with my arms and legs. My little finger on my left hand was now tapped to the finger next to it because it had been broken when Ryan snapped it back. I was also pretty certain that I'd at least sprained my ankle but couldn't be too sure. Never the less, it was now very painful to walk around, especially with all the cleaning I was doing, but I had no choice but to carry on. Then of course I had a black eye and busted lip from when I'd received several bashes to the face. Although I probably needed professional help, I couldn't go to the hospital. Ryan wouldn't allow me to even leave the house let alone go somewhere that would inevitably expose him. Complaining wasn't an option either.

I had around thirty minutes of Ryan free time while he was out. There was no point trying to escape. Antonio had to come back soon. Surely he wouldn't just leave me here? Unless he actually had stopped caring for me. The second that thought entered my mind I felt a pain in my chest. No. He couldn't stop caring. Not now. Now that I finally was starting to care for him too. I needed him, he was the only person who'd ever cared about me. He could protect me, save me, love me.

Perhaps it would be the sudden splurge on alcohol and food that would alert him. No doubt Ryan would purchase plenty of things off of the no no list of things that I wasn't allowed to have. That being alcohol (plenty of it at that....). Plus Antonio would see from my tracker that I hadn't even left the house. Surely that would be enough to grab his attention. Then again I didn't even know if he was keeping an eye on my bank account. But if he had the effort to physically put a tracker inside of my body than he'd certainly have full access to my finances. In that case he'd most likely assume that I had been robbed and then I knew that his possessive instincts would take over.

"Get me another beer."

I frowned. He'd already had three and was starting to get rather aggressive. I knew that the fourth would be the difference between me having a pain free night and ending up in tears but did as I was told anyway. The best that I could do was push back the inevitable. If I got him his drink now then the beatings would be delayed instead of what would happen if I said no. In that case, he'd beat me now and then get a drink anyway. It didn't take much of a reason for Ryan to hurt me at the moment. He was angry at me for turning him in to the police and this was my punishment. The punishment for getting my abusive ex into prison to protect myself. It sounded ridiculous, I know. It was ridiculous but arguing never seemed to win me anything.

"Here you go."

I offered him a smile as he grunted and yanked the bottle out of my shaky hands. I was always shaking lately. I was constantly on edge, waiting for a explosion of pain to come at any moment. Ryan wasn't exactly predictable about when or where he'd strike me but once he did it didn't take long for me to collapse to the floor in agony.

I turned and began to head back to the kitchen when Ryan called me over to him.

"Where are you going? Come, sit here."

I lowered my aching body down next to him, just as he'd asked and waited for my next instruction like a dog.

"You do love me don't you Alice?"

No.

"Of course I do."

My voice was sickeningly sweet and fake but Ryan seemed to believe it. To be fair, so would I if I was that wasted.

"And you know how much I love you too, don't you."

You don't love me! That's what I wanted to scream but instead I said the exact opposite of what I was thinking in my head.

"Yes I do."

The lies where seeping out of me by the minute but it was the only thing saving me from more unnecessary pain.

I cringed when Ryan pressed his wet lips to mine, although I had no choice but to react to his vile kiss. His mouth was slimy and he stunk of the cheap beer that he'd been guzzling all day. I closed my eyes and focused on Antonio instead. I remembered the way he kissed me. The way that his warm lips and tongue entangled with mine in a sweet sign of affection. Antonio always smelt like his expensive cologne and tasted so sweet. Our kisses and sex was always such a euphoric experience, unlike with Ryan. It didn't take long for Ryan to pull away and usher me back off to the kitchen. Not before he delivered a harsh spank to my ass. I jumped from the surprise of both the pain and the loud sound that came from it.

"Ryan please! Please!"

I banged on the door of the bathroom, desperate for him to unlock it. I had tried locking myself in here during the first few days. But of course, it didn't take long for him to catch on to my tactic so he removed the lock and reattached it to the outside. That meant that he could now lock me inside instead. He knew that I'd never dare lock him inside, I knew that he could knock the door down with a few hits. But unlike Ryan, I wasn't strong enough to do that.

"Please....let me out..."

I let out one more drawn out plea that mixed with my sobs while I slid down the door and into my knees. He'd left me in here with only a towel meaning that I was in for a very cold and uncomfortable night.

I sobbed and clutched the towel, my only form of warmth, to my body. The dull light bulb hanged above my head, flickering every now and again. They were old and needed changing but I never got around to doing it. So now they just teased me about my pathetic state.

I stayed put with my back pressed against the door. I had debated running myself another warm bath to help me relax but decided against it. If Ryan came in to get me early I didn't want to be completely naked. That was enough to provoke him. He may even punish me for wasting water. I'd just have to wait it out.

My nightmares had been getting worse. I couldn't get to my meds either. I'd tried and Ryan found them. I told him the truth. That they were for my nightmares and he just said that it was a load of bullshit, that I didn't even need them. He said that I was just dramatic and an attention seeking bitch so he just threw them all away. In fact, he made me flush them all down the toilet, one by one, as he watched and laughed at me.

So now I had no choice but to deal with the interrupted nights. I wasn't worried about waking up Ryan like I was with Antonio though. Ryan could sleep through absolutely anything and even if he did on the off chance wake up, he'd probably be proud. He'd see it as an achievement, his torture had been that successful in terrifying me.

The tattoo had been the hardest thing to hide. I always had it covered with my clothes and then applied a layer of very heavy concealer, powder and foundation. I'd even hidden some in the bathroom so I could patch it up straight after showering with the secret stash. Besides, Ryan was so drunk most of the time that he didn't notice the cakey marks. Whenever we had sex the lights stayed off. I didn't want to have to explain the whole situation to him. Partly because he may actually kill me for being with another man in his absence, even if it was initially against my will, but also because I was afraid that he'd take me far away from here. I needed Antonio to come and get me as soon as possible.

However as the days went on I rapidly became more and more fearful that maybe something had happened to him. What if he'd been injured or worse....killed. No. He was ok. He had to be ok. He promised me.