Things at school were strange at first. When I woke up the monday after the party, Jack was waiting for me at the bus stop. Everything between us was normal again, like nothing had even happened. He still refused to tell me why he reacted so harshly, but I let it go. He said he'd tell me eventually.

On the bus, I rested my head on his shoulder and avoided eye contact with Finn when he got on a few stops later. Jack glared at him, and didn't respond when Finn waved in greeting.

"Forgive him. If I can, you can," I said, my head still leaning on Jack shoulder.

"No. What he did isn't ok."

"Jack, I'm serious. I can't let what happened between us ruin your friendship. We weren't meant to be anyway," I sighed. Jack rolled his eyes and didn't respond.

At lunch, Finn sat across from me, next to Ellie. Jack finally sat with us again, next to me. He didn't hesitate to take half of the quesadilla I had for lunch. We talked about school for a bit, and I kept trying to avoid eye contact with Finn. We'd split on somewhat good terms, but I couldn't help but feel awkward around him. I still wanted to be his friend, for some strange reason. My hand was lying lazily on the table, and Finn reached out and laid his hand over mine. I flinched back, looking at him with confusion.

"Shit, I'm sorry. It's a habit," he said apologetically.

"It's fine," I laughed nervously.

"Can we talk for a sec?" Jack burst suddenly, directing his question towards Finn. Finn nodded and got up, Jack following him. They settled down at an empty table nearby. Ellie and I watched them talk. Jack kept gesturing towards us, and Finn kept shaking his head.

"So you and Finn are over?" Ellie asked. It dawned on me that I had completely forgotten to fill her in on the events of the weekend.

"It's a long story," I responded. Ellie glanced at the clock, then back at me.

"We've got time. Tell me everything! The last time I saw you were going to the bathroom, then you and Jack disappeared, and I assumed... well- I don't know, just tell me!" I took a deep breath and began to tell her everything from the moment I'd left her. Retelling the whole Millie situation made my hands shake, but I didn't cry or anything. She was happy to learn Jack and I were officially back to best friends, and I didn't even have to confront him.

"First of all, Millie is such a fucking bitch, jesus fuck. I hate her so much." She shook her head, then continued. "I would tell you forgiving Finn right away is a terrible idea, but I did the same thing when we broke up. He's the type of person to treat you like shit and you'd forgive him in a heartbeat. And thank god you and Jack are back. I think it was hard for all of us to see you guys apart," she admitted. I grinned and glanced back over at the boys. They had just finished talking, and Finn got up, reaching over the table and pulling Jack in, embracing him.

"All good?" I asked as they returned to the table. Jack nodded and Finn smiled.

As the week progressed, their friendship became stable again. By friday, they left me behind in college prep and walked to the buses with each other. I didn't mind, it actually made me feel better that they were back on good terms. I was standing a few feet behind them, waiting for the bus to pick us up, with airpods in when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around, confused. Millie was standing behind me, her arms crossed, looking at me with cold eyes. I hadn't seen her since... the incident. I tried to stay calm, but anger surged into my head at the sight of her standing in front of me.

"What," I snapped, a little rudely.

"What have you said to Finn?" She asked in her annoying as fuck accent.

"I don't know what you're talking about, nor do I care," I sighed, turning back around. She grabbed my arm and pulled me back to face her again.

"He told me I can't hook up with him anymore. And I know you two broke up, so I know this is your fault," she said. I shook my head in disbelief. The word "anymore" implied they've been hooking up this whole time. I tried to ignore the sinking feeling in my chest.

"Millie, in case you haven't noticed, I was the one who was cheated on. I have nothing to do with Finn not wanting to get with you anymore. Maybe he realized how much of a bitch you were or something, but it's not my problem," I shrugged, beginning to walk away. I had gotten a few steps before I felt a sharp tug on my hair.

"Ouch, you bitch! What the fuck, Millie. Are you five years old?" I half-yelled, turning back around.

"Don't call me a bitch!" She said.

"You sound like a child. No wonder Finn was tired of you," I hissed, feeling satisfaction at the look of hurt on her face. I normally wasn't a bully, and I'd never say anything like that to anyone, but Millie was really pissing me off. She had the audacity to tell me that it was my fault Finn was done with her, after I was the one being cheated on. And she knew he had me and still let it happen. I knew it wasn't entirely her fault, and Finn was technically the one to blame, but the fact that she was acting like this made me more upset at her.

"What did you just say to me?" she demanded. I'd never seen her this mad before. It's not like I spent a lot of time with her or anything, but I never took her to be an angry person.

"I said, no wonder Finn is tired of you," I repeated. I saw her hand dart up, and felt a sharp sting on my cheek. Millie had slapped me.

"He wasn't tired of me last weekend. He's a really good kisser, don't you think?" Unable to control myself any longer, I stuck my arms out and pushed her. I didn't want to hurt her, and it barely did anything. She stumbled over before regaining her balance.

"That's it!" she yelled in her stupid accent. She lunged for me, grabbing my arms and pulling my hair.

"What the fuck! Get the fuck off me," I gasped, not wanting to fight back. I saw someone rush past me and as suddenly as she was on me, she was being pulled off.

Finn was holding her back as she fought to escape from his grasp. Jack was at my side, asking if I was ok.

"We all know you aren't over Finn," she sneered, still trying to break free of him.

"I don't even care about him anymore!" I yelled. "The only person I've ever cared about that way is J-" I stopped mid sentence. I felt everyone's eyes on me. We must have caused a commotion with our fight, or whatever you want to call it, because everyone in the general area had stopped what they were doing to watch us. I didn't know what to do so I did the first thing I could think of. I ran. I grabbed my books that had spilled onto the floor and took off. I heard Finn and Jack calling my name, but I didn't turn around.

I didn't stop until I was at my front door. I doubled over to catch my breath before throwing open the door and rushing to my room. I flopped on my bed, my heart still racing. What the fuck had just happened. What the fuck had I just said? I hadn't been thinking, and it just slipped out. I didn't want to admit what the end of my sentence was going to have been, but I knew. The only person I've ever cared about that way is Jack. I didn't mean to say it, but I had. But it was the truth. I sighed, letting realization wash over me.

I liked Jack. I had feelings for my best friend in the entire world. And I had no idea what to do about it.

I considered asking Ellie for help, but decided against it. I needed to figure this out on my own.

I came to the conclusion that I'd give myself a week. One week to sort everything out. If I still felt the same way after the time had passed, I'd act on it. If these stupid feelings managed to somehow go away, then great, I'd get to keep my best friend and nothing would have to change. My phone had been buzzing constantly during my compilation, and I finally check it. There were a few texts from Finn and Jack each.

Hey madison

Im REALLY fucking sorry about Millie

She had no right

I hope you're ok

thanks

im fine

Thank god

If you need anything I'm here

thanks

Are you ok????

Hello????

Madison???

If you dont respond I'm coming over

hi

im ok

Are you sure?

I can come over if you want

im fine

thanks jack

Anytime

Love u

i love you

too