Evan didn't really answer my question, he very discreetly avoided it and bid me goodnight. But his words has left my thoughts into a spiral that doesn't seem to stop. Something about it makes me avoid him on Thursday morning at lockers. I don't even stop by them, I go straight to Biology where Ms. Kaur hands us a pop quiz to do.

A feeling of guilt has been constantly nagging me ever since I talked to him, and that leads me to avoid Chris as well. I quickly finish my sheet and submit it to Ms. Kaur and make some dumb excuse to get out early. She buys it, because she has to be the sweetest teacher.

Since my next few classes have both Chris and Evan in it, apart from Chemistry, I go straight ahead to the ground and lawn area of the school. I lie down behind the blossoming flowers, away from anyone's eyes. But then a shuffling noise startles me immensely.

I look up to find Breanna staring down at me, her face upside down since I'm laying on the ground.

"Thought I might find you here." She says, coming to lie down beside me.

"Aren't you supposed to be in your history class?" I ask.

"Aren't you supposed to be in Calculus class?" She retorts, making me smile a little.

"Touché."

She turns towards me, "What's been going on with you, Adri? I'm kinda worried."

Breanna became my friend freshmen year as soon as we were made chemistry lab partners. We bonded over how our names rhymed, and when she invited me over at her house for pie, I couldn't exactly say no. Ever since then, we've pretty much been attached to hip. This girl has been there for me endlessly as I have been for her.

"Evan and Rose broke up." I blurt, turning to see her widened eyes, looking at me with surprise.

"What?" She gasps but then relaxes immediately, "They'll patch up again. It's their on-and-off thing."

I turn to her completely, lying on my side, "That's the thing, Bri! He made it very clear that he was done with her." I groan, trying to make sense of his words.

"Why?"

"He said, and I quote, 'Do you really need to ask, An?' What the fuck does that even mean?" I say, looking at her for some sort of guidance and answer.

"Holy shit." She breathes and I nod.

It's shit alright.

She looks up at the sky, sunlight beaming through the branches of trees before she speaks up, "He broke up for you, please tell me you know that." She says, sounding a little worried and unsure at the same time.

I frown, sitting up, "I'm sorry, did I hear you right? He broke up for me? The hell does that mean, I never asked him to!" I throw my hands in the air out of pure exasperation.

Breanna carefully sits up as well, "Babe, you didn't have to. The fiasco of you sleeping with Chris must've done something." She thinks out aloud making me glare at him.

"I didn't sleep with him." I correct her out.

"Yeah, but you're planning to."

Her words make a blush rise up in my cheeks and for a second I wish I was a normal human being who didn't turn red at the most inconvenient times.

"So not. And that's not the issue here!" I say and she smiles at me sadly.

"Just when I think things are working out for you, someone does something."

Well, isn't that right. Just when I was starting to think that Chris and I are working out greatly together, Evan drops his break-up bomb. It shouldn't effect me, it really shouldn't but I can't help but think over Breanna's words.

Did he really leave Rose because somehow I'm the reason?

Breanna distracts me by changing the topic, "By the way, Dad loved Luke." She grins, her happy aura making me beam at her.

"That's great. What about Evelyn?" I ask.

She groans, "I don't think she'll ever approve, not that I care. I just don't want her to feed bullshit to Dad."

I nod in understanding as we continue to talk about her and the latest school gossip which she fills me in with. Caitlyn and her minions are quiet these days, which is kind of weird for them, but I'm glad they are out of my life.

After the bell for lunch rings, Breanna forcefully drags me to the cafeteria but I skip taking a tray for myself as we sit down on the table. Chris, Evan and Jordan come strolling together through the doors, almost every girl ogling them and a sense of frustration runs through me when I notice Caitlyn roaming her eyes particularly around Evan.

When they reach the table, I avoid his gaze but Jordan offers me a fist bump, so I do that with a smile on my face. Chris takes a seat by my side and immediately turns to me.

"Why weren't you in any of the classes?" He asks, concern in his tone very clear.

"Were you having sex with the guy for whom you went on the pill?" Jordan teases, looking proud of himself but earns a smack on his head as Chris leans over to do so.

"Well?" Luke asks, looking between his girlfriend and me.

I shrug, not wanting to respond but even if I wanted to, Caitlyn would've beat me to it as she comes to our table. Her heels click on the floor, the sound annoying me as she comes to take the empty seat between Jordan and Evan.

"That's Rose's seat." Jordan says, clearly as annoyed as I feel.

His response causes Caitlyn to smirk, "She wouldn't be sitting with you guys anymore now, would she?" She taunts, her question directed towards Evan whose jaw tightens as he glares at her.

"What's she talking about? Where's Rose?" Luke asks Evan.

When he doesn't reply, the bitch takes it upon herself to do that, "They broke up."

"What?" Chris yells, almost catching the attention from everyone and I gulp, trying not to meet anyone's eyes as I keep my gaze focused on the table.

"What he means to ask is, why?" Jordan says on behalf of his best friend.

At this, I finally look up at Evan, hoping to get an answer which I didn't receive earlier. A breath leaves me when I notice that he's already staring at me, his gaze so intense that I almost fidget in my seat.

"Things weren't working out." He says, his eyes not leaving mine which sends an extremely unsettling feeling in my stomach, compelling me to look away.

When my gaze moves to Chris, his body is rigid as his eyes hold a deathly glare directed at Evan. Hesitantly I keep my hand on top of his and his head jerks in my direction. His jaw twitches as his eyes don't even lose a moment of temper.

"Well, I guess you broke up with her after all." Caitlyn clicks her tongue, following Evan's gaze at me.

I send her a deathly glare, "Is that all you live off? Stop pushing your nose somewhere it doesn't and would never belong. But wait, you might be doing this because you want to feel better about your own break up."

Jordan tries to hide his smile while Evan just keeps staring at me. I don't even look at Chris because I don't think I can handle the rage radiating off of him right now. Breanna has been silent and something tells me, that was enough to shut up Luke as well.

Caitlyn scoffs at my words, "Why am I not surprised that you have a comeback ready? You're a home-wrecker, you realise that?" She smirks, for the first time leaving me utterly speechless as I stare at her.

"If you don't leave this table in two seconds, I'm going to forget about all the feminist shit and smack you really hard." Evan warns her, his persona changing into absolutely angry one as he registers her words.

She rolls her eyes before getting up from the table and walking off. I mouth a 'thank you' to Evan who returns his comforting smile back to me before Chris clears his throat, drawing my attention and arching an eyebrow at me.

"What?" I ask, still trying to get Caitlyn's words out of my head. She doesn't even know me, and yet she managed to get to me.

He sighs, taking ahold of my hand under the table and intertwining our fingers together, "Don't let her get to you." He quietly says, kissing the side of my head and I offer him a nod, mindlessly.

But I appreciate how he tries to comfort me because he knows she somehow got to me. The rest of the lunch hour goes off silently, mostly in awkward silence and the air is so thick that it could actually be cut from a butter knife. Jordan and Luke try to initiate conversations to no one's avail.

Before the bell rings, I'm the first to get away from the table and I'm not surprised when I feel Evan trailing behind me.

"We need to talk." He says, and I continue to walk like I didn't hear him. "An, please."

I come to a halt, turning around as I cross my arms across my chest, "Talk." I throw my hands in the air.

He lets out a frustrated groan, "Come with me."

I shake my head, "I've already skipped half the day, I'm not skipping any more classes." I tell him but he just rolls his eyes as he takes my hand and leads me to another building and eventually to the gym.

"Please sit down." He motions to the stairs and I suppress myself from rolling my eyes as I sit down, folding my legs underneath me and he comes to sit one step down below me, turning around to look up at me.

"What?" I say, frustrated with this whole situation.

"Why the hell are you mad at me?" He asks, sounding innocent which only aggravates me further.

I scoff, "Well, what the hell do you expect me to be when you've been pretending since yesterday that you broke up with her because of me!" I yell at him, not caring how my voice echoes in the empty space.

He frowns, "You think I'm pretending?" His eyes search for mine as he tries to close his hand on mine but I jerk it away, "We did break up because things weren't working out, but they weren't working out because you are in the picture."

"Excuse me?" I glare at him, sounding pissed as hell, "That sounds very accusatory to me, considering I did nothing to begin with!"

He doesn't even blink as he shoots back, "You slept with him!"

I stand up, needing the urge to be away from him because I don't want to end up slapping him. "For fuck's sake, I didn't sleep with him." I point my finger at his face, "And even if I did, Evan, it's none of your fucking business!"

He mirrors my actions as he stands up as well, taking one step ahead and hovering over me as we stand on the same level.

"It fucking is." His voice is low, but pissed as he continues, "I can tolerate the fact that you are dating him, and I can even manage to go without punching him when you kiss him. But you don't sleep with him!"

"Why the hell not, Evan!" I yell, pushing at his chest but he doesn't even budge, he just comes to stand closer as his nose touches mine.

"Because.." He trails off, his eyes searching mine.

His face leans forward, but before his lips can meet mine, I turn my face away and they end up smashing against my cheek.

"An, please." He begs, his arms coming around my waist as he pulls me closer and my body flushes against his.

The tears that I've been fighting for so long finally start dropping down my eyelashes but I can't even move my hands to wipe them away. His words and actions have knocked me out of my way, leaving me on a trail of path that is totally unknown to me and I feel so much at loss, not knowing how to find my way back.

"I can't cheat on him, Ev." I whisper, hugging him back as I rest my head on his chest, "I won't."

I feel him nodding as he breathes in my hair, "That wasn't fair to you, I'm sorry." He whispers.

"What's going on, Evan?" I ask, gathering the guts to pose a question I don't really want an answer to.

He scoffs, "I realise how I've been talking about 'the one' with you from so long, when all this time I'm the one who's been blind." He says, his hold tightening around me.

A part of me is thankful that I'm not looking at his face because it would honestly wreck me to see the emotions in his eyes. But it's still wrecking me apart as I can hear his heartbeat as clear as a day with my ear pressing against his chest.

"I like him, Evan. A lot more than I actually convey." I whisper, trying to make a sense out of my own emotions which feel like they have been tramped over.

He lets go of me, making me miss the comfort of his embrace almost immediately as my heart craves more. He gives me a small smile, a sad smile which almost breaks my heart when I see the vulnerability in his eyes.

"I know. I didn't break up with Rose so I could chase you or anything. Remember I told you I needed time to figure my feelings out? I have — they are for you. God, An.. I just want you to know that, and I don't expect you to leave him and be with me, because that's not fair to anyone. But I wish I had realised things sooner.." he cocks his head to side, his thumb coming up to wipe my tears as more leave.

How is this possible that the words that I've been dying to hear from last four years are being said to me right now and instead of running right into his arms, I'm thinking about the guy who has been an asshole to me at times, yet has managed to steal a huge part of my heart?

"I wish that too." I whisper, because I would do anything for Evan to say these things to me before I bumped into Chris that day in hallway.

If my feelings for Chris weren't as real as they have been for Evan, I would've dumped his ass as selfish as that sounds and gotten with my best friend whom I've been pining over for so long. But, I can't! Not when Chris is involved.

"Don't tell him anything, let me talk to him, alright? I don't want you to be answerable to your boyfriend because of me." He says and I'm about to argue when he shakes his head at me so I hesitantly agree.

•••

well, at least I updated even though it's technically another day. xD

anyway, thoughts of the story so far?

vote. comment. support. x