This person is depressed and doesn't know how to feel again.

Answered Submission

Hey!

This advice might be a little long but I hope you read every bit of it and apply it in your life.

Honestly, even if no one shows it, every single person you walk by has experienced depression in one form or another. From what you stated, you feel under appreciated, unloved, and worthless. However, this is because you’ve been craving for appreciation and love from other people. Have you ever tried to love yourself? It may seem stupid, but give it a try.

Personally, I once hated myself and considered myself to be pretty toxic. Earlier last year, I found a K-pop group that helped me love and appreciate myself more. They made me realise both my good points and my bad points. It helped me accept that I was bad in some manners, and that I had to improve on those. In a similar way, I would like you to sit down and think of all the bad regrets you have. Don’t just sit on them, work to improve those things. Apologize to your parents if you’ve ever raised your voice at them, apologize to the person you still don’t like, apologize to yourself for being mean towards your body. Accept yourself. You are human, you make mistakes, and you grow. You have bad, and you have good. Now try to focus on becoming more good.

How does this all connect with depression? Once you realise your own self worth, and that no one but yourself should be the judge of you. You will realise your depression has gotten better.

Loving yourself aside, learn to love and appreciate small things as well. If your mom makes dinner for you, thank her. Your friend cracking a random unfunny joke, simply laugh. The cat meowing is cute, give her some food. Try visiting orphanages and volunteer there; go to a neighbor’s house and ask them how they’ve been. Notice even smaller things you like: maybe you like writing with pencils instead of pens, airplane sounds, the clicking of your shoes, appreciate silently in your heart that your parents bought you a good shirt. Small things accumulate and count as big things.

Learn to look at yourself and love yourself, don’t bother craving for someone else’s comments. Appreciate the small things in life and you’ll go a long way in life. Don’t try to go on Instagram and look at everyone else’s perfect life and crave material things. Focus on what you already have and be grateful. Try practicing mindfulness and implementing it in your daily life. Interact with people you like and don’t like; it helps you realise more about your personality. Try doing random acts of kindness, like giving out chocolates to random kids, smiling at random people in your class, kissing your parents on their cheeks and hugging them. Appreciate what you’ve been given, and depression has no chance to live in your mind.

I hope you get better soon! If you have more questions, please ask again.

Thank you,

The Advice Column Team