This person is confused about if they should inform their friends about their sexuality or not.

Hey!

It’s very common to have people that are against other sexualities are you and though it should not be common, you can’t tell someone straight up that their beliefs are wrong. Everyone thinks they’re right in what they believe and difference in opinion is valid.

However, if they’re very much against homosexuality, then I would advise you not to tell them, at least not yet. Since you should consider the fact that even if you tell them and while some might accept your sexuality, one or two of your friends might not accept it and even spread it around to other people. I am not saying your friends are bad people and might do that, but there is a chance of them forcing your coming out and spreading the word to others and I don’t think you would want that. Coming out should be your choice and it should be with people that make you feel safe and comfortable. While your friends are close to you, I think you should delay your coming out to them. This isn’t deceiving them, this is your choice and your right.

Until then, you can try to post subtle posts in support of the LGBTQ+ community and try to show them that having a different sexual identity does not change your personality or affect any relationship between friends. This could be done by introducing them to good LGBTQ+ books, movies, shows. If they can post things against it, you can post things to support it. If they confront you about it, just say that you have online friends that are a part of LGBTQ+ and would like to support them.

However, keep in mind that they also have the right to have different opinions and beliefs. If they’re completely set on believing that being a part of LGBT+ community is wrong, then no matter what you do, you’ll only be wasting your time and effort. It might be hurtful but not everyone can accept it and while that seems wrong to us, to them, it seems alright. Your sexuality is valid, you are valid but you have no control over what other people think of you.

However, despite everything, if you still want to come out to them about your sexuality, then you can because it’s your choice to do so.

But please reconsider and think twice about coming out to your close friends. I think you should do it with people that are more open-minded towards LGBTQ+ and accepting of the community. Have a great pride month!

Thank you,

The Advice Column Team