《DELIRIUM》15
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"Good afternoon, Brandon. Nice to see you after this weekend,"
I watched the man before me and I inspected his movements. His cheeks were rosy and his eyes were glazed and red. Had he been crying?
His body was almost showing through his white attire and while I waited for him to say something I watched the details of the skin of his already exposed arms.
Suddenly I spotted a red, open, bloody little new wound on the back of his wrist.
He had done it again.
I got sad by the information and that I was wrong about the thoughts that maybe I was the reason to why he didn't do it anymore after our sessions started.
"Did something happen this weekend, Brandon?" I asked with concern in my voice.
Brandon looked at me and pierced his gaze into mine. By now I wasn't afraid of him. I just felt bad for him and wanted to comfort him. I had never seen that look on his face before.
"I missed you," His voice was lower than ever and he almost didn't sound like himself.
"What?"
"I FUCKING MISSED YOU!"
I got scared of him again and the guard walked towards him to give him a warning. Brandon snatched his arm from the guard's grip and looked at him with an angry face.
My heart was racing from the shock of his shoutout. What did he mean by saying that? He didn't have the capacity to feel.
"It's okay," I said while I looked at the guard and he nodded his head in comprehension. I walked over to the edge of the bed and carefully sat down with bended knees in front of him.
I didn't dare to touch him even though I wanted to.
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"Brandon, please talk to me,"
He was hugging his knees with his head buried between them. When he noticed that I was that close to him, he carefully looked up so that I could only see his tear-filled eyes. I really wondered what made him react that way.
He was usually stone-cold against everyone.
"I told you, Beverly!" The sadness in his voice didn't even make me think a little bit about telling him to not call me that.
"Did you do that to yourself because you missed me?" I dared to ask only because I needed to know, and if it was true, he probably wouldn't try to hurt me anyway.
"Yes,"
Once again his eyes penetrated my mind and I felt like I was blinded. Ever since the first time I saw him, I had felt like he put a spell over me with the use of only his eyes.
Time after time, my body was reacting the same way when I was around him and I couldn't seem to find the reason why.
Another thing I couldn't understand was that he actually had hurt himself again because he missed me. It had to be some other reason behind it as well. He couldn't be so attached to me already? He couldn't be attached at all?
"Do you know why you feel that way?" I kept a lower voice and carefully asked my question. We had to get forward with this to be able to do something about it.
"No, because I haven't felt it before,"
Brandon's face was now completely showing and a little smile appeared over his plump, pink lips. I got a little happier myself when I saw him smile again.
I smiled back at him and I finally dared to lay my hand on his arm. His body twitched and I reacted in the same way. I was still reserved even if I dared to be that close to him.
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I decided to respond to him in a simple and understanding way.
"Okay, I see,"
He looked at my hand that was placed on his arm and he took a deep breath and exhaled heavily.
"I just know that I need you," He said.
My heart started to race a hundred miles an hour due to the words that came out of that criminal's mouth. He didn't know what he was feeling himself because he was sick and in a different mind state than normal people.
Presumably, this was only a part of his game and all of this was just an act from his side. I knew that he was manipulative and a great actor, because he was a psychopath.
"Can I ask you if you took your medication today, Brandon?"
"I don't need any fucking medication to know that I need you, Beverly!" Once again I reacted when he raised his voice at me and I took my hand off his arm and took a step back away from him. The guard walked over to Brandon again but I stopped him earlier this time.
"Leave him alone he hasn't done anything," I said to him and the man took a quick step back.
It was true that Brandon didn't do anything wrong, so it was just unnecessary in my opinion for the guard to make a move against him. That would probably just make him more frustrated and stressed out.
It was so unusual to see him like this, even if I had only known him for a week.
I almost didn't want to believe that it was actually just an act. He was emotional for real and I could see through it. That wasn't a sign of psychopathy as far as I knew...
After this, I almost started to believe that his diagnose was incorrectly developed. Because this was something else. He had strong emotions and I could tell that it was a hundred percent true.
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