I sat on the couch, a little bare, empty and very much alone.

Married life shows you how alone you actually feel when your other half is not there. Before, it was covered up, you don't even realise because your life hasn't changed so drastically.

But as I sat there, lonely and cold, I realised that my life had changed drastically, even more so than I would have thought possible.

Nearly a year down the line and I've lost the cold hearted mother I had, now she was in another home for treatment. I'm married, I lost my father and I'm pregnant.

I wasn't the young teenage girl I was before, I was growing up and there always came positives and negatives to life. I just so happened to have the right balance so far.

Even so, my heart was still beating out of its chest as I kept replaying the scene in my mind. The situation was just too raw, too soon. I couldn't function whilst my mind was drowning.

I couldn't just sit here, on this couch like nothing had happened. I couldn't sit here and wait for kyle to return. I couldn't just sit here.

I felt bound but I knew I had the power to move. I had to at least do something.

He needed time, but I needed answers.

I got up from my sitting position to quickly grab my phone. I would call a cab, but what's the point when I could call Matt?

The amount of times I've had to use him for something; comfort, his father and also transport...I was beginning to feel guilty, as if I was taking advantage of him.

I didn't want it to be like that, and I knew he wouldn't think anything of it. Matt wasn't perfect, but he was always there for me. Always. More so than I could ever be.

It also just goes to show how many problems arise whilst in marriage.

I called Matt to ask if he could take me somewhere, not going in to too much detail but telling him kyle had gone.

It seemed weird, but I knew where kyle would have left to. He always told me he loved this hotel that was situated down town. He told me he always went there before we got together as a get away. I didn't know why or really what for, I guess I never asked.

I was positive kyle went there, it must have been the only place.

Matt turned up ten minutes later and I dragged my self over to his car. I got in quietly.

Matt didn't even have to greet me as he sped down the road, he knew I wasn't really in the mood for small talk.

I didn't know what I was doing, I was a fool really, but I wasn't always the one to sit there and wait, or watch, or let it hurt me until I hurt no more. I had to sort it out.

Matt already knew where I wanted him to take me. He did so without question.

"You'll be okay, baby girl?" Matt asked as soon as he parked the car in front of the hotel. I nodded my head his way before pecking his cheek as a thank you and getting out of his car.

The hotel was large, made of bricks and glass and was extremely warm and inviting. I had only been there once before.

Matt said his goodbyes before speeding back down the road. He waited until I was inside.

I wasn't really dressed for the occasion, but right now I had more things on my mind, such as my challenging husband. He was going to be the death of me, I swore by it.

I walked up to the reception desk before laying my elbows on to the top of the counter.

The receptionist in front of me had blonde highlighted hair and pale pink lips. She wore a locket around her neck and the usual uniform.

"How can I help?" She smiled my way warmly and I smiled in return.

"Has a Kyle Knight signed in by any chance?" I asked her with a sheepish expression. I didn't want to sound stupid, especially is he hadn't actually come here.

The lady looked down at the bookings which weirdly was by book and not on computer. She scanned down the page before looking up.

"He has. He's in room 212. Is he your boyfriend?" Her head was cocked to the side slightly. It gave off the impression that she was curious, not nosey.

"Husband." I stated. We were young so it was only right for her to assume we were together that way, little did she know how connected we really were. She didn't even look a little taken back. She just nodded and smiled again.

"Cute. You may go up if you like. Take the elevator on the left." She pointed to her right, which was my left and I smiled her way before going.

The elevator seemed to take longer to get to the top than anything I've been in before. Kyle had only left an hour ago, but now, I was feeling the nerves. My heart was beating wildly; I was alive, but empty.

As soon as the elevator pinged, I'm sure my heart went with it. Just as I was about to walk out of the elevator, I bumped in to a body I knew all too well.

"What are you doing here?" Kyle asked as he took hold of my shoulders, stopping me from falling backwards. He looked down at me and took a step back.

His eyes seemed red, redder than they were before he left. His hair seemed a mess and I couldn't believe how much his appearance changed even in the hour.

"I need answers." I said firmly. He was going to tell me this time. We had to communicate, we had to work through this not just run away from eachother.

"Cali...not now." He gritted through his teeth. He seemed to be getting angry and I wasn't even going to think about backing down now.

I didn't know what I was doing but I had to do something.

"Yes now!" I hissed. I didn't want others hearing us, I didn't want to seem like that couple.

"No, Cali. I told you to leave me be."

"Well I can't. You're my husband for fuck sake!" My voice was getting louder and I knew it. But he aggravated me, so much I just wanted to hit some sense in to him. I needed him to tell me what the matter was. I needed to help, at least to try and do something.

"Be fucking quiet." He whispered harshly before grabbing me by the elbow and pulling me to his room. He flung his keys from out of his pocket and opened the door swiftly. He pulled my inside.

"Get off me!" I barked out. He did as he was told. He lodged his hands in to his hair angrily before pulling his hands down.

"A couple of days I asked for and you can't even give me that." He shook his head. I shrinked back a little. It felt as if I couldn't give him his space, what if I was suffocating him? That wasn't my intention at all.

"Look-"

"No, you look! You don't know next to nothing at the moment. You can't even give me fucking space when I ask for it. Are you that selfish?" He barked out. I shrinked back even further. Kyle was never this aggressive verbally.

He stepped forward until his face was near mine. I looked to him, my heart beating faster and faster as I looked to him. What was he doing?

"You're a selfish, ignorant woman." He let out. I could now smell the hint of alcohol coming from his mouth. He was obviously a little intoxicated. No wonder why he was being so mean.

My eyes welled up but he moved before he could see it.

"Have you been drinking?" I asked through the lump in my throat. What was happening to us?

"What's it to you?" He moved over to the mini bar which was by the tv. He got his glass and laid it to his lips.

I wanted to snatch the glass away but I was too afraid.

I was afraid of my own husband like this. I was scared for the words which might tumble out of his mouth. I know he'd never hurt me or the baby, but I didn't want to risk anything especially looking at the state of him now.

"Kyle, tell me what's wrong." I demanded. Kyle looked to me but didn't say a word. His eyes were emotionless, empty. "Kyle please." I let out desperately.

"Leave me alone." He pointed to the door but I shook my head.

"No. You'll tell me what's the matter." I was really hoping he would.

"For fuck sake." He whispered as he rolled his eyes.

"Tell me, now." I asked firmly. Please, Kyle, come on.

"Shut up." He demanded as he took another sip of his drink. His knuckles were clenched as if it was taking all he had to stop himself exploding.

"Just tell me Kyle!" I shouted, finally having enough. I was angry.

"I have depression! I have fucking depression and I want you to leave me alone!" He shouted, his face red as he shouted my way. I dropped my arms and looked to him with shock. My mouth was opening but I didn't know what to say.

"What?" I breathed.

"I have depression and I don't know why. I have everything I could ever want, I have you and a baby on the way and I'm depressed! How does that even work? How can I feel like this?" He closed his eyes briefly as if trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Kyle-"

"No!" He screamed before throwing the glass across the room until it smashed in to pieces behind me. "Now look what you made me do!"

"Kyle-" I tried to control him, to console him but he moved backwards. The tears were falling and I didn't know which way to go.

Kyle was depressed. Depressed for god sake. That wasn't something to be ashamed of. Why couldn't he let me help him?

I tried to reach out to him, but he wouldn't let me. He was shaking with anger, and I know now that it was mostly because of himself, not because he was angry at me.

"Get the fuck out!" He said before moving forward and turning me around roughly. He pushed me until I was by the door.

"Kyle no! Let me help you!" I screamed as he opened the door.

"I need to be left alone. I don't want you here." He nudged me through the door, enough to get me out of the room but not hard enough to make me fly forward.

I turned around, trying to get back inside but Kyle slammed the door before I could.

I continued to shout as I banged on the door. My hands were turning red as I kept going.

"Kyle!" I screamed through the oak door. "Kyle!"

I tried and I tried but he just wouldn't open up. With anger and disappointment, I knew I had lost. I had lost a battle I was sure I could have won if he'd let me.

"If you don't open this door I'm not coming back." I finalised. After saying that, I hoped he would open the door and take me in to his arms. Tell me he was sorry, tell me that he loved me.

But he never did.

The door stayed closed and it felt as if my heart was shattering right there and then.

"Don't even bother running back to me. I'm not going to bother trying to fight for someone who can't be arsed to put the effort back in! I know you're not yourself but I won't be your punching bag. I'm done with you!" I screamed before walking away from that large oak door.

My heart felt heavier than the door itself. It seemed heavier than my body weight. It felt as if I couldn't walk without my knees wanting to buckle from beneath me.

I took hold of my phone to call Matt once again. He answered after the second ring.

"Cal-"

"Come and get me, Matt, please." I spluttered down the phone. "I need you. We need to get away from here."

"I'm on my way."

-----------------

Can always count on Matty :)

Sorry it's late! !

I know You'll hate this chapter and I'm sorry but it had to be done:( poor Kyle, but then poor Cali too!