"Dude, sit down for a second. You look so pale.."

"I'm sorry." My voice sounded agitated as I sat down on the slippery ground, leaning against the big mirror, "I can't seem to concentrate. I need to focus. Let's practice—"

"Practice can wait." Heeseung joined and sat down next to me, smiling warmly, "What's up?"

"Heartbreak."

"Ni-ki." I warned the younger, almost glaring at him to shut him up, "It's just...Things got too busy these days and I lost contact to a friend of mine."

"She cut ties with him. About a week ago."

"Ni-ki!" I warned him again, looking down as my heart clenched, remembering.

"That doesn't sound too good..." Jay furrowed his eyebrows.

"Why? Is it because you are an idol?"

"No. She doesn't know that I am." I confidently shook my head, "I don't know why she blocked me...but I'm really worried for her."

Sunghoon looked serious. "And we are worried about you. Go rest and if possible get checked by a doctor while you are at it. This seems serious."

"There's no need." I immediately looked away, sweat dripping down my forehead, "And I'm sorry, guys. I will try to be more focused from now on."

"It's fine." Jay smiled, patting my shoulder, "Now go home after passing by the doctor. Or we will have to bring you there."

"But—"

"No buts."

"Geez, okay." I laughed and dragged myself up, feeling even more tired all of a sudden, "I will see you guys at the dorm then. Thank you."

"Go get checked!"

"Whatever." I laughed it off, grabbing my towel.

That day, I didn't go to the doctor.

I felt guilty for not practicing as much as the others, feeling like I'm lacking and slacking off.

So, I decided to go practice more at night.

When no one was there to nag me.

I knew the others just wanted to help. And I appreciated it a lot.

But I had to put on a performance for our fans.

No matter how tired I was.

I wanted our fans to be satisfied, not disappointed because I was sad because of what happened with Ji.

I needed to do well.

"My heart thirsts because of you. Like a fever, fever, fever..." I hummed to myself, frowning dissatisfied at my reflection. Sighing, I felt my eye lids closing against my will as I shook my head again.

I wasn't doing as well as I used to do.

Hours and hours seemed to have passed by and I didn't notice the time till I reached the third track of our upcoming album.

My arms hurt, my head too. I breathlessly grabbed my water bottle, losing my vision for a split of a second.

Letting myself drop to the ground, I looked up to the ceiling, my chest heaving.

That's when my mind travelled to her. Like it always did, even if I didn't want it to.

I was worried, since I had absolutely no information about how she was doing.

Was she doing okay?

Was she sick? Was she feeling better?

Was she alone?

Did she do something?

My heart dropped. What if she did something to herself? What if I wasn't there for her when she needed me the most?

What if the usual happened again?

I suddenly felt the urge to jump to my shoes again, feeling determined to continue practicing to distract myself.

I continued to dance and dance and dance, till my mind was free.

And just when I thought my mind was at ease, my vision suddenly became blurry.

But even then, I didn't stop dancing, I couldn't.

I was afraid I would think of her again.

I was afraid I would fall behind the others if I didn't practice enough.

Little did I know that I would lose the control of my whole entire body.

As darkness seemed to engulf me whole.

But hey, at least I wouldn't think of her while being blacked out, right?

"Hello? Hey!"

The girl snapped out of it, immediately shaking her head. It was then when she realized where she was.

At her job. Convenience store 2.

"Oh, right. I-I'm sorry." Ji immediately apologized, quickly picking up the items to scan them.

"It's fine!" One of the girl's said.

Glancing at the costumers in front of her, Ji noticed.

It was the same group of teenagers from a while ago.

The enhypen fans.

"Thank you for your purchase." Ji smiled politely, looking at the costumers intensely. Phone cases, photo cards, stickers and their whole bags were just screaming enhypen or kpop fans in general.

Who knows? If Ji wasn't the way she was, maybe she would have become a kpop fan too.

"Guys, guys...look!" One of them shrieked, pointing at her phone as she showed her friends something.

The girl behind the cash desk was growing curious.

But before she would obtain more information about what was shocking them so much, they had already left.

Ji sighed in exhaustion, letting herself drop to her uncomfortable seat.

What was she still doing here?

She would then look at her calendar, glancing at all the days she still had to go through, counting them.

And there was another thing that bothered her.

What were the girls so shocked about?

Ji shook her head, groaning as she thought of Jungwon again.

"Not again..." She mumbled after making sure no one was in the shop. The girl's chest tightened. Was he sad that she blocked him? Shocked? Surprised? Relieved?

She wouldn't know.

And she couldn't look it up either.

That's when she shook her head again.

Ji was sure that she did the right thing by blocking him. Blocking him will help him have more time to focus on his fans and life.

She wouldn't bother him. Or traumatize him anymore.

Everything was how it used to be.

But the girl couldn't help but feel dejected, letting her head drop onto the cash desk.

Why did he have to make her so attached?

"I...just have to." Her hands were burning as she grabbed her phone, quickly typing in enhypen.

This time with the right spelling.

The curiosity was killing her.

Scrolling down a few fansites and ticket purchase links, her attention was drawn.

BELIFT LAB ANNOUNCES ENHYPEN'S JUNGWON TO TAKE TEMPORARY HIATUS FROM ACTIVITIES

The girl gasped, the same way her costumers did just now as she quickly read through the article, feeling her breath quickening.

Collapse, overworked, doctor's diagnosis.

Ji was unable to proceed, feeling worry take over her.

What happened? There weren't any details nor was anything on the internet stating how his condition was right now.

Was he in the hospital?

Ji looked around, feeling helpless. Sweat dripped down her forehead.

That's when it struck me.

She still had his number!

Without hesitance, she opened her text messages, tapping on the first chat at the top.

But...she blocked him.

Did she even have the right to reach out to him again?

"Fuck it."

_

jungwon

tell me, are you doing that on purpose?

:

do what?

make me worried

even though I've decided to leave your ass behind

:

no but

:

i'm glad it worked

:

i missed you ji