5:55 am

Stefan's Manor

O L L I E

When I heard the door click, I slowly got up and fixed my clothes. I think I know what Stefan meant when he said urgent business... or rather, who. I'm still conflicted. A part of me wants to follow Stefan and make sure that he won't get hurt again but the thought of seeing Bryce again was enough to make me tremble.

I knew about Bryce. Stefan told me that Bryce was in the basement, and he doesn't want me to see what he was about to do to him. What I told Stefan was true. I am a believer in karma, and I don't care about what happens to Bryce from here on. But something inside of me is urging me to go to the basement and watch. That I should not remain scared and it's finally time to conquer my demons.

I admit that the trauma is still there, and I know that going there could backfire on me, but I need to do this. I won't give Bryce the power to inflict pain and fear on me anymore. These are the moments when I thank Isaac for being my therapist.

Yes, Stefan helped get me through most of my attacks, but being able to understand my fear and anxieties from the point of view of a professional is even better. I'm just glad that Isaac finds time for me to squeeze in his very tight schedule.

According to Isaac, it would help me move on from my trauma if I keep connected with people who understand and accept me. I don't have to talk about the entire experience, per se, but socializing with people in a safe environment will help me a lot. That's the effect of Stefan on me; he gave me a sense of safety and security. Moreover, he treats me like I'm the most important person in the world.

Honestly, it was Isaac who learned the whole truth about my trauma and abuse. I was apprehensive, of course, but Isaac dispelled my doubts by being honest and open. I reciprocated by telling him what happened to me. It was hard, painful, and scary, but I was able to tell it all. Recalling that traumatic experience felt like I was reliving it all over again. Isaac remained patient and was strict about doctor-patient confidentiality.

I was going to tell Stefan everything, eventually. I was just finding the right moment, and I did it gradually. My miscalculation was that he would listen to the audio file. I should've expected it, knowing how Stefan wants to know all of me to make sure that I'm alright and happy.

I climbed down from the bed and entered the dressing room, pulling a hoodie and some sweatpants, then wore my loafers. I took a deep breath and put my hands in the front pocket of my hoodie. I walked out of the closet and left our room, closing the door behind me.

The structure and design of this house still amaze me. It's simple, yet screams class and elegance through the carefully chosen furniture and decors. Thank goodness Stefan toured me around the house so it was easy for me to navigate throughout.

When I finally reached the bottom of the stairs, I turned left and opened the 'secret door'. I wonder why it was a secret door when it was so obvious. It kind of defeats its purpose. I thought at first that it was a storage room, but Stefan corrected me and told me that its the way to the basement.

I opened the door and ascended the stairs, a long hallway at the bottom, wall lamps on the side. The concrete walls were painted gray. I feel like walking in those creepy hallways inside those horror films. There were specks of dust everywhere, cobwebs on the ceiling and the lamps, and a single steel door straight ahead.

All of a sudden, my heart rate picked up. I stepped backward; it feels like some outside force was sucking away my courage the nearer I get to the door.

You can do this Ollie. You can do this.

I filled my lungs with oxygen and repeated my mantra over and over. I have read once that since feelings are intangible, if you say you want to have them, then you can. If you want confidence or bravery, you can have it. Just summon it within yourself. No one can say that you don't have it if you believe that you possess it.

Flawed as it may be, there are times when it is really useful. Like now. I balled my fist, inhaled deeply, and when I was just inches away from the door, I heard murmurs and commotion inside. I examined the door, looking for some kind of knob, but I found none. It was a flat surface and has a fingerprint scanner on the side. Thankfully, it was not closed properly, and I smiled when I noticed that the door was ajar. I pushed it carefully anticipating that creaky sound, but to my amazement, there was none. Phew, another challenge completed.

My right foot stepped inside gingerly, my hands gripping the side of the door, half of my body slipping inside, and I saw Stefan landing a punch on Bryce... a loud crack of something breaking-- which was his jawbone-- made me wince. That's a hard punch.

Bryce lifted his head and our eyes met, shock and anger subtly flashed in his eyes, making me step backward as my hands shook and my breathing got heavier, as he mumbled and grumbled...blood dripping from his mouth. I noticed the hint of a smirk on his bloody lips that made me clench my jaw. He did it again. He inflicted fear on me again.

I closed my eyes and evened my breathing, did my breathing exercises, and opened my eyes again. Look at him carefully, Ollie. He is weak. He is just human. He can't hurt you anymore. Stef will protect you.

I can only see Stefan's wide back, but I can feel his rage and fury... the tension in the room was so dense and strong... I feel it seeping into my pores, goosebumps on my skin. I burned the image to my mind-- every blow Stefan gave, every lash, every word being spat-- I need to remember everything. Because that is my responsibility as his partner. I can't rely on Stefan to just carry my own share of troubles. I should also be able to help him chase his demons, or at the very best-- keep them at bay.

Both Trevor and Devon mirrored an expression of horror, confusion, and panic when they saw me. I signaled them to stay where they are and shook my head, then slowly closed the door.

I ran straight to our room and sat on the bed, took off my loafers, and went to the closet for a change of clothes, settling with a paired pajama. With a deep sigh, I flopped onto the bed. I calmed myself down and reflected on what just happened.

Was I surprised? Yes. Was what Stefan did brutal? Yes, but Bryce had it coming for him. We should always consider the consequences of our actions. Did Stefan scare me? The answer is... no.

I mean, the normal reaction after seeing that much violence was to run away and never look back. I don't even understand myself. I have been on the receiving end of violence and verbal abuse, so my initial reaction should be to get out of the situation that can make me feel unsafe.

But why don't I feel any fear for Stefan?

The resounding answer is trust. I trust him to care for me and protect me. I know that he will not hurt me. I feel secure with him. He is my haven and he never did anything to betray that trust and confidence.

The door opened and Stefan came in, with ragged breath and sweat pooling on his forehead, his shirt gone and droplets of blood splattered on his body. When he landed his eyes on me, he froze and blanched, and I saw how several emotions crossed his eyes.

I took a deep breath and stood up. I put on a blank expression and walked toward him. Let us test the foundation of this trust. Am I just being ruled by my naivete or does my trust and love for him trump it all?