i wake up on an empty couch, in an empty apartment. i glance at the clock on the wall and it is 1 in the morning. time flew by, the last time i looked at the clock, it was 6 pm and spencer and i were sitting down for dinner.

we spent the day cleaning up my apartment and watching multiple episodes of Doctor Who, before making dinner and then afterwards, watching a movie. i must've fallen asleep, and he must've gone home.

i sigh and get up and head towards the kitchen, to clean up and wash the remaining plates and dishes from dinner. just as i'm setting the last plate in the dishwasher, my phone buzzes.

i throw my head back and let out a groan. i head to my room to pick out something nicer to wear. i cant walk into work wearing flannel shorts and an oversized white tee. i pick out a long sleeve black dress that flows, and pair it with nude sandals. i'm not traveling, but i can work from the office, so i don't bother to pack a go bag.

i move quickly to my car and set off towards quantico. hotch seemed very urgent in his message, i have a feeling that this is going to be a bad one. i feel like we never get a break.

-

"HOLD THE ELEVATOR!" i yell while speedwalking towards the elevator that is shutting. i see a big hand reach out and grab the door, and it is morgan. i keep reminding myself that this is only going to be awkward if i make it awkward.

"hey, how was your few hours off?" i ask, while entering.

"pretty boring. i left here yesterday at 6 and now i'm back at 2 in the morning. i had just fallen asleep when i got the call." he answers. i look up at him and see the dark bags under his eyes, and his body language shows tiredness. he hasn't gotten a break in so long.

"derek, you look tired, like really tired. maybe you should take a case off, and let your body rest." i say, softly.

"don't profile me, stella." he says sternly, causing me to tense up, and turn away from him. i do not enjoy being scolded at. i'm a sensitive person to an extent. so i just leave him be on a now very awkward elevator ride.

i don't even have time to stop at my desk. i am immediately signaled to come to the conference room by garcia, who is waving me and morgan in with urgency.

i take my normal seat at the table, next to emily and spencer. about halfway through garcia's speech, i zone out. my mind begins to wander to the events that have happened over the last few days. the kidnapping, the hospital, morgan's apartment, kissing spencer. its weird that this all happened within a week.

soon, i am being tapped on the shoulder. i get knocked out of my zone and see that everyone had gotten up and walked out, except for derek and spencer.

"sorry, i, uh, zoned out." i whisper embarrassingly, grabbing my file, and go to walk out of the room, but am pulled back by spencer.

"are you having nightmares?" spencer asks. i look over at derek and he's shaking his head as he leaves the room. i roll my eyes. "yes, i've been having nightmares. what, did derek tell you?" i answer, making the annoyance in my tone obvious.

"yeah, he said you woke up screaming in the middle of the night. stella why didn't you tell me?" spencer mutters, shooting me a glare.

"i didn't think it was relevant. plus, we were having such a good time yesterday and i didn't want to ruin it." i answer softly, looking at my feet.

"stella, you can always tell me anything. it is better to talk about these things. have you looked into a therapist?" he asks me, lifting up my chin and looking me in the eyes.

"not yet. i was planning on looking into one while you guys were gone. i mean, i'm probably just going to be doing paper work and hanging out with garcia, there's not much i can do." i mumble. "i'm going to miss you." i add on, and spencer pulls me into a hug.

i wrap my arms around his torso and bury my head into his chest. "i'll miss you too. i'll be back before you know it." he whispers. i pull away from the hug and let him leave for the airport.

i sigh as i grab my purse from the floor and head to my desk. i don't see why it's okay for spencer to go and not me. i wish i could go. i feel useless here.

just as i reach my desk, garcia runs up to me. "stella, are you and reid a thing?" she asks eagerly.

i shake my head. "not really. we are just really close. i uh, actually met him the night before my first day." i say while scratching the back of my neck. "we hooked up. i was never supposed to see him again, and here we are." i add on with a chuckle.

garcia's jaw drops. "y-you and reid... did it?" she asks excitingly.

"yes, we did. but we haven't since then. we promised to stay close friends." i mutter, and she gives me a look.

"you two are perfect for each other. your chemistry is great! don't act like i didn't see you too hugging in there." she says with a smirk, and then trots off to her lair, as she likes to call it.

i roll my eyes at her back with a smile and sit down, beginning to work on the many, many files i have to do.

A/N: this chapter really sucks, i promise they'll get better. also, TYSM for 300 reads!!