Luke, Lorelai, Rory and Charlotte were sat in Miss Patty's listening to Taylor going on about how there were too many birds landing on the street lights and relieving themselves on people.

"You get dumped on, Taylor?" Babette shouted out.

"It's not just me..." Taylor said.

"Hey, if anybody has a picture of Taylor getting dumped on, I'll pay top dollar." Luke said.

"I'll check the internet." Charlotte grinned.

"Taylor, all animals have to...you know. How are you going to stop birds from doing that?" Miss Patty asked.

"Easy. Put sharp metal spikes on the top of the fixtures, then when they land, pow, they're shish-kebabs!" Taylor said.

"That's cruel!" Rory called out.

"You can't do that." Babette said.

"I'd rather have bird crap fall on my head." Andrew nodded agreeing.

"There it is, our new town slogan." Lorelai joked.

"I like it." Rory grinned.

"I see coffee mugs, t-shirts..." Lorelai said.

"Don't forget stuffed shish-kebabbed birds!" Charlotte grinned.

"That moan when you squeeze them..." Lorelai started to say but was interrupted by a man coming through the large sliding door.

"Excuse me." He said.

"May I help you, sir?" Taylor asked.

"Yes, I was looking for..." He said. "Ah, there she is...Patricia." He smiled.

"Patricia...well, well, well!" Lorelai teased and everyone laughed.

"Oh stop it!" Miss Patty smirked.

"Are you ready?" The man asked.

"I'm right in the middle of something, Jésus, but I'll be right out. Patience." She said.

"Ok." He said walking out.

"Now, as we were saying..." Taylor said.

"Who's the fox, Patty?" Babette asked.

"Excuse me!" Taylor exclaimed.

"I met him at a funeral. Great guy, good dancer, Latin..." Miss Patty smiled getting another 'oooh' from everyone.

"People, order please!" Taylor exclaimed frustrated.

"He better treat you right, this guy." Lorelai said.

"Yeah, how well do you know him?" Babette asked.

"Well, I just met him."

"I could look him up on the internet." Kirk suggested.

"Along with photos of Taylor getting dumped on!" Charlotte grinned.

"People, please!" Taylor shouted. "Now, due to the lack of response, we'll hold off on the bird spikes." He said reluctantly.

"Good." Luke said.

"Let Miss Patty's date begin!" Lorelai grinned causing everyone to start getting up.

"Hold it. There's one more issue that must be addressed before we can adjourn. All right. Now, that weird, taciturn fellow who's always walking around with his backpack has put in an absurd request to stage a protest in the town square." Taylor said.

"The town loner?" Lorelai asked.

"That guy still lives around here?" Luke said.

"Somewhere in the hills, right?" Babette said.

"I thought he was long gone." Luke said.

"No, he came into the bookstore a couple times last month, never said a word." Andrew commented.

"He's a bit creepy." Miss Patty said.

"Very creepy!" Taylor nodded.

"But he's our Boo Radley and we don't have a Boo Radley! Unless you count the troubadour or Pete the pizza guy or the guy who talks to mailboxes." Lorelai exclaimed.

"We definitely do need a Boo Radley!" Charlotte nodded.

"I think the point is that every town needs as many Boo Radleys as they can get." Rory said.

"Yes, that's my point!" Lorelai nodded.

"What's he protesting, Taylor?" Miss Patty asked.

"Well, that's not indicated here but it doesn't matter because protesting is not allowed in the town square, period. It's un-American." Taylor said.

"What's the harm in him protesting? His protests are always peaceful anyway." Charlotte said.

"I agree." Lorelai said.

"Well I disagree and as Town Selectman, I am refusing the town loner's request to protest and I am adjourning this meeting." He said banging his gavel.

"She's all yours, Jésus!" Lorelai called out.

"We got nothing of substance done in this meeting." Luke commented getting up with Lorelai, Charlotte and Rory.

"And the tradition stands." Lorelai joked.

"Yeah that's the fun of these meetings!" Charlotte grinned.

The four of them walked out together.

"Hey, what do you know about this town loner guy?" Lorelai asked Luke.

"Same as everyone. Just kind of skulks around with that backpack, never smiles." Luke said.

"Does he also make cheeseburgers and secretly harbour a desire to wear a backwards baseball cap?" Lorelai teased.

"What?" Luke said.

"Do you have a cousin? One who likes to protest?" She teased.

"Stop it." Luke rolled his eyes.

Just then Jess drove by in a car.

"Oh I didn't know Jess got a car." Lorelai said, looking at Charlotte.

"Don't look at me." Charlotte said. "He didn't say anything to me." She said watching Jess disappear out of sight. "I'm going to head home." She said.

"Yeah I need to study. I'll go with Charlotte." Rory said.

"Ok, I'll catch up with you." Lorelai said.

Rory walked off with Charlotte. She glanced across at her. "Are you ok?" She asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Charlotte asked.

"You just don't seem ok. Does it bother you Jess having a car?" Rory asked.

"Not really."

"That sounds convincing." Rory said.

Charlotte sighed. "Look, I know what happened to my car was an accident. It wasn't Jess' fault. But it would have been nice for him to tell me he was getting a car." She said.

Rory just nodded.

"I'm going to go for a walk." Charlotte said. "I'll meet you at home."

"Ok." Rory said watching her sister walk off.

******************************

Luke found Jess round the corner, getting out of the car. "Hey." He said.

"Hey." Jess said.

"So...you got a car." Luke said.

"Well observed." Jess said. "I know it's not much but it'll get me from point A to point B."

"Yeah, I guess it'll get you around." Luke said. "So...uh...where did you get the money for it?" He asked.

"Mugged an old lady." Jess said sarcastically.

"Jess..."

"It didn't cost that much."

"What's not much?" Luke asked.

"Less than a lot?"

"Jess, where did you get the money?" Luke sighed.

"You know that hash you sling at the diner? I scrape it off the plates in the back. Remember I work for you?" Jess said.

"Yeah, I know you do." Luke said.

"Ok, then."

"I also know I don't pay you enough to buy the car."

"I saved up my pennies and I bought the car from Gypsy. She gave me a good deal. That's how I got the car." Jess said.

"Ok, so you bought a car. Now, the price of the car is just one small thing. It's just the beginning." Luke said.

"Oh yeah?"

"Did you take the additional expenses into account?"

"Like...?" Jess said.

"Insurance?"

"I'm in good hands."

"Liability, uninsured motorist?"

"All the paperwork's in the glove compartment. Feel free to check it out." Jess said.

"Money for gas?"

"You mean this didn't come with a never empty magical tank?"

"Jess..." Luke said.

"I factored that in."

"You're going to have repairs." Luke pointed out.

"Yeah, and I can fix most of them myself and save up for the rest. Plus, I'm going to make sure to replace the oil every couple of months." He said.

"Right, I bet you didn't think of that, the oil. That costs money." Luke said.

"I'm the one that brought it up. You're the one that didn't think of it." Jess said.

"No, but...I just..." Luke sighed giving up.

"Sign this." Jess said handing him a piece of paper.

"The registration?" Luke asked.

"I'm still a minor." Jess said.

"I don't have a pen." Luke said.

"Here." Jess said holding out a pen. He was surprised when Luke actually took it and signed the paper.

"I guess it's ok that someone else's name is crossed out on it and that yours it written in." Luke said dryly.

"Yup." Jess said.

"Just checking." He said handing it back.

"Thanks. I'm glad we had this talk." Jess smirked.

"Yeah, same here." Luke said shaking his head and walking off.

Jess then spotted Charlotte walking towards him. "Hey." He said.

"Hey." She said. "So you got a car..."

"A lot of good observations tonight." Jess smirked.

"Why didn't you tell me you were getting a car?" Charlotte asked.

"It was a spur of the moment thing." Jess said.

"Oh." Charlotte said, looking at the car.

"Are you ok?" Jess asked.

"Who me? Yeah I'm fine." Charlotte forced a smile on her face.

"Ok..." Jess said not pushing her.

"I should get home." She said.

"Call you later?" He asked.

"Sure." She said giving him a small smile before walking off, leaving Jess stood there confused.

*******************************

Charlotte was sat in the armchair with her sketchpad while Rory was studying on the couch as Lorelai walked through the front door with the mail.

"Hey! Mail call!" Lorelai smiled handing both of them a piece of mail.

"What's this?" Rory asked.

"Mortgage payment. You mind picking it up this month you two?" Lorelai joked.

"No, not at all." Rory said opening it along with Charlotte. "Oh. It's an invitation..." She said glancing over at Charlotte who was staring at it.

"Invitation for what?" Lorelai asked. "Oh, is it the White House again? Those boys never give up." She joked.

"It's to Sherry's baby shower." Rory cringed.

"Who?" Lorelai asked.

"Sherry. Sherry Tinsdale. Dad's Sherry?" Rory said.

"You're kidding." She said surprised, glancing over at Charlotte who hadn't said anything yet.

"It's at her and Dad's house on Sunday." Rory read out.

"Wow, that is very weird. We haven't had contact with Christopher in months. She must know we're on the outs with him, right?" Lorelai said.

"Unless he didn't tell her." Charlotte spoke for the first time.

"Yeah she might not know how on the outs we are." Rory said.

"Well, zero contact is maximum on the outs." Lorelai commented.

"Yeah...although there may have been some..." Rory cringed.

"Some what?" Lorelai asked.

"Some contact." Rory admitted.

"Oh..." Lorelai said. "You've been in contact with Christopher?"

"Yeah..." Rory admitted, glancing over at her sister who was just looking at her not saying anything. "I'm sorry..." She said.

"Oh no, hon, don't apologize." Lorelai said quickly. "You've always been totally free to talk to him whenever you want. I've told you that. I mean, he's your dad, right? So don't apologize." She said.

"Ok, I take the apology back." Rory said.

"I think it's good you've been talking to him. It is a little weird you didn't tell me, though." Lorelai said.

"Very weird." Charlotte commented.

"Sorry." Rory said.

Lorelai glanced between her daughters and realised they needed some time. "I'm going to go make some coffee. Any takers?" She said.

"Me please." Rory said.

"Sure." Charlotte said.

"Three coffees coming up." Lorelai said disappearing off to the kitchen.

Rory glanced over at her sister. "Are you mad?" She asked hesitantly.

"No." Charlotte said.

"Charlie..." Rory said.

Charlotte sighed. "I'm a bit surprised but mad? No, I have no right to be mad. He's your dad too. Just because I'm on the outs with him doesn't mean you have to be." She said.

"But..." Rory said.

"Ror, it's fine." Charlotte said.

"Really?" Rory asked relaxing a bit.

"Really." She said.

"I was mad at him. I really was." Rory said.

"I know." Charlotte nodded.

"But he's still..."

"Our dad. Yeah I know." Charlotte said. "It's fine. You shouldn't feel guilty."

"Ok." Rory said. She glanced at her sister. "Thanks." She said softly.

Charlotte smiled at her. "So are you going to go?" She asked.

"I don't know." Rory admitted. "It feels weird."

"Yeah..." Charlotte said.

"But this kid is going to be our half brother or sister whether we like it or not. It's not the kid's fault." Rory said. "And Sherry's been nothing but nice to us as well."

"True." Charlotte said. She sighed seeing her sister hesitate. "Look, if you want to go, I'll go with you." She said.

"Really?" Rory asked surprised.

"Like you said, it's not Sherry's fault. Or the kid's fault. And it's not like dad will be there so I wouldn't have to see him." Charlotte said.

"Are you sure?" Rory asked.

"Hey, what are sisters for?" Charlotte smiled.

Rory smiled. "Ok. So we're going?"

"Looks like it." Charlotte said.

"I'll drive you there if you want." Lorelai said coming back in.

"Really?" Rory asked surprised.

"Yeah, I'll do some Boston shopping while you quiche it." She joked.

"And we can set up some sort of SOS signal that we can page you with if we want to bail early?" Rory asked.

"Sure." Lorelai nodded.

"What should the SOS signal be?" Rory asked.

"How about SOS?" Charlotte smirked.

"Perfect!" Lorelai grinned.

******************************

Sunday soon came and Lorelai, Charlotte and Rory had headed off to Boston. Meanwhile, back at the diner, Luke walked up to the apartment with some containers of food. He found Jess already there. "Hey, I got dinner. Half an apple pie, too. Told the last couple people that wanted some that a fly landed in it." He said.

"Why are you going through my stuff?" Jess asked.

"Huh?" Luke said.

"Why are you going through all my stuff?" Jess repeated.

"I'm not." Luke said.

"So someone else is?"

"I'm not going through your stuff." He argued.

"You suck at lying." Jess said.

"You're paranoid." Luke said.

"Fine, I'm being paranoid but that doesn't mean you're not going through my stuff." Jess exclaimed annoyed.

"Get the forks." Luke said.

"Practically everything I own is in a slightly different place than when I saw it last. Now why are you going through my stuff?" Jess insisted.

"For your own good."

"My own good?"

"Hey, how about I ask a question, Jess?" Luke said.

"If it has to do with this, be my guest."

"Where did you get the money for the car?"

"What?"

"The car. Where did you get the money?" Luke repeated.

"I told you, I worked for it." Jess said.

"I know what I pay you."

"Ok, well I do jobs around town." Jess admitted.

"What jobs?"

"I clean rain gutters."

"Jess, if you cleaned every rain gutter from here to Vermont, you wouldn't have enough money to buy that car. Now tell me where you got the money."

"I'm not just doing rain gutters when I'm not working at the diner."

"What are you doing?"

"I go to a...a place that gives me money." Jess said.

"For what?" Luke asked confused.

"For my services."

"What services? What place?" Luke asked. He then paused. "Oh my god, Jess, are you a gigolo?" He asked. "How could you do that to Charlotte? Does she even know?"

"What? Ok you're crazy!" Jess exclaimed.

"Well, I don't know. You say you go to a place where they give you money..." Luke exclaimed.

"I do."

"Where?" Luke exclaimed.

"Wal-Mart!" Jess finally admitted.

"Wait, what?" Luke said surprised.

"I've been working there twelve hours a week for the past few months to get extra money for the car." Jess said.

"Wal-Mart?"

"Yeah."

"You work at Wal-Mart?" Luke asked.

"Yeah."

"I can't picture you working at Wal-Mart." Luke said.

Jess pulled a name tag out of his pocket and showed it to Luke.

"Oh my god, you work at Wal-Mart." Luke laughed.

"Let's drop this now." Jess said.

"Yeah, sure, fine." Luke said as they went over to the table to eat. "You're not the guy that greets people at the door, are you?" He asked amused.

"We were dropping this." Jess groaned.

"Come on!"

"I work in the back. I move stock around on a forklift."

"That takes a special license, doesn't it?" Luke asked.

"I spent a Saturday afternoon taking the class and I got it like that, no biggie." Jess said.

"Wow. Does Charlotte know?"

"No and she's not going to. We done here?" Jess asked.

"Yeah." Luke said. "You wear a vest and everything?" He smirked.

"It's the uniform, I have to."

"You've been sneaking out of here with a little vest hidden on you?" Luke asked amused.

"It's not a little vest."

"Is it blue?"

"Will you stop talking about the vest?"

"Do you get a store discount?" Luke teased.

"Fifteen percent. And if you want fifteen percent off anything, you're not going to get it because you're being a jerk." Jess commented.

"My enjoyment is worth the loss." Luke grinned.

"I'm eating and ignoring you."

"Ah, you're like the all-American boy."

"Call me Dirk Squarejaw." Jess said dryly.

"Look at you." Luke teased.

"What?"

"Eating apple pie." He smirked.

"I'm out of here." Jess groaned.

"Hey, wave a flag and sing "God Bless America", please?" Luke chuckled.

"Goodbye." Jess said before leaving the apartment.

******************************

Lorelai, Charlotte and Rory were driving home from the shower that evening in silence. It had been a surreal day, one that included Sherry insisting that Lorelai join them.

"You're okay to drive, right?" Rory asked.

"I barely drank a thing." Lorelai said.

"I'm talking about your mood." Rory said.

"My mood is fine." Lorelai sighed.

"You're still mad at Sherry." Rory commented.

"No, I'm fine, and I'm fine to drive. Although sometimes, when I'm driving and it's dark like this, I get the sudden urge to turn the wheel into oncoming traffic." She commented.

"No, do not do Duane from Annie Hall!" Charlotte said.

"I can see the flames, I can smell the smoke..." Lorelai said.

"I hate this bit." Rory said.

"Ok, I'm creeping me out, too. Move those things, will you? They're not the most fragrant food in the world." Lorelai said screwing up her nose.

Rory moved the container away from her. "We shouldn't have taken them." She said.

"We had no choice." Charlotte said from the back.

"She was insistent." Rory agreed.

"Take the deviled eggs! How many times did the woman say it? And then her drunken friends hear it and they're all shouting it!" Lorelai exclaimed.

"They were all drunk." Rory said.

"Maureen and Susan almost coming to blows was worth it, though. How did that happen, anyway?" Lorelai asked.

"From what I can tell, Susan said, "Bla ra um beh bleh," and Maureen took great offence." Charlotte smirked.

"Well, yeah." Lorelai smirked.

"You know, we didn't have to stay that long." Rory said.

"Not according to Sherry. She made a very persuasive argument that if we left at six, there would be an extra hour of sitting in traffic, so by leaving at seven we would get home at the same time as leaving at six." Lorelai said.

"She's very up on traffic flow and rush hour and all that." Charlotte nodded.

"She should do traffic reports on the radio." Rory joked. "At least you're joking now. You're feeling better."