You know that "oh shit" feeling you get when you hear crazy news about someone. That rush of relatability you get when you sympathize with that individual for their poor luck; that feeling when you put yourself in their shoes and try and understand what they might be thinking and feeling.

I wish I knew what someone on the outside looking in on my situation was thinking right now, because I can guarantee that it isn't at all what I'm feeling now. They probably think that I'm hurt, in pain, or simply sobbing in self-pity. They'd be wrong.

I was enraged and numb all at once.

I was stuck in the spot I stood still processing the straight forward meaning of the words Osiris told me.

We were mates.

That explained all the tingles and my none stop wandering mind whenever it conjured up the image of him. I had made myself feel guilty for ever thinking of him fondly and now it all made sense though now when I look at him all I think about is the fact that he never wanted me. Not in the true sense, if he had he'd have admitted we were mates from the beginning.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised though, an alpha would never openly except a weak, mutated wolf like me. You couldn't even call me a wolf, I was a cursed human.

"Phina, I'm sorry." I heard Osiris apologize. His apology fell on deaf ears.

I took a step back needing space between us. The entrance way to the cabin though spacious, suddenly felt claustrophobic. My heart was pounding a hundred miles a minute, my breathing was so quick I barely had enough time to exhale before I was forcing oxygen back into my starving lungs.

"You didn't want me..." I breathed out biting a piece of skin from my lip. "-did you?"

I didn't want to face Osiris but I willed myself to hold his remorseful gaze. Sure, he felt sorry now, he even said sorry but did he really mean it or was it all a plan to get me to stay.

"Can we talk about this privately, Phina?"

"No, answer my question."

There was dead silence for a few moments before Desmond nervously rubbed the back of his head. "If it helps at all, I'll just head to bed and-"

"No." I screamed at Desmond slamming my fist on the table. The wood cracked under the force of my fist. "You're going to stand here and listen to this whole thing. You were a part of this too."

"But I didn't want to be apart of it." He stressed. "He made me do it."

Desmond pointed his finger at his brother. He stood so closely to him that he could physically poke the side of Osiris's face. Osiris was so focused on the crack of the wood that he didn't seem bothered by his brothers intrusive finger. So annoyance bubbled up and Osiris swatted his hand away with a growl, his eyes still fixated where my fist made contact with the table.

"I don't care who did what, you had so much time to come clean and you didn't. If what Osiris said was true then that means that you willingly lied to the Luna of your pack. What does that make you?"

He rubbed his throat that was sweating, a hint of a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "That makes me a loyal beta to the alpha. I was following orders."

"That doesn't make you loyal that makes you coward. You'd rather follow the orders of an alpha out of fear then tell the true to a luna and be honest."

The smile that once tugged at the corners of his mouth evaporated instantly. Not so funny now. is it?

"You're all sick in the head." I looked a Osiris. "You, Desmond, even Ivy; you're all sick in the fucking head. You all just played along and knew the truth. How can you sleep at night? How can you look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself your a good person?"

Tears broke free cascading down my red cheeks. I had fought off the need to cry long enough, crying was what I needed at this moment.

Never had I ever felt this magnitude of vulnerability until now. All the years of bullying and degrading comments I had never felt more vulnerable than I did in that moment. The amount of hurt I felt in that moment nearly left me incapacitated.

Endless waterfalls of tears trickled down my face as I felt the growing panic gear my legs into motion. I had to get away, I had to get out of this room, I had to get away from him.

Clamorous feet barreled to the stairs. Osiris reached out with pleading hands trying to stop me from escaping. My hand flew out smacking his hands away before they could tear me away. Desmond happily moved to the side making no attempt to halt my pursuit.

I ascending the stairs skipping every other stair as I made my way to the second floor. Osiris was hot on my heels and in an attempt to get rid of him I swirled around on the steps. He was only a mere six or so inches from me and with one big shove to his chest he stumbled backwards down the stairs.

My heart fell for a moment regretting my childish tantrum. Hurting him wasn't going to do anything for me, it wasn't going to change anything, it actually only made the heartbreak worse. Mates weren't supposed to harm each other it was all supposed to be love and admiration.

What was I do? What were we doing?

Osiris caught himself mid tumble by grabbing onto the railing. His face was stunned, the sheer shock of my actions still processing in his head. His eyes began to morph into black abysses as I took one last second to gaze down at him.

In my eyes he was a manipulative alpha, he might not be a monster like Philip but he sure isn't much different than every other authoritative alpha.

"Phina, please let me explain." Osiris begged pulling himself up onto his feet.

He rushed up the stairs with inhuman speed. Thankful for my bedroom only being around the corner, I practically threw myself inside, slamming and locking the door behind.

My chest rose and fell rapidly trying to quench the thirst for air my deprived lungs screamed for. The door knob jiggled as someone on the other side attempted to let themselves in.

"Phina, please."

I bit down on my lip with a harsh pressure drawing out blood. I needed something to distract me.

"Is everything okay?"

I screamed at the voice, it was coming from my bedroom. Andy threw his hands up in surrender startled, no doubt, from my sudden intrusion.

Unbeknownst, Osiris took my scream for some sort of threat as he tried mercilessly to tear down the door. My body bounced against the thick door of the bedroom door, that was how hard Osiris pounded against the wood. It would splinter at this rate if he didn't stop.

"What are you doing in here Andy?" I panted.

Another set of growls and a couple threats to break down the door by Osiris had Andy up on his feet.

"I, I was waiting to hangout with you."

"Who's that? Are you hurt? Phina, open the door."

The hinges of the door squeaked as Osiris slammed his body against the door. Two hinges broke free from the wall flying across the room with a clamor. It was only me and the single top hinge of the door fighting for its life to hold the door in place.

How I was able to fight off Osiris this long left me speechless.

"Now isn't the best time Andy."

The assault on the door abruptly stopped and I could vaguely make out the voice of Desmond. His tone of voice was reprimanding and though I wanted to listen to how he scolded his brother I was unable to over my ridged breathing.

Andy narrowed his eyes. "Something happened. What happened Sera?"

Concern filled his face as he tried to figure out on his own what was going on. The heated argument that was ensuing behind the door left only terrible images to develop in Andy's mind. I could only imagine what he thought had happened.

There was a furious alpha on the opposite side of the door and a tear stricken friend holding the it in place. I don't even know what I would think if I were in his shoes.

"Nothing, Andy."

A ferocious growl vibrated through the door and Andy cocked his head to the side. "That doesn't sound like nothing Sera."

"Seraphina open the door and let me explain myself. There was a reason I didn't tell you sooner." Osiris begged his tone desperate.

"Leave me alone Osiris." I yelled.

"No. Open the door damn door."

"Don't talk to her like that." Andy snapped.

My eyes near fell out of my head. What the hell was Andy doing correcting an alpha? He was human.

"Are you crazy? Do you have a death wish or something?"

Andy walked closer until he stopped just shy of where I stood pressed against he door.

"No, Sera. He shouldn't being talking to you like that. You didn't leave one awful alpha just to be disrespected by another."

Before I knew it I was pushed to the side and the bedroom door fell free. I had been the only thing holding it in place.

Osiris rushed in, only a blur in front of my eyes as he stood in the middle of the room. Andy had once been standing next to me but he was now hoisted in the air by the collar of his shirt by Osiris. I wished Andy had more sense but as I watched him now he only glared daggers at my mate.

"Don't talk to her like that." Andy panted digging his nails into Osiris's forearm. Osiris only tightened his grip.

I was terrified of what Osiris might do if Andy continued to egg him on. I couldn't let my mate murder my best friend.

I took a few steps to run over and break them apart only to be held back. Desmond had made his way inside the room too, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling my back.

"Let me go Desmond."

He squeezed tighter making me take a sharp breath in. I stilled. "No, he has to do this." He whispered into my ear.

"I wouldn't say another word if I were you if you want to still have my approval to stay." Osiris snarled his eyes beaming fireballs of amber.

"I'm not going to sit here and eat you yell at her like that. You're no better than alpha Philip treating her like that. And you call yourself the alpha slayer. Someone who removes men like you from power."

Osiris sneered finding Andy's fighting words a mockery. Of course he would take it as a joke.

He turned around in the time it took to blink, slamming Andy's back against the wall. There was a loud thud as Andy's head knocked against the wall.

Andy's eyes rolled back for a moment before he blinked and straightened them out.

"Stop. You're going to kill him." I screamed, scratching at Desmond's arms hopelessly trying to break free. When Desmond didn't let go I dug my nails as deep as I could go into his forearms. He let go instantly.

I quickly as I could I ran across the room. Everything felt as though it were going in slow motion. My legs had a mind of their own as they maneuvered me around with agility I had always aspired to have.

I slid across the hardwood floor bending down as I neared Osiris and Andy. I grabbed onto Osiris's arm as I ducked under the first arm standing up once I was between his husky arms.

He couldn't see Andy's face now, mine had replaced his. His nostrils flared as growing irritation brightened the irises of his eyes. Mine flared too but for another reason, the intoxicating smell that drove me have crazy hit me stronger. It was like I only smelt a hint this entire time. Now, it felt different, smelt different, it was virtually entrancing.

I had to blink my eyes together a few time to regain my composure. My focus might have been back but I couldn't help but be half mindful of the growing ache between my legs. What ever that smell was had turned me on.

I didn't know if I wanted to be disgusted, or allured by the reaction. It wasn't a bad thing necessarily if I was the only one who knows.

"Get out of the way Phina." His voice was low and level though it only came with much restraint.

"No." I placed my hands on his arms. They were still stretched out pinning Andy in place.

"Phina... move-"

"No, you aren't thinking straight. Let him go."

"I'll let him go if you let me explain."

"No, Osiris I don't want to hear anything from you, not right now anyways."

Andy strained against his hold as he took in a shaky breath. He was getting exhausted.

"We can talk, we can talk." I stammered grabbing harder onto his bicep. He released his hold and Andy fell onto the floor. "Get out of here Andy. I'll come see you later."

Andy hesitated taking a step forward. I quickly threw my hand up.

"No, Andy. Go, now. I'm okay, I promise."

He glanced at Osiris then back at me before reluctantly turning around and leaving. Desmond nodded his head at us both before picking up the door the fell and sticking it haphazardly into the door frame.

It left much of the door way open so I wasn't doing much for privacy, but I guess it's the thought that matters.

I waited until I couldn't hear anyone anymore. Once I was certain no one was near I whirled around throwing a punch directly into Osiris's chest.

He was thrown off balance as he teetered over onto my bed.

"Fuck."

"Fucking explain."