It's getting too close to home. Alphas we're getting too bold. They were crossing lines not meant to be crossed.

I thought I knew what rage was but I had been wrong. Nothing in my life time had ever made me feel like violence was the unquestionable answer to me problems. It didn't even take Aspen saying her name completely before my other half just about lost all control.

He did loss control... I had struggled to control him, that beast side of me.

It wasn't bad enough that he was already sensitive and overwhelmed by her. She didn't take the news of us being mates well. I didn't think it'd be a walk in the park and I prepared myself for her disappointment but it never crossed my mind that she'd be infuriated.

Insulted.

Phina was always so quiet and calm when it came to most people. She allowed Ivy to drag her along to do just about anything. She'd let Desmond take her places without any push or shove back; there was no hesitation or second thought.

Yet, when it came to me I got reprimanded for everything that I said or didn't say. Nothing was ever good enough. Somehow I was able to piss her off with ease even when I wasn't trying to.

But could I blame her.

My wolf continues day in and day out bombarding me with hatful speech. He was fed up with my behavior. He wanted me to beg on my hands and knees for her to forgive me and move on.

As if it were that easy.

Phina was sweet but she wasn't afraid to tell me off. She really wasn't afraid to tell anyone when they were morally wrong. Correcting poor values and morals came natural to her; something I routinely overlooked.

"People are being killed because of me? I- I got people killed. This proves to me all the more reason to leave."

Her words stung me back to reality. Phina tugged at her hair as she squeezed her eyes in despair. That made two of us because my throat felt as though it was closing in on itself. She was leaving? She was planning on leaving? Had I screwed up so bad as to scare her away?

I grimaced at the perfectly logical possibility.

I couldn't blame her.

"Leave?" I breathed. "You want to leave?"

Phina paused letting go over her hair. Her hand dropped slowly down to her sides as she eyed me with annoyance.

"That's what you took from that?"

Her irritated voice sounded in my head. All I could do was blink as I processed what I had done wrong this time.

"No one is dying because of you, there's more to this than you know. But that's not what I want to take about right now." I took a step toward her, when she didn't retreat I took that as a good sign to take another greedy step closer. "Why do you want to leave?"

"You can't tell me this all has nothing to do with me. You can't honestly think I'd believe that. I don't even know why I'm listening to you anyways. You'll spit out more lies." She retorted.

I watched her closely as she bit at her bottom lip breaking off a loose bit of skin. Her eyes were scowling but her eyes deceived her because hidden beneath the hard exterior she was terrified.

"I'm not lying." I tried to reassure her. She shook her head in denial.

I was taking a gamble when I reach out and grabbed her arm pulling her closer. Phina pulled back to free herself but it didn't matter, I wasn't letting go, not until she listened to me.

"Let go of me."

"No. You've been running away from me since I told you we were mates."

She tugged her arm back with a grunt. Her curls broke free from her hair tie and in an explosion of messy golden curls Phina peered up at me through the strands.

If looks could kill I would be dead.

Phina tugged again with a string of curses. My patience was dwindling not to mention the growing ache she planted in my chest with ever repulsive look.

"Let me go." She screamed. She nearly threw herself on the ground before I pulled her back toward me.

I lowered my height to level with her's and with all the restraint I had and cold tone I asked her. "Are you done?"

Dark eyes stared at me as though I were the most despicable thing they've seen.

"Are you?" Phina seethed her tone matching my own.

The terror behind her eyes vanished as her attention fixated on me and all other emotions but anger vanished. Not the effect I was hoping for but I'll take what I can get. She was at least focused now.

Brushing off her attitude I pulled away. "You want me to let you go? I let you go."

She stared blankly at me before looking the direction Aspen and Desmond left.

"You're free to go back." I said walking away. I didn't want to stand around and watch her leave again. I didn't think I'd be able to handle it again.

My wolf clawed at the inside of my body as I continued walking away. I didn't look back as I gradually moved further away from her only ducking behind a familiar tree that I knew had a clothing chest near it.

I strained my ears to listen for her with relief when all I could hear was her heartbeat and a few soft birds chirping above. She didn't leave. A small ball of warmth formed in my chest as I told myself she'd rather stay than leave. It probably wasn't the case but I wouldn't allow myself to think anything else.

Peeping around the tree I watched to see what she was doing. Her golden hair gleamed in the rays of the sun making her look like a fiery goddess; a Phenix, in my eyes. Her rose cheeks looked like an effort less blush and her honey-like eyes flickered from where Aspen and Desmond once were and back to the generally area that I walked away in.

I could hear her racing heart beat faster and faster with every passing second. She was panicking all over again. My wolf begged me to vear around the tree and reveal myself but I was too curious.

I wanted to see what direction she was going to take.

After what felt like an eternity she made up her mind. She was heading in my direction.

Wide-eyed and surprised I moved quickly to pull on the sweatpants from the chest. I didn't mind being naked but I didn't think that Phina would agree. It didn't matter though because she choose me and that was all that I could think about. Even though she's said she wants to leave and not be around me, she picked me over heading back home.

I haphazardly tugged on one leg of the pants and rushing to pull on the other, lost in the million thoughts inside my head I had become clumsy. My foot had caught the band of the sweatpants and I lost my balance. I fell forward smacking my face against the icy snow with a loud grunt.

"Shit." I hissed pushing myself back up.

A giggle reached my ears and with dumbstruck eyes I nervously gazed up. Golden honey orbs looked down at me with amusement and concern. Phina snorted as I yanked up the last bit of my sweatpants.

"Do you usually fall over when you put on pants?" She snickered.

I wanted to be mad. I wanted to be irritated she found me in such a vulnerable position. All I could feel was embarrassment.

She had just caught me with my pants down around my ankles, my face deep in the snow, and ass high in the air. I was an alpha and here I was looking like frat bro that had one to many drinks, got pants, and fell.

Wiping the snow from my face I watched my little mate intently. For just a brief moment she had smiled at me, something she rarely did. I couldn't blame her though.

"No." I replied tying the strings of my pants. I was not about to embarrass the shit out of myself again. I'd rather bury myself alive. "I was rushing, trying to cover myself up."

"But I thought werewolves didn't care about being... nude."

"I don't care but I thought you might. I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

Phina's smile disappeared and was replaced by confusion. "Oh, well thank you, I guess?"

She innocently looked over her shoulder bringing her attention back to me. Her bottom lip was red with irritation where she'd pulled more skin off than she meant. I'm starting to realize she inflicts pain on herself when she's overly anxious. It was a poor choice for a distraction.

"I don't know my way back. Can you show me how to get back to the cabin?" My earlier excitement vanished. Slowly my limbs felt as though they were turning to ice as my heart dropped.

So she didn't really want to stick around. The thought of her rather being away from me than with me left me nauseated.

Chocking back the whirlpool of emotions I mustered up the courage to speak. "Sure, it's this way." I told her stepping around her making sure to leave as much space as I could between us in passing. I didn't need to make matters worse.

We walked in silence as I led us back home. Well it wasn't her home in her eyes but damn it I wished she'd see it that way.

I had to figure out a way to make amends. I had to work out a way to convince her to stay; to not hate me and forgive me. Having her forgive me with damn near impossible not with how repulsed she was with me mere presence; but I had made her laugh. That had to count for something... right?

Oh, who was I kidding she'd hate me 'til the day I die.

"Osiris."

Her soft innocent voice captured my attention in a second. My body stiffened in place while my breath hitched in my throat.

Should I turn around to face her? Or would that spook her? Should I answer? Did she really want me to acknowledge her?

I thought all this time she'd rather me act as though I were invisible, but here she was calling my attention. Fuck if it didn't feel good. The once icy feeling she had me brewing in my gut vanished with my name falling from her lips.

Gulping a nervous lump I gazed over my shoulder to look at her. She had pulled her hair up again after the wild mess it was, loose curls fell around her freckled face perfect and effortlessly.

She was beautiful in ever way, I just wished she'd give me a chance to be the mate I should have been from the start.

"Yes?"

Her eyes widened slightly by my voice before they relaxed. She licked her lips nervously as she glanced around the woods.

"This is a bit random but... aren't you going to get frostbite walking on the snow this long?"

Baffled now I turned to face her fully. Talk about the most random question to ask. Then the possibility dawned on me. Was this Phina's way of making small talk? It was so odd and contradictory, it was everything Phina didn't want to do.

"Sorry, f-forget I even said anything." She blurted out rubbing her shoulders with a shiver. Phina had been walking behind me the entire time but now she's moved herself ahead of me, her cheeks red from embarrassment.

Catching her arm before she fully walked ahead of me I knew I had to take advantage of this moment I just hoped I didn't fuck it up.

"No, no wait Phina." Pursing my lips I looked down at her. I had been having trouble piecing together what to say that I was blind to the fact I looked like I didn't care for conversation. I was anything but trying to avoid talking with her. That's all I had been trying to do and now she was approaching me and I was fucking it all up.

"No, Osiris it's fine." She pulled away. "I don't expect you to talk to me. We aren't exactly on good terms."

"We could be." I pointed out.

"Maybe it's best we don't get close, it'll make it easier when I leave in spring." She murmured. Her face didn't line up with her words as she winced with every word.

"You still want to leave?" The question tasted vile on my tongue.

"Yes." She hesitated. Phina rubbed her temple with a hiss.

"Why? I can make it up to you. Please, just please let me. You'll see I'm not what you think I am."

She was shaking her head before I could even finish my pleading words. "I have already let you." She said with rueful eyes. "Since the first day you met me you had ample opportunities to change your ways. You choose not to."