"Andy," Robert's soft voice snapped Andy out of her trance the next morning as she placed an earring in. She'd been fomring questions about the lives of everyone she used to know. Were her mother and Ira married. Did Rosie find someone? What happened with Tara and Pippi? There were about a dozen other questions she'd refused to wonder about for years. While she was terrified, seeing how this was more like jumping into a pool of her past without even dipping her toe in first, she was also excited to finally have some answers.

She studied herself in the mirror for a moment, wondering how much she'd changed. She didn't wear her makeup the way she used to. In fact, she barely wore anything at all. Her hair was blonder and she wore a blue long sleeve blouse and black pants, which didn't differ greatly from the way she used to dress. But still, she felt different. She'd been through more, as if she hadn't suffered enough before becoming a firefighter, but by some miracle, she'd been accepted into yet another family. "Are you okay?" He pulled her back before she drifted all of the way back into her own head once again.

"Yeah," she said with a small smile to his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He'd mentioned discovering she was a detective the night before and in response, Andy had opened an investigation. His body. Excited by her infatuation with him, her hunger for him, he played along, but didn't wake up feeling better. He never even knew she'd lived in New York, never mind for several years. This wasn't secrets anymore, it was a hidden identity. "What time's your appointment?" She asked, knowing he was meeting with Amelia Shepherd.

"Three."

"Okay. Again, if your leg huts, don't drive," she reminded him, protectively. "I'll see you tonight."

"Yeah, tonight," he confirmed before leaning in to plant a kiss on her forehead and then exiting the room.

A half an hour later, Andy followed a waiter through a small restaurant flooded with the light from the windows that lined the bck wall. She spotted the table with three familiar faces before they saw her and she gulped, nervously. When grew close enough to draw their attention and her mother landed eyes on her, the conversation stopped immediately.

"Annalise!" Daisy exclaimed, jumping to her feet and rushing to her daughter.

"Hi, mom," she said, softly, giving into her mothers embrace. With only two words, it was clear she was more soft spoken than they remembered her but they assumed it could have been situational. And it was, you looked at it as the situation being whole life at the moment coupled with the return of her insomnia. Ira pulled out a seat for her, telling her he was glad to see her, and they took their seats once again. Rosie studied her carefully for a moment, and while she noticed she didn't exactly want to look at him, fearing eye contact but having no idea why.

"So, Mija, I heard you're a firefighter now. Tell me about it. How do you like it?" Daisy asked, ending the short but uncomfortable silence.

"I love it."

"More than catching murderers?" Asked Ira.

"I don't know," she told him, not having really weighed it in her head, that's how little she let herself think of the past until recently. "It's different. It's nice to see people survive sometimes."

"Yeah, we don't see that a lot in the homocide department," Ira joked.

"I saw an article a few months back. Caught that potential serial killer," she said, remembering him working on the investigation some of her coworkers were on too. That was pretty awesome."

"Longest case of my life."

"But rewarding, I'm sure." For a while, Annalise asked the questions, wanting to hear about the new practice and the members of the Miami location. She asked Rosie about his health, carefully. To which he replied he had a small scare two years before and tried to play it down to nothing, though she still worried. She was shocked to learn that Feldheim had married, which brought them around to the conversation they were bound to have.

"Ira and I are getting married in a few weeks," Daisy informed her daughter. "And I would really love to have you as my maid of honor." Annalise almost choked on her water, taking a moment to swallow properly before she could speak.

"Yes, yes definitely. Congratulations! I'm really happy for you," she said, the moment she could talk, a genuine smile spreading across her face.

"I promise to make this one last," Ira told her, sure she had fears about Daisy ending up hurt, since his marriages had failed before, but she wasn't afraid. He'd waited a long time and their love was still strong.

"So, Villa. Anyone special in your life?" Rosie asked, curiously. She shrugged, part of her still feeling like she needed to keep it a secret since she was so used to it. "What's that mean?"

"Maybe. Still new."

"Ohh, who is he?" Daisy asked, excitedly as a waiter placed her food in front of her. "How did you meet?"

"Uh," she hesitated, afraid to talk about him, seeing how she was so used to keeping it a secret around her team. "Work." She replied, realizing she could be honest as she sat back so the waiter could put hers down. Still, she was careful about the amount of information she gave. At least she tried to be.

"You work with him?" Rosie asked, no doubt in his mind who it was.

"I don't have much of a life outside of my job," Andy admitted with a very small laugh before thanking the waiter.

"It's the man from yesterday, isn't it? The one that looked like he was gonna put me on my own table."

"No," she lied, not wanting to specify the exact person she was seeing.

"Then why was he plotting my murder when you hugged me? Just a strict boss?" He remembered the jacket at the red collar links, as well as his assertive tone. But he'd been paying more attention to Annalise than most boss's might for such a short interaction.

"Robert's not going to kill you." She replied with a small smile, rolling her eyes for a moment at how dramatic he was being, as though she could expect anything less from Beaumont Rosewood.

"Robert? You call your boss by his first name," he observed. "I was right, wasn't I?"

"You're dating your boss?" Daisy exclaimed, without giving her daughter a chance to reply to Rosie, her eyes were wide, astonished by Annalise's actions.

"He's not my boss, he's... okay, yeah, I'm screwed." She looked to Rosie, who was in disbelief. "Stop looking at me like that," she demanded.

"You're dating your boss?" Rosie repeated her mothers words.

"Not my boss," she corrected him, thinking it might not count if he didn't give her as many orders as he once did. Instead, he gave Maya the orders to give her.

"Then who's?"

"The Captain's," she replied, knowing it sounded worse than it felt. It would have been worse when he was the captain. At least now her orders from him were indirect most of the time.

"Your bosses boss?" He replied, loud enough to attract attention from the nearby tables. She rolled her eyes in annoyance.

"Okay, someone please tell me something to use against him."

"Someone dented the GTO and Rosie tried to make a case out of it," Ira informed her. A smile spread across Andy's face and she turned to him.

"Really? Now that- that's a story I need to hear. Please, tell me you tried to get a homicide detective on it."

"Me," Ira commented. Andy shook her head and looked down at her salad, piercing a cucumber with her fork, completely able to picture that in her head.

"So the GTO's still going strong?"

"As ever."

"Got a passenger?"

"Not at the moment. Unfortunately for me, I am my boss. And my boss's boss."

"That's it, no one is allowed to say boss for the rest of this meal." Rosie tucked away his humorous side, sightly concerned.

"Seriously, Villa. That's not like you."

"Yeah, I'm a rule follower, alright," she replied, sarcastically. "Which reminds me, by the way, are you still tagging along on raids and investigations?"

"Not anymore."

"Ah, that's why you haven't gotten yourself shot."

"The lab is plenty exciting. For example-"

"Please talk about dead bodies as we eat." Daisy and Ira shared a glance, reminded of the entertaining interactions they'd witnessed a million times before.

"Actually, I was gonna talk about the flood that ruined half our equipment." For a while, they shared stories and Annalise was happy to listen. Less thrilled when they asked her questions.

"Are you still friends with that boy you grew up with?" Daisy inevitably asked, seeing how Ryan had been such a large part of her life. "The car stealer," she recalled a story Annalise told her when they grew into teenager.

"He stopped doing that."

"You two were together in every photo you sent me-"

"Ma-" she interrupted in a warning tone, wanting to shut down the conversation. "I don't wanna talk about Ryan." Daisy ignored the warning, though, the reason for Andy's aversion to the conversation never even crossing her mind as a possibility.

"I thought you might have gotten back together with him. He was your first, wasn't he?" She tried to recall, embarrassing her daughter in the process.

"Oh my god," She mumbled, looking away from the table.

"The way you used to talk about him- oh, I don't understand why you didn't go back to him. He's cute too-"

"He's dead." She snapped, looking back to her mom, wanting to talk about anything but Ryan. "A three year old shot him. And he died. And I don't want to talk about him." She took a breath to calm down, knowing she probably shouldn't sound pissed when she delivered the next piece of news. "But, while were talking about death, you should probably know that dad's dying too. Cancer. I know you two were never close but still, you should know."

"Mija," Daisy exhaled. While she was sad to hear a man she shared a child with had some type of contact with for years was dying, she really hadn't known him or liked him enough for it to compare to the feeling of her daughter losing a parent. Rosie reached out and grabbed onto her arm, supportively.

"Sorry to ruin lunch like that." She spoke quietly, looking down at the edge of the table.

"You didn't ruin anything." Rosie said. "I'm so sorry you're going through all of that."

"Yeah, well, everyones going through something, right?"

"Yeah," he replied, softly, looking to Ira and Daisy, their faces saying the same thing as his, This something was a lot and a person can only be so strong, even if they are Annalise. The silence was interrupted by a the buzzing of her phone and she took a glance at the number.

"I'm sorry, it's work," she excused herself, slipping out of her seat and heading for the hallway.

"She'll be okay," Ira told Daisy, reading her expression, though he wasn't so sure himself.

"First Eddie, now Ryan. And next, her father. I know my girl, I know what Ryan meant to her. She can't lose her father too." Rosie watched her from afar wondering what he was doing there. Annalise had lost enough. Why get close to her again and then leave her? But he couldn't stop staring at her. He couldn't bear the thought of never seeing her again.

"Everything alright?" He asked when she reproached the table.

"Yeah," she answered, sitting back down but not speaking about the call. She saw no reason to speak of funeral preparations for her teammate that'd gone down.

On the way out, Annalise and her mother made plans for coffee the next morning before her shift and she temporarily said goodbye.

"So," she began, walking to her car next to Rosie. The clouds were thick and threatened to drench them, but for now, Rosie welcomed the rare change from the bright sun beaming down on Miami. "You're really doing well?" She asked, eyeing his chest, though she couldn't see the scar through his clothing.

"I am. You don't have to worry about me." She smiled lightly.

"But I do. A lot." She sighed. "How serious are you about opening a lab here?"

"It's cheaper than New York. Warmer than Chicago."

"I don't think the temperature matters much if you're back in Miami," she laughed.

"And theres a trial at Grey-Sloan. One I would really like to get in on." Annalise immediately turned her head from where she was walking to Rosie.

"How promising is it?"

"The results so far have been outstanding. And I wanna be here as long as I can. I have an appointment tomorrow to find out of I'm eligible."

"That's- that's amazing, Rosie! Make them call me so I can tell them just how much you deserve it. I mean, I've never seen anyone so obsessed with living- I have never seen anyone cherish life so much. I'll be a reference."

"Trials don't work that way-"

"I don't care how trials work. I care that they work. And if they work, that you're in them." He smiled, glad to see her so excited about something, even if he might receive the placebo if he got in.

"Well, I don't exactly live the way I used to." He admitted, feeling guilty for letting her believe that.

"What do you mean?" She asked, leaning against her car.

"Ah, the blue cop car is no longer!"

"Rosie, what do you mean?" She asked, ignoring his comment/ attempt to change the subject.

"I just- I still stay healthy. I just-" you opened my eyes. I saw what I was missing and when you were gone, what I used to have wasn't what it once was. "I don't hang onto things."

"Your family?"

"Yes. I hold onto them. But I don't know. Time's fleeting. I'm afraid to savor anything. To start anything. I might go all in and never finish. Start working towards something and never get there. I don't wanna love someone just to leave them behind. Sometimes it feels like I'm just waiting to go."

"Don't talk like that. You don't get to know how much time you have. No one does. Don't prepare for the end. Just live until you can't." He nodded, though he wouldn't look at her.

"Look, Rosie, you know how to appreciate life far better than I do, which is why I know you also believe, when you're really down to the wire, you don't wanna regret waiting to enjoy life- to enjoy love just because you're afraid." Seeing she was starting to lose him, she sighed, shutting her eyes and gathering the strength to explain.

"The day Ryan died, he told me he loved me. I had feelings for him and I didn't tell him what I wanted and he found someone else and moved to San Diego." She opened her eyes and looked away, off towards the water, the breeze blowing her hair out of her face. "But he came back and he told me he loved me. And then a toddler pointed a gun at us and then he was dead. Just like that." With a sigh, she gathered the courage to turn her eyes directly to him.

"I've had a lot of love, Rosie, but I'm damn used to losing it. Trust me. Don't tiptoe around what you want. When you can't have it anymore, it's torture to sit there and think what could have been... I could never understand what you're going to go through. But I can tell you, I'm jealous of Ryan. He doesn't have to look back on the amount of time he kept quiet. That's me." Rosie wanted to pull her into a hug right there and form a shield around her so the world couldn't take anything else away from her.

"Just- don't stop living because you're going to die." He gave her a small smile and reached for her hand, which rested on the car she was leaning back against. He was thanking for her words even if they were clearly hurting her. But she would do anything to try to help him.

"Thank you, Villa. I've missed you. I wish I could have stopped this. Saved Ryan. I hate that you've been hurting."

"I'll be fine."

"Is that why you're dating your boss?" He asked curiously. "You decided love wasn't worth the rules."

"No. If I really listened to myself," she inhaled, her breath shaky. "I wouldn't have called... Anyways, I should get going. Don't leave before I see you again," she said, as she lifted and straightened her leg out so it reached him and bumped him in the calf while smiling. He smiled back as she rounded her car and headed out.

Andy drove straight to the station, where she beat the punching bag with every emotion she had in her. She always liked kickboxing when she was dealing with emotions. No matter what had her down or confused or really anything, she could turn it into something physical. She worked until she was drained of everything she had and collapsed on the floor, drenched in sweat and breathing like she'd never inhaled air before.

-

A/N- how tf did this chapter get so long? I edited it last night and I fell asleep in the middle of it! But hopefully you don't because that would reflect terribly on my writing skills...