"I just don't get it, is she holding your ransom? Is she blackmailing you? Dude seriously, blink twice Trist if you need help."

Tristian laughs off my questions in his typical good nature, though I have seen once or twice a darker side of him. Luna knows how to get herself in trouble and Tristian has no problem jumping in and protecting her when that does happen. He may not be the biggest guy or the strongest but he will take on anyone that dares to disrespect Luna. Minus me, because me and Lulu we are frenemies, so it is different.

"How long have you two been together?" Stan asks as he drops the weights he was curling with and joins us over at the squat rack.

"4 years," he smiles fondly.

"Afternoon whipped bitches," Bray greets as he walks into the gym. Me, Stan and Bray have a standing Saturday workout during the off season. Even during the summer when I was here and they were both home they'd drive here on Saturdays just for our workout. Yesterday night I texted Tristian and extended an invite. We even have a group chat with the 4 of us called 509 Boyfriends.

"You're also a whipped bitch," I point out.

"Don't kink shame," Bray teases with a wink.

I spin around again and lock eyes with Tristian. "Does Luna tie you up? I feel like Luna is the type to do that."

"Ryder, why do you care?" Stan asks, looking slightly disturbed. So much for a judgment free zone, damn.

"Because Stan she...she...she's the devil and he is so nice! I don't get it!"

"Surprisingly Luna is actually a very sensitive person... but don't tell her I said that," he rushes. "But she is, she is super sensitive but she also has strong opinions and she isn't going to bite her tongue to please anyone. It is why the skating community kinda pushes back and tries to make her more like, well more like Francesca honestly. It's why Luna tried to switch roommates right before moving in freshman year."

"Luna and Francesca weren't always friends?" Bray says in disbelief.

"It's not that they weren't friends. Ok well they weren't, but they didn't hate each other that's for sure. But they both were out of place in the community for different reasons. Luna was too loud, too abrasive, she wasn't ladylike enough. While Fran had that part, she was always fighting an uphill battle compared to everyone else who had hours and hours of these former Olympian trainers training them and such. Each for different reasons were kind of being overlooked by judges and especially Team USA for Olympic spots, even though they were both competing at that level."

"So, you kind of get screwed because of Luna? Did you ever think about switching partners?" I ask curiously.

"No, not even for a second. Luna is more than just my skating partner and if I couldn't do this with her I would retire. I only have a passion for skating because of her. I love skating with her."

"But you love the sport too, right?" I probe.

Tristian just shrugs looking indifferent as he begins a new set of squats with me as his spot.

When Tristian finishes his set and Bray begins to re rack so he can go; Tristian continues his story. "Anyways the week before move in we got our room assignments. Luna freaked out the second she saw Francesca was her roommate. She called the school and begged them to switch her but they told her they couldn't. Luna basically cried the entire week and all of move in day but the second she met Fran that was it."

"My girl is easily lovable," I beam proudly. She has a true talent of turning the cold people soft, me and Luna are prime examples of that.

"Luna would agree. You know she actually really likes you Ryder."

I scoff not believing him for a second.

"She does," he insists. "She is just... well she is a little jealous. Which sounds dumb because she has me and there is no doubt she wants Francesca to be happy but she feels replaced. Before you, she only talked to Luna and Luna would drop our plans in a heartbeat if Fran needed her. Now there are times when Luna has no idea what is going on in her life because she talks to you about it instead."

"I'm not trying to replace Luna."

"She knows, it's just new to her but trust me she is so happy Francesca is with you. She thinks you're a great guy, even if she doesn't exactly show it."

I smile nodding my head. "Good to know Trist."

We work out for about 2 hours before calling it quits. Well technically they work out I get in some light reps but I spend more time spotting my friends and talking than anything else. This is my first major injury and the whole healing process sure is a bitch. I just can't wait to be cleared again and get back to work.

As we walk into one of the on campus dining halls for lunch I peek at Tristian who is texting Luna. He didn't tell me he is texting her but I can tell by his demeanor. He isn't a shy guy but he is quiet, more an observer than anything else. But when he is talking to her or about her he becomes more animated. It is the same way Stan gets more confident with Maya and Bray mellows out with Parker.

"Hey," I whisper to Bray as we stand in line waiting to get food. "Am I different?"

"What?" he asks loudly, not getting the concept of me trying to be discreet.

"Sh dude. I said 'am I different', like I don't know now that I am with Beck have I changed?"

Bray chuckles to himself as we both grab some chicken and shakes his head. "You don't see it, which is honestly kind of cute. Not that it is bad that you've changed. I would say it is great actually. Seeing you smile so much, hearing you full on laugh instead of locking yourself away in solitude. It makes me less worried about you. I don't worry about what is going to happen after we leave this place, that you will be alone."

"You worried?" I am so in shock I miss my plate as I serve myself some vegetables.

"No shit I worried? I worried about you the same way you called me everyday last summer asking if I came out to my parents yet and hyping me up."

"I didn't think..." I pause, not sure what to say next.

"I might not have said it and maybe that is my bad because I didn't realize you needed to hear it but I love you Ryder, you're my brother for life man."

A wave of overwhelming emotions rushes over me as I look at Bray. I never said it, shit I didn't even get it until I met Francesca, but of course I love him, different than how I love her of course but I do. Him and Stan. "I- I love you Bray, seriously promise we will always have this."

"Oh motherfucker you're stuck with me," he smiles before walking off to the table to sit with the other two guys while I replay in my head the second person to ever said they loved me.

After lunch we all head straight to the apartment. Joke all you want that we are all pathetic and whipped, none of us will deny it. Just four poor bastards deeply in love.

The apartment when we walk in is chaos. Luna is stress crying in Frans arms causing Tristian to spring into action. Maya is stress baking, when we walk in and distract her she grabs a hot pan and burns herself; Stan breaks away instantly to tend to her. Parker is in his room but based on the way Bray power walks to the door and threatens to kick it down he isn't faring any better than his roommates. Then there is Francesca, in the middle of it all with the a brave face trying to take care of everyone else.

I scoop her up and take her into her bedroom ignoring the dirty look she shoots me. Yeah, whatever broken ribs, we get it Francesca like that will ever stop me. "How are you," I check in as I set her on the bed.

"I am good," she smiles but it is a weak one that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"Lying is a sin," I tease while kissing her forehead.

"Jesus died for our sins, if we don't sin then he died for nothing," she argues playfully. A spark of her normal self comes back and I relax a little. It is almost insane how her mood affects fine. Moments before walking into this apartment I was riding this insane high and now every muscle in my body is tense because she is upset.

"Beck," I warn.

"Ryder," she smiles knowing how easy she can make me cave to her every whim.

I narrow my eyes but she leans forward and captures my lips and it is officially game over. I melt into her rolling us both onto her bed. I was never a fan of losing before Francesca; it made me feel weak, like a disappointment. But now losing comes with perks like feeling her legs straddling my stomach while her fingers pull at my hair.

I pull back a little to assess her mood again. "You need to stop trying to carry the world."

"Rich coming from you," she scoffs but her eyes soften. "Besides, it's not the world."

"Fine, then apartment 509 whatever it is you need to take care of yourself as much as you take care of them."

"They needed me to be strong," she defends weakly.

"When was the last time the roles were reversed?" I point out not because I think her roommates wouldn't do the same but because she doesn't let them.

"When you took back..."

I swallow uneasily. Francesca is strong, she doesn't break and when she does she does it alone so not to worry anyone else. But that day she couldn't do it alone, because of something I caused. "Before that," I press, attempting to change the subject.

I am met with silence. As I thought I would be.

"You're allowed to be stressed too babe."

"I have so much to do and I feel like I have no time to do it," she sighs while curling up against me. I hold her tightly, kissing the top of her hair and rubbing her back gently.

"What if we spent all day in the library? No distractions, just the two of us hidden away from the world."

"What if someone needs me?"

I pick Francesca up again and lead her out into the hall where all three of her roommates are being cared for by their respective boyfriends. "I think they're all in good hands," I assure her.

"Ok," she concedes, relaxing against me like some huge weight was just lifted off her shoulders. It is only 1:30 so hopefully this will get her enough time to study but still get a full night's sleep. Both of us are notorious for fortifying sleep for other priorities but I am trying to get us both into better routines. Well no, I am trying to get her into better routines but she sleeps over enough that it has forced me to be better too.

Francesca packs her stuff up while I run home and grab my own stuff. I pick her up again and we head to the library. I have only been here twice before but it is clear she knows exactly where she wants to be as soon as we walk in.

Once we are settled we both zone in on our work and don't speak for hours at a time. Studying gets overwhelming but with Francesca to my left I manage to power through. Whenever one of us starts to get too worked up we bump elbows like at the end of our handshake as just a little sign of support.

I need a break around 6:30 so I grab us dinner. We both eat while we work and don't look up again until it is 11:30 and Francesca is starting to get jittery. "Time to call it a night?" I ask hoping she won't put up a fight.

"Please, I need some sleep," she yawns, slamming her computer shut.

"We can check on your phone too. It has been over 24 hours so hopefully the rice did its job." I know the stress of her phone is still lurking in the back of her mind. I don't tell her that I charged it this morning and thankfully it turned on. I didn't play with it beyond that but just turning on felt like a promising start.

On the walk to the car Francesca skips next to me swinging our hands. It is late at night but she seems to be in much higher spirits than she was hours ago. The fresh air must give her a second wind because she starts talking a mile a minute about some math theory that goes way over my head. I try to listen and engage in the conversation but the whole thing is was too complex for me.

"Did I lose you?" she giggles sweetly as we walk into the house.

"A tad but that's ok cutie."

She blushes at the compliment. I pull her close to me and kiss her nose because she is so cute sometimes. God, I fucking love this girl so much it is insane.

"Do you think it will work?" she asks as we walk into my room.

"If it doesn't it will be ok babe, I promise."

She nods but I see the look in her eyes. She isn't good at hiding her emotions with me which I am somewhat grateful for. It makes it easier for me to help her.

Slowly she removes the phone from the rice and plugs it in. Just like for me it instantly comes to life. I watch holding my breath as she unlocks the phone and begins using it. A few texts come in from people who weren't here yesterday when it got wet. A smile grows on her face as she begins to type a text to her family group chat letting them know her phone is working. I planned to buy her a new phone but since this one is working I guess I will wait. Maybe if I get it for her birthday she will be less mad I am spending money on her.

I don't rush her, instead I get ready for bed and grab her a shirt of mine to sleep in. I place the shirt on her lap and she wastes no time putting it on and curling up into bed.

I climb in next to her and we both lay in the quiet dark. "Bray told me he loves me today," I blurt, the familiar warmth spreading through my body again.

"You deserve to know you're loved," she tells me and even in the dark I can tell she is staring at me, her eyes full of nothing but pure love for me.

"I am learning, I know now I am not alone in this world."

"And you never will be," she tells me before pulling my face toward hers to kiss me.