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I sat in Montana's living room feeling like shit, I regretted all the shit I did and I just wished I could take it back to make it right. I'd just hurt the only girl that I ever truly loved, the only girl that ever truly loved me through everything and now she was gone. And I knew there was nothing I could do to stop her from leaving me because she's stubborn. She's not taking me back no matter what.

Sighing, I stood to my feet, about to leave before I heard her light snores all the way in the living room.

Deciding I couldn't just leave, I stopped in my tracks and headed towards her room. I needed to see her face one more time before I left.

Walking into the room, I stood over her, admiring everything about her. My eyes kept reverting to the bruise under her eye and I just wanted to know where that shit came from.

"I'll protect you forever, Montana." I spoke softly, just watching her. Whoever put their hands on my girl would feel me.

Standing there, I knew this would probably be my last time seeing her for a while so I wanted to make it count. I watched as she pouted in her sleep and I couldn't help but to sigh. She even looked sad in her sleep.

I knew I'd really messed up now and I just wanted to make it all better for her. But I also knew there wasn't shit I could do even if I tried. Time was the only thing that could heal this.

Coming to a realization, I sat down at the edge of her bed.

"I'm gon' make it up to you, baby." I went onto say as if she could hear me.

"I promise." I spoke lowly, turning around to look at her once more.

I then stood to my feet, about to leave before I decided I couldn't go. I had to spend the rest of my night here with her. I couldn't just walk out on her.

Not my baby.

Pulling my shirt over my head, I threw it onto the floor then removed my shoes. Slowly getting into the bed with her, I laid beside her and just watched. She hadn't moved an inch and she was still softly snoring. I'd missed this, this was all I wanted to do from the beginning. Before any of this went down, all I wanted to do was love my girl.

Pressing my luck, I wrapped my arm around her waist and rested it there. Moving closer to her, I began to trail kisses along the nap of her neck. I couldn't resist her.

"I love you." I spoke softly.

Her light snoring subsided as I did and I knew that she was now awake but I didn't care. I would take all the yelling and screaming if I could just lay here and hold her.

"Joey." She whined softly, trying to pull away from me but I held her tight against me.

Gripping her waist, I turned her to me and made her give me a kiss.

"Stop it." She tried to say but my lips were glued to hers.

"I can't. I love you, baby." I spoke in between kisses as she tears began to fall from her eyes.

"I'm sorry." I shook my head, removing my lips from hers.

"You're not sorry." She spoke softly, obviously not buying my words.

"I am sorry, Montana." I began to trail down to her stomach and kissed all over it.

"Joey, please stop." She said to me, clearly fed up with my shit but I couldn't stop. I needed her.

"I can't, ma. I can't let you go." I spoke against her skin as she closed her legs tight once she realized what I was trying to do.

"No." She begged, pushing me.

Pulling her legs apart, I got in between them as she looked up at me with glossy eyes.

"Don't tell me no, Montana." I told her as I kissed on her thighs, making her moan.

"Joey, no." She tried pushing my head.

"Just stop. I don't want this anymore." She continued pushing but I kept kissing.

As she protested, I swiftly pulled her small pajama shorts then her panties to the side and licked all over her Girl.

"Mm." She moaned unwillingly, pushing my head away.

"Stop it, Joey. Stop it." She started hitting me but I held her legs tightly and sucked on her pearl harder, making her arch her back.

Moaning loudly, she shut her mouth and let me eat. I knew I was wrong for doing this when she didn't want it but I couldn't resist her. She was the one I wanted.

These others girls I was using to fill her spot, to make me feel better, to fill that void but they could never. She was the only girl that could ever satisfy me and I was okay with that.

When she reached her climax, I came back up and looked into her eyes. She had tears in her eyes and I felt sick. I couldn't believe I'd hurt her like this.

"I'm gon' make it up to you, baby. I promise." I pleaded, feeling myself getting choked up.

"I promise, okay?"

"There's nothing you can do to take this pain away, Joey. You know that didn't change anything and it never will." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hands.

I was hearing her but I didn't want to believe that this was really over. I couldn't just throw 9 years away.

Fuck that.

Lowering my sweats, I abruptly pushed myself into her as she screamed.

"Ow! Stop, Josiah!" She yelled at me as I pinned her hands above her head.

"No! No! No!"

"You don't get to have me anymore!" She continued to yell, tears falling from her face.

"Stop it!" She pushed at my chest as I went deeper and deeper, her screams becoming nonexistent after every stroke.

She began to cry again as I laid my head into the crook of her neck, leaving small kisses. She then wrapped her arms around me and began to scratch my back.

"I hate you." She moaned, tears rolling from her face rapidly.

"Don't say that to me." I pleaded, feeling myself about to reach my peak.

"I'm so sorry for hurting you." I repeated, biting my lip and leaning back up to look in her eyes.

"I love you."

"I love you, Joey.." She said back to me, making me release inside of her.

"Shit." I groaned, still stroking. I really didn't expect her to say it back to me but I was glad she did.

"I love you so much." She moaned out again as I went harder. She was giving me motivation, she had me thinking we still had a chance.

"..but I'll never take you back." She managed to say and I stopped all together, pulling out of her.

Looking at each other, we didn't say a thing but I knew she was done with me for real.

"Can you please leave like I asked. If you thought you could make this better with sex, you're sadly mistaken." She rolled her eyes and I nodded.

"Aight. I'm leaving." I told her, putting my shit back on then walking out.

"And don't come back, Josiah. I don't want to see you no more." She spat and that shit broke my heart but I understood her pain.

She had every right.

*

"Nigga, get your ass back to that center before they lock you up." Messiah said to me as I stood on the corner with him and I nodded.

"I am. I just had to come out here and see what's up. Too much shit been happening around here while I'm up there."

"Well Montana got into with the shawty Kim like I said would happen."

"What that mean?" I asked and he raised his eyebrows.

"They was all out there fighting." He said and I looked at him.

"That's why her face look like that." I shook my head, thinking about the bruise of Monty's face.

"I'll kill that bitch for touching my girl." I spoke, referring to Kim and I meant every word.

"Can't kill her, she's carrying your baby." He chuckled and I scoffed.

"I didn't even cum and I used a condom so that bitch lying. She's just tryna make my girl mad but that's cool.." I trailed off, already knowing how this was going to play out.

"Why what's up?"

"Nothing." I shook my head. I'd keep this one to myself.

"Just do me a favor and make sure Montana stay good. I'm gon' be up at the center for about 5-6 more months."

"I need you to look out for her and keep money in her pocket for me. My stash is in my room.." I explained and he nodded.

"I know she ain't gon' take it willingly so just put it in her mailbox or some shit every once in a while. Or let ma give it to her."

"Aight. I got you, bro."

"I need you to do this for me, bro. Seriously." I expressed desperately and he nodded.

"Bro, I said I got you."

"That's my heart and I know I fucked up but I want to make it right for her. For the both of us." I got chocked up, just thinking about her and the pain I caused.

"You got it, baby bro. Just work on you. I'll make sure she's good until you get back even though she slapped the shit out of me." He chuckled and I nodded, wiping my eye.

"Whatchu cryin' nigga?" He laughed harder and I had to do the same. Monty didn't know how much of an effect she had on me and I guess I didn't understand how much of an effect I had on her either.

"Man, just stay safe and watch over them for me."

"You talking like this the end, man." He shook his head.

"Nah. I just need you to stay down, bro."

"Man, you already know. This shit for life." He dapped me up before pulling me in for a man hug.

"I love you, nigga."

"Love you, man."

*

👀🙂