《Theory [TOM HOLLAND]》FORTY ONE
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nerd nation
i have good news guys!
it's a trap
mel never uses exclamation marks
no i'm serious
what could you possibly consider good news
what do you mean
you called it "bad news" when i got my casts because my broken legs were finally healed
legs? plural?
i broke both my legs sophomore year
wasn't my fault that time
doing what?
i jumped off the roof of a frat house
are you serious
i was testing a parachute
it was a plastic bag tied around his neck with fruit by the foot
but that was two years ago when i was young and dumb
you did the same thing last week
ah the heartless wench speaks
i am not heartless
i consider certain things good news
it's just that when you got your casts off you lost your handicap permit
which i used to park in the handicap spots
is that why every time we hung out you ran errands
yeah the handicap spot at trader joe's is a+
you're definitely going to hell mel
that's why it rhymes
i'm very curious to know what mel considers good news now
did a new office depot open up
did you make someone cry
did carl sagan return from the dead
*carl sajan
ha
how dare you disgrace his name sajan
and no my candlelit shrine reminds me of that every day
maybe the good news is that hector quit decathlon
i'm still here bitch
damn
stop being crusty for one second so i can tell you the good news
okay what is it
ready?
we're going to nationals!!!
HOLY SHIT
no way!!
we made it??
WE'RE GOING TO CONQUER THE WORLD
THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES WILL BOW AT OUR FEET
oh my god oh my god oh my god
time for a celebratory bonfire!!!!
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sajan no
you never let me do anything fun
speaking of which
it's time to calm down
mel this is exciting we don't need to calm down
you need to calm UP
i know this is exciting but it's also serious
we need to get down to business
aw come on mel
sorry but there's not going to be any fucking around this time
right because last time was just a three month long party
i'm serious
we're going to meet 4 times a week
every other sunday we'll hold a practice competition
no one is allowed to bring anything flammable
and i'm banning all alcohol and drugs
seriously mel??
i need you sharp and sober if we're going to win
we would never touch alcohol or satan's vine
you mean the devil's lettuce
exactly no one goes near lucifer's quinoa
you're right forget that weak shit
i know where to get the good stuff
uh oh
no my guy is reputable
he has all his fingernails and only lives under a bridge part time
yup that's a no
i never know where to end these things. anyway here's another healthy serving of nerd nation because i would die for each and every one of my messy children
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