In the process of growing up, thoughts about feeling fondness towards a different person did came to my mind.

Taking strolls with them, spending a night at a hotel room with them, drinking wine at that hotel room with them, going on vacations with them, having normal but wholesome conversations with them, and kissing them freely with all your heart's content.

I thought about those thinking that, that person will be my boyfriend, or possibly, my husband.

However, I did each of that with Vernon. The person whom I met here in Spain by chance, us being tourists by chance and somehow, developed some sort of sexual tension by chance.

Yes, he is a potential boyfriend, but on the very beginning, he was never a boyfriend, at least until now that he doesn't ask for any commitment, not like I'm expecting one from him..

Oh, who am I trying to kid? I do am expecting. Now that we've been kissing way too much than how a 'simple way of showing affection' can define.

I don't even know what he truly thinks of me, in a sense that we did 'such things' together. . .

As soon as his right hand left my cheek, I felt it land on the top first button of my pyjama shirt.

'Okay?, so where the hell is this going?'

Somehow, that became an awakening for me or something, because the whole entire time, I have just been mindlessly kissing him. Or perhaps it was just the effect of kissing.

I placed my hands on both sides of his hips, feeling the hem of his shirt on my palms. And a short second after that, from the zero distance between our body, he took a step back and broke the kiss.

He was catching his breath, looking down at me with a straight face, and words seemed to plan on not coming out from his lips at all.

I tightened my grip on the hem of his shirt, and as I drew my lower lip between my teeth, I lifted his black shirt up, undressed it off of him and dropped it on the floor without breaking contact from his eyes.

A smirk grew on his face. "I didn't even took off yours..", he whispered in the most attractive tone.

I briefly glanced down on the untouched buttons of my shirt, grinning as I look back up again to face him, slightly raising my eyebrows. "Well.."

After a second more of our staring right into each other's eyes which seemed to mean more than just such, his lips came crashing onto mine again, and it made me feel like he really had wanted it.

It was another night that I didn't want to forget, a night so breathtaking, and amazing, and appealing, and irresistible, and warm, and every nice words that I could gather in a dictionary to describe how that night went, and how every moment was with him.

It was an unusual sight the following day, for the first time in the many mornings I woke up at my hotel room, Vernon was sleeping there right beside me as we shared the blanket.

It somehow has gotten to me now by the amount of times that he's on sight, sometimes even starting the day watching him sleep in peace.

I should be confused by now, questioning myself on how I have ended up in such a situation, but for some reason, everything felt a bit more normal, as if I had gotten way more used to the present set up.

Once already starting the day, Vernon and I agreed on getting breakfast outside, at some famous near the hotel restaurant. Sitting on one of the outside tables, I could still see our hotel building.

It was a last minute plan, by the way, almost too abrupt that we only managed to change on comfortable clothes without taking a shower.

"This is one of the best breakfast I've ever had in here.", I commented while enjoying the local foods we ordered, my mouth not having a chance on being empty every second I swallow.

"I can't disagree more.", I heard him chuckle. "I mean, those were the exact same words that I said the first time I ate here.", I looked up at him with a smile. It felt great hearing bits of his life every now and then.

"Who were you with?", I asked, half curious and half mindlessly. It wasn't that relevant, yes, or even my business, but, at the same time, it felt like it was. I mean, I just really wanted to know.

"Does it matter?", He questioned back, and his face was unreadable.

"Sorry?", From being seventy five percent curious, I have now became utterly confused, for reasons that I don't know.

It became quiet for like a second or two, until he out of a sudden laughed which left me to becoming even more bewildered. "Just kidding.", I blinked my eyes for a couple of times. "I was with a guy friend. Actually, the one who I met up with yesterday."

I'm pretty sure it was his way on messing with me, to you know, make me think things, and like what he probably had planned, I was cornered for a moment.

"Oh.", I nodded my head in a not so sure way. "Uhm. . does he live here? Guessing from how you constantly meet up with him.", Great, what a way to start a conversation again. It's not like I didn't care about his guy friend, but, it was such a random question and I don't even know that guy friend of his, let alone the name.

He clicked his tongue. And he didn't seem to have care much about why I had that question. "Well, he's not from here. . but he lives way more here. It's pretty confusing."

"No. Not at all.", His brows softly lifted as he smiled. "Do you plan on doing that too? Living here, I mean."

"Why? Do I seem like I will?", His smile became even more wider.

"Maybe?"

"Well, maybe. Maybe I will.", His face softened, and somehow, he looked so genuine. "You know, eversince I first came here, whenever I come here, all I experience is bliss and the never-ending excitement."

"I'm sure you'll have so much fun if you do choose to live here. You seem to like this place a lot."

"What about you?", He asked.

I was wordless for a moment, taken aback and realizing that I have not asked myself about that as well. "Me? It's quite impossible for me to live here.", That's how depressing my life is. Sad and broke.

"No. What I mean is, why is it that it's not we that'll have fun if we choose to live here?", He said, not looking as if he was joking the very least.

My lips parted slightly. There was no way he was serious.

I knew very well that this relationship we currently have will lead to nowhere, that once this whole trip will end, nothing will remain the same.

"Of course.", I nodded with a smile plastered on my face.

By the looks of his face, he seemed confused, and believe me, I was just about as confused as he was.

What did I exactly mean by 'of course'? Of course, that we will have so much fun if we choose to live here? Or, just a random, Of course, because I didn't know what to say.

We went back to the hotel after finally clearing our plates, and after that random 'of course', our conversation has shifted to a different topic since, which made me felt relieved.

"I'll come by at two.", I nodded at what he said. We agreed on, then again, to stroll at some part of the city where I haven't been yet.

I unlocked the door of my hotel room, while he was standing there beside it.

I smiled at him as I slowly held open the door. "I'll get in now. .", My eyes, for some reason, constantly switched from looking at him to looking at my quarter opened door and back to his face again.

A lot of things were running inside my mind, and probably one of it was. . "This."

I let go of my doorknob, slightly stood on my toes for me to reach him, extended my right arm to hold his cheek, and closing my eyes, I found my self pressing my lips on his.

If only ditching my job to live with him here won't require me to become even more broke, I would willingly do it.

If only I was more assured of what we truly were. . .

I took a step back and held my doorknob again. "See you at two.", I said, giving him a smile before going inside. . like what I have done approximately eight seconds ago.