《Not Anyone | Vernon Chwe》Chapter 21
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The current day marked the second week of my trip. I told myself fourteen days ago that if in just a week, I'll feel better already, maybe then I'd consider going back. And frankly, I already was feeling better — way more than better.
I could consider going home, yes. I was free to go home since the pain of a break up, a bit surprisingly, had erased from my feelings already.
I didn't even think about it with a rational mind, tried all that I was capable of to get over it for me to overcome it. It was as easy as forgetting a usual yesterday.
However though, in a matter of two weeks or fourteen days or three hundred thirty six hours, I met a guy, got into this whatever relationship that we have, and yeah, unconsciously helped me overcome what I truly came here for.
I don't know if I should be greatful to Vernon for 'unconsciously helping me overcome what I truly came here for', or feel the otherwise towards him because of the 'whatever relationship that we have'.
I shook my head to shrug off the thought. I shouldn't think of him this much, or at least the latter that I had just thought.
The sun was probably doing something to my brain, possibly. It was a tuesday, eight in the morning and I had made a quick errand for the usual necessities.
As I rummaged the inside of the paper bag that I was holding, checking that contents of it, wether I have forgotten something or if I will need anything more, I felt a small pressure, yet strong enough for me to take a step back, on my shoulder.
I immediately looked up to the person whom I accidentally bumped into and apologized. "Lo siento."(I'm sorry.)
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That situation seemed a lot like my fault, guessing from her face that she looked quite surprised, but eventually pulled out a smile. "Está bien, yo también lo siento.", She said. (It's okay, I too am sorry.)
The only words that I understood from her were the words 'lo siento'. And there, I have come to realize that I should study more about the language rather than just hang out with Vernon.
I apologized to her once again with a sorry smile and gradually left with an obvious awkward walk as I didn't know what to say to her anymore. Not like she wanted to build a conversation with me, but it would make me feel guilty to just leave with just saying sorry, which was what I was doing at the moment.
If only I could say 'I'm sorry once again. I didn't mean to bump into you. If you wouldn't, I will go ahead first, goodbye.' or something as formal like that in Spanish.
I did know the Spanish word for goodbye, but it would be weird for some reason to just say 'lo siento, adiós.' which meant 'sorry, goodbye.', most especially when she doesn't know that I'm just a tourist.
I continued to walk my way back to the hotel building, and at some point when I got off the lift, from the distance, I saw Vernon infront of my hotel room, who seemed to be in deep thoughts.
He looked kinda cute actually, looking like he seemed to be debating with himself.
"Hi.", I greeted him as soon as I got closer to him, facing his back.
He turned around almost instantly. "Oh, hey. . wait.", His facial expression shifted from lowkey contemplation into a confused one in a matter of second. "You were out?", He asked, sounding almost like he as well didn't believe himself.
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"Yeah.", I shortly answered, slightly lifting the paper bag that I was holding with a shrug.
In a second or two, his confused face turned, unknowingly, tensed and nervous. I chose to not give it much thought, because nonetheless, it will remain unknown unless I ask him about it.
"What brings you here, by the way?"
He took a moment to look around him, and not looking as tensed and nervous as before but still seemed quite tensed and nervous, he cleared his throat.
"I came here to. . uh. . ", He played with his fingers, appearing to be contemplating a lot. "Liv. .", He called my name, and I swear to whatever, there was really something with my name on his voice.
"Yes?"
"There's this. . uh. . this park that gets really pretty at night. . I've been told by my friend. . and I have actually been there once, but I. .", This version of him; struggling to find words, stammering, seemed to be uneasy and all; it was different. He has never been like this talking to me before. "What am trying to say is— can I ask you out. . tonight?", He had finally said and concluded, and he seemed more calm now that he did.
"Yes, sure.", I answered while giving him a smile. I may seemed and appeared calm on the outside, trying not to get overly excited, but deep inside, I could hear those squeals from some part of my mind.
It felt great seeing how he cared a lot. How he cared for my time and my opinion. It was so great of him to ask in this way.
He smiled, not forced and timid, but, instead genuine. "Alright. . okay.", He pursed his lips before continuing his words. "That's— uh. . that's the only thing that I actually came here for. .", He scratched the back of his neck.
"Oh, really?", I was as surprised in the inside as the words I said, that sounded quite in exclaimed.
"Yes. . apparently.", He answered, with his hand still at the back of his head. I nodded, not knowing what to say anymore, yet sooner or later, his eyes went somewhere down. "Do you need a hand with those?", He asked, pertaining to the paper bag on my hands.
I slightly shook my head. "No, I'm good. It's not that much anyway."
He looked at me with an understanding nod. "Then. . I'll get going first. I'll see you tonight, Liv."
I nodded then again, and that was probably a sign for him to leave. I turned around to look at his back that was leaving for the elevator.
He left sooner that I've expected, sooner than anything brief, and sooner than how I wanted.
Nevertheless, I'll still meet him tonight at the park.
I wish what was in between us felt like the idea of parks at night, now some whatever.
I unlocked the door of my hotel room, tilting my head, not quite sure what to feel.
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