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Subtlety was an art; Joshua had concluded over the years. He'd had to be subtle in both worlds, careful about what he said and did, and subtle with the right people. He'd managed to balance it well; he kept Emilia hoodwinked about the Drifting, and he'd managed to keep their affair subtle over the years.

Until he found Amelia. The funny thing about art was that when one got distracted, it changed. When he and Amelia found out about their Knot Art, Joshua had changed. He wasn't subtle any longer, he didn't care.

He was sloppy, desperate, and as he looked at Emilia as she put a cup of steaming coffee in front of him, he was glad. He didn't have to fake emotions any longer. He didn't have to pretend he was something he wasn't or wasn't something he was.

"Josh told me everything. Or you know, the other Josh," she said. Her voice was higher than Amelia's, the scar just above her lip was prominent with her un-made-up face, her brunette hair up in a messy bun.

He quickly realised he'd been in love with this Emilia once upon a time, not long ago. Everything changed when he came to know Amelia and realised that she was his magnet.

Joshua didn't realise how much emotions could fluctuate, how much things could change in an instant, with one word, with one touch of a Knot, with one kiss.

Until he met Amelia.

Just like Brianna, Amelia knew how to swoop in, flip everything he knew, build him up. Yet the fundamental difference between Brianna and Amelia was that Amelia would never sweep him out and kick him down. He knew she wouldn't because beneath all the angst and anger over Owen, she loved him. Knot or not, they had chemistry and they both knew it. They were meant to be together whether they were Fated or not.

"For ease's sake, call him Josh, and me Joshua. Life gets confusing when you live two different lives with people of the same name," Joshua said.

She scoffed. "How does something like this happen? Parallel universes? Two versions of everyone? I've been shagging two different versions of you—"

"We don't know how it happens, but I'm Fated to Amelia, well, you, in the other world. Probably the reason why, or at least some of it," he said. "But why I am? Well, that's a mystery. Maybe something went wrong during whatever they do to match people, but it's a thing. So, Josh and I are trying to do something called a Declaration, which would mean he stays here, and I stay there. We tried it before, but clearly, it didn't work. He says he loves you, and I love Amelia there. Obviously being Fated helps."

She took it in and nodded as she sipped her drink. "So... you love her?"

"You love him?" Joshua countered.

"Touché. So... I don't know what there is to ask, I mean, Josh explained everything to me; the Declaration, the fact you both feel better in the other worlds to the one you were born into... I guess all I have to really ask is, did you ever love me at all, Joshua?" Emilia asked him.

She didn't look at him while she spoke, and that had always been one thing that irritated him about her. Amelia never shied away from confrontation; she looked him in the eyes when she told him she hated him, she looked him in the eyes when she told him she loved him, when they discussed all the heavy situations, she never shied away. Emilia did.

"Of course, I did," he admitted. He looked at her, but she wouldn't look up. "I just... when I found Amelia in the other world... I'm Fated to her. You know what the feelings are like; you're Fated to Owain, you get the feelings, the emotions, the pulls."

"Until I found a way to get rid of it," she pointed out. He remembered it clearly. She didn't tell him how, and he assumed it was because it was illegal, but they both agreed to do it, so they didn't have to feel each other's emotions. While they stayed together, they were both sick of it. Or so she told him anyway.

"I know. Either way, that's what I felt. We just... I love her. That's all I can tell you. I've fallen for her, and I want to be with her. If I'm being perfectly honest, I think in a way my subconscious always knew it was her, and I found a way to proxy her until I found her," Joshua admitted.

"I was a stand-in for myself," Emilia joked. She was still staring into her mug, and he knew it was because she was upset.

"I'm sorry," he said. He meant it; he never said anything he didn't mean.

"Thank you for being honest," she whispered.

"So... Josh?"

She smirked and finally looked up from her drink. Joshua made a mental note: only when the conversation wasn't awkward and upsetting for her did she look up. Only when she was talking about herself did she look up.

"It started because I assumed he was you. But eventually, he told me. I took a day or two to sort of get my head around it, and I realised the differences. Everything fell into place. But I realised the days when he was here were my favourite ones. I love him more than you, honestly. I think I have more chemistry with him."

Joshua laughed. "I have more chemistry with her. Funny old world... or multiple worlds."

She chuckled and finally met his gaze. Once upon a time, just looking at her would make him aroused, just being near her would make him want to rush her into the bedroom, or the office, but he didn't even want to be near her. Joshua realised that she might look the same, she might have the same name, the same a lot of things, but she wasn't the same. She was someone different, with just a few things the same.

"I guess we better try and work out how this Declaration works. If I remember rightly, Josh wrote you a bunch of ideas and a note," she said. "I'm glad you found your Fated One, though."

He smiled as she stood from the chair. They shared a quick mutual look of acceptance before she went upstairs and turned the shower on.

He touched his Knot. Though it was good for him to sort his life out piece by piece, he felt a string slowly being pulled in his chest. He missed her. It physically pulled at his mind to have it so empty of her in every way. Her thoughts weren't around him; her emotions weren't constantly changing in his veins; he couldn't connect to her in any other way.

The familiar peace surrounded him like a duvet being pulled over in winter as she touched her Knot in response. He knew she knew what was going on, but it annoyed him he spent their last moments not telling her about the limitations; though he assumed she knew. He didn't regret spending their last night lying beside each other as they should be for the rest of their lives.

He finished his coffee and put the mug in the sink as he heard the shower turn off.

Part of him wanted to slip up the stairs, hold Emilia and then use her body. He could take her from behind, pretend she was Amelia and get his arousal out of the way. But he couldn't. He thought of Amelia, and realised Emilia wasn't Amelia. To him, it would have been cheating.

He decided he needed to get it together. He was apart from Amelia, and he needed to change that fact rather than stand around and mope about it.

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There were three hand-scrawled notes in the pile, each one discussed the Declaration.

'So, if the Declaration hasn't worked, I was thinking about 11pm each night in our respective place, starting from when we go through the Change, we Declare into the mirror. It could work. I've been researching other shit too.'

Joshua had to hand it to him; though Amelia was right, and he came across as an arrogant arsehole, he was smart. Maybe the two went hand-in-hand? He wasn't sure.

The next one was what worried him: 'So I met up with your friend Christian. He knew immediately that I wasn't you. Anyway, he suggested doing another Declaration idea. I told him how I'd thought up the at the same time thing in the mirror. He said it could work. He suggested sacrificing something here that's important to you. Not like a human sacrifice, but like say a relationship or a job, that kind of thing. For me, it'll be quitting my job and PhD. So, I'll be doing that when the Change happens, so you really will need to look for a new job! But I'll do that and then say into a mirror how I've sacrificed the two things that are most important to me here so I can be in the other world for good. If you work out yours, do that and then try speaking it into a mirror or something. Sounds like it might be worth it.'

Joshua widened his eyes. It sounded simple enough.

He glanced around the bedroom. He could quit his job, but he didn't care enough about it. He guessed the most important thing to him in his home-world was his relationship with Emilia. But he had sacrificed that, in a way. She knew he was with Amelia.

But he guessed they hadn't broken up. Not properly.

That was the only important thing to him there; he didn't care about anything else. Even before he met Amelia in the other world, he never felt like he belonged anywhere because he knew there was something else out there for him. He got by before he was even a Drifter, getting by with a just-above minimum wage job, put up with being rejected by his Fated One there, he just didn't care. If he gave up Emilia properly, it might just be what both Joshua's needed.

He read the final piece of paper: 'Dude, I also realised, on your tattoo, should be a little D mark, it sort of looks like a burn. Christian told me about it the other day. It looks like a scar and it's really subtle, you'd probably have to feel it out. But he said he'd done some research and apparently whenever the Declaration works, it'll disappear completely. I found mine easily enough. Just a thought.'

Joshua sighed; if he put his hand on his Knot, he would set off Amelia, but he supposed she wouldn't mind. For him, he loved being able to connect to her when he couldn't see her. He assumed she felt the same, which is why they spent the evening and night together before he left.

His eyes ghosted over his tattoo, and if he strained his eyes ever so hard enough, he could just about see a D etched into his skin, almost like a burn that scarred. He braced himself and ran his finger over the Knot. He felt it almost immediately when he touched the bit he'd seen. A small, raised part of the skin that was so subtle he wasn't surprised he'd never noticed it before. It was a D in shape, but it was definitely there.

The stress melted a second later. Amelia.

He grinned to himself. His memory bank filled him with thoughts about her; her smile, her lips, her naked body pressed against his in various positions, the feel of her fingers entwined with his.

Joshua sighed and went down the stairs. He knew he had to face this eventually. If the sacrifice thing was true, he had better face it while it was fresh on his mind. Emilia was clattering about in the kitchen, washing up, making breakfast, making more coffee.

She was comfortable, and for a second, he stared at her in amazement from the back: she could've been Amelia. If he was watching her from the other world, his heart would be bursting with pride, happiness, and excitement. But she wasn't Amelia, he was watching Emilia, and there was a large difference.

"I hope you don't mind, I decided to make pancakes. I'm hungry, and I guess, like, you wouldn't have minded." She stared at him, and his fantasy was ruined.

He shook his head. "No, go ahead. Look, I... so, Josh left me a note with a couple of ideas of how to make the Declaration work. One of them was to sacrifice something here that's important to me, and obviously for him in his home-world."

She placed the frying pan in the sink, turned the hob off, and dished up the two plates of pancakes with bacon on the kitchen table.

He waited until she was seated and eating before he approached the subject. He took a mouthful of the pancakes, a bit of bacon and maple syrup. He gave her the mental note; she was a good cook and always had been. He wondered if he could rustle it up for Amelia if he ever got to wake up beside her. Then he remembered that if the universe ever did give him a chance to wake up beside her in the morning, he would rather enjoy the taste of her lips rather than pancakes.

He just wanted her.

"I can already predict how this conversation is going to go," Emilia spoke up. "You're going to tell me that we are over because I'm the most important thing to you here?"

He nodded and ate another bite of the crispy bacon against the fluffy pancake and sticky syrup. It tasted so good, but the way her expression soured like gone off milk made the food taste bitter in his mouth.

"Pretty much," he said.

She hummed in response, drank a bit of her coffee before regarding him, "Makes sense. I mean, you've never really been happy, have you? At least not since I assume you started Drifting. From what Josh was saying, it's been going on for a year or two now. You haven't been that happy in life in general since I've known you, anyway."

"I didn't realise until I met her," Joshua admitted.

She nodded at him. "I suppose if she's your Fated One, it's natural. So... I'm gonna finish breakfast, grab my stuff. Then all I ask is one more kiss, as a goodbye. To me, no matter that I've fallen for Josh, you're still my Joshua. I'll even hand in my notice if you want."

"You don't have to leave your job, Emilia, that's not fair."

She smiled and ate her food in silence.

Though he couldn't taste the food as it should've been, he continued because it was something to stop him from talking. Awkwardness was always his fear, it always made him cringe. This situation was one of the worst moments for it. He didn't feel bad because it had to happen eventually: he loved Amelia. But it didn't make it any less awkward. The only thought keeping him on the right track was that it was Emilia and not his Amelia that was broken-hearted right now.

Twenty silent minutes, one single peck on the lips later, and Emilia was gone. It was an uneventful finish, just like a lot of things in his life had until he met Amelia. He stared into the mirror in his lounge and sighed.

"I Declare that I wish to stay in the other world; the world where I was not born, but the world where my Fated One is. I have sacrificed the one important thing to me in this world, and I Declare myself to my other world."

He stared at himself as he said it, not breaking any eye contact so he could Declare to himself, and no one else.

He thought of Amelia as he said it. He hoped to everything he had that it would work.

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