November 25th 2015

Damian

Noah was getting out of the Hospital today. The doctors made him spend a few nights there so they could monitor him. This was since he had been brought into the emergency room, twice for severe conditions, in such a short period of time.

I wanted to be there with him, but instead I'm here sitting at home. "Do you want a can of coke or sprite" Chad yells from the kitchen.

"Coke" I yell back.

Now before you go jumping at conclusions. I really did want to be there for Noah, by his side. However, he asked me to do this. He wanted me to be here with Chad. Why: I don't know. He just requested me to have him here, comfortable and not suspecting anything.

Noah was having Kate drive him here, with Ash, Alec, Jaxon and Lexi. I have no clue why or what's going on, no one does other than Ash. But we are all here (or going to be here) to support Noah.

I saw him yesterday, he seemed anxious and excited for confronting Chad. So I wasn't going to let him down. I've spent the entire morning playing video games and shooting hoops with Chad. Faking smiles and pretending everything is alright. Just like Noah asked, he wasn't suspecting anything.

He returns and we resume the movie we were watching. Moments later the front door opens; "Honey, I'm home" Jaxon sings from the hallway.

"Urh, hurry up and get in here"Chad laughs.

"I'm coming, I'm coming. Sheesh" Jaxon says as he saunters through the door. Followed by Lexi, Ash, Alec, Kate and finally Noah. I watch as Chad inspects each of them in turn silently.

Finally his eyes land on Noah, "What are you doing here?" Chad snarls, furious.

"I'm here to talk to you, in no man's land, otherwise known as Damian's house." Noah says matter of factly. He is acting strong, but I can see him fidgeting with his shirt sleeve.

"It was you who put me in the hospital all those weeks ago. It was because of you that I was in a coma and could have potentially died". Noah says and there is a collective gasp. "Yet you didn't intend for that did you?" He says lowering his tone.

"I thought you couldn't remember anything" Chad says quietly.

"I didn't up until I nearly got into an argument with Damian in the hospital. Then it all came back. Ironic, huh? It came back to me when I was back in hospital"

"I didn't put you in there a second time" Chad begins to say in defence of himself.

"I know you didn't and that's not why I'm here to talk to you" With that Noah releases a tired sigh and heads to a seat to sit down. Alec goes to support him and help him down, but I get in there first. I am holding Noah's hand and sitting next to him all the while Alec glares at me. I really need to sort out the tension between me and the guy I looked up to as a brother my whole life.

"Roderick Clarke- your father right?" Noah asks.

"What relevance does this have?" I whisper into Noah's ear. He just shakes me off.

"Yeah, he's my dad" Chad says as realisation starts to take form in his eyes. " You remember it all, don't you?"

"Yeah I do, I remember every detail from that day. It came back to me like a tsunami. Slow at first then a full blown crash of a wave. I remember the phone call I got in the morning. I remember going to Ash for advice. I remember spending the day on edge. I remember Kate pestering me to let her in on what was bothering me. I remember coming home that day."

"So you remember what happens next" Chad deadpans as a small smile creeps onto his face. The smile isn't malicious or sadistic yet it bothers me. But to my surprise Noah returns it.

"Yeah, I do" Noah says, " I don't hate you by the way."

Chad chuckles lightly. "That's a relief, brother"

"What the fuck is going on? I don't get these riddles you're speaking in" Jaxon huffs in annoyance. He is speaking what I think is on everyone's mind except maybe Ash.

Noah turns to him and laughs "Well maybe I should elaborate"

"No shit Sherlock" Jaxon responds as he sits back in his chair getting comfortable.

"I received a phone call that morning from my mother. Someone I hadn't heard word from in a year and half. She said she was coming to see me after school. I was petrified, but I decided that I should see her alone at my house. You can imagine my surprise when I walked into the door and the first face I saw was Chad."

"In my defence I didn't know it was your house. Or that I was waiting for you either" Chad butts in.

"So why was Chad in your house? Weren't you expecting your mom?" Jaxon inquires.

Noah laughs again "She was there too and so was Richard- Chad's dad."

"What neither of us knew at the time, was that when my dad left my mum, three years ago, he moved down South. To Texas to be exact. Down there he met Jenna, Noah's mom. She was stuck in a terrible marriage, and unhappy. Whilst my dad was recovering from his own bad marriage, they met. They hit it off, fast forward a little while and Jenna is leaving Noah's dad for my dad." Chad continues the story.

"My mother, Jenna, left me with my dad and took off without word. She sent the divorce papers shortly after and my dad begrudgingly signed them. Soon later we had picked up and moved here for what my dad called a 'fresh start'. For a while it was the fresh start we both needed and wanted."

"But it turned bad- blah blah blah" Chad butts in again- whilst Noah shoots him an annoyed stare.

"My mother returned here to tell me that she was marrying Richard. Neither me nor Chad had known anything about this before they planted this bombshell on us." Noah says.

"Noah storms off to his room to come to terms with it on his own. I couldn't stand being left with the man who left me and his fiancee so I marched out too. Not knowing where to go, I go upstairs to find Noah." Chad informs us.

"Chad comes banging on my door. I open it up for him and start yelling at him. He says it's not his fault, I get mad at him more for that. I bring up the whole Damian situation and he says it's not his fault that Damian's not into me. I start laughing at the fact we are finally becoming somewhat friends in such strange circumstances and Chad agrees it's hilarious. We start talking then Chad offers to help me. I say 'what for' and he replies 'to get over being gay'. I get pissed at him and start pushing him out the door. He pushes me back. So I push him harder. Then he pushes me back with so much force I trip over my own feet and fall down the stairs." Noah says giving us a brief rendition of the story. Somewhere along the line, he lets go of my hand and begins to stare at Chad. There is no malice in his stare. He just examines Chad.

Chad lowers his eyes, "I was actually looking forward to having a brother" Chad mumbles.

"I am too" Noah says which causes everyone to gasp. Chad looks up at him- shocked.

"You are?" Chad asks. "Like seriously, even after all the crap I did to you?"

"I get it you know, how you feel. I thought you were a bully because you wanted to be. However, I understand you weren't lashing out on me because I was with Damian or whatever you were lashing out on me because I had disappointed you"

"What are you even going on about?" Chad fails to laugh off.

"That you wanted someone to turn to. For the first time I was that, but I got mad at you and I lashed out at you. For that I am sorry. I gave you hope then took it away. I know how that feels, i've had that happened enough to me to know. I would still like for us to be brothers."

"I would like that too" Chad smiles.

"Are you serious, but you hate gays- Noah is gay remember?" Jaxon yells equally as astonished as I am.

"That is true and that will never change. Chad doesn't have to understand it or like it. However if he can accept me and whoever I chose to date. Then I see no problem with it. If Chad were to be gay or bi I would show him the same courtesy." Noah responds politely. The Noah standing in front of us isn't the same boy I joked around with before. But the guy I've seen glimpses of over the months, the one who has had to survive through years of abuse. The one who has had to learn to grow up on his own. The one who writes poetry as an escape and believes in a better life. This is the Noah I fell in love with.

"I can try" Chad says solemnly.

"Good" Alec says "I hope you do try, because if you hurt Noah, especially over something he can't change- I swear I'll kill you." I hear both Noah and Chad gulp at that. Noah is staring at Alec appreciatively and Alec sends him a loving smile in return. A pang of jealousy shoots through me. It's Lexi of all people who sends me an apologetic look for she is the only one here paying any attention to my feelings.

"Am I missing something here?" Jaxon asks, pointing between the looks Alec and Noah are shooting each other. Kate nudges him in the ribs and for the first time I ever, I witness Jaxon, listen to someone- to shut up.

"So what now?" Chad asks, trying to getting rid of the weird tension in the air.

"I'd like to get to know my new brother" Noah says turning his affection towards Chad.

"I'd like that too" Chad smiles.

"You know, our parents thought we would be happy, since our step brother went to the same school as us, I wasn't sure if I was until now. They thought they could move here to be close to us after the wedding." Noah finally says. "I'm not sure if that would be half bad either anymore".

"Are you of anything Noah?" Chad jokes.

"I want to salvage my family, or at least try to have a family now" Noah says matter-of-factly.

"I'm your family" I whisper to Noah. Though I don't know if he hears me, since he makes no comment on it.

"So, what? You want to see your mother and soon to be step-father?" Chad scoffs. "I doubt that would go well."

"Why not?" Noah frowns.

"I think he is just concerned that it will cause you more harm than help" Kate responds in attempt to calm the growing antsy Noah.

"Are you sure that you want to salvage that. Somethings are best left as they are." Alec reasons. Those were similar words he told me once, I listened to him. I thought those words saved me and in a way they did. They let me find a comfortable balance that I could live with. However, I stopped living then - I lost my family then- I lost my home then. I am about to voice those words but the conversation moves on.

"Alec is right mate, somethings are best left unsaid and untouch. That bitch left you man, leave her in the past." Jaxon chimes in but Kate nudges him in the stomach with that.

"That 'bitch' is Noah's mother. Show some respect!" Kate reprimands Jaxon.

"S-sorry" Jaxon solemnly apologises. Noah just nods in response, lost in thought.

Noah is silent for a few moments. "Let me see her, let me see both of them" Noah says in a strangely confident tone.

"Let the boy see his mother and her boy toy he has every right to" Ash speaks for the first time in a domineering tone of voice. With that he heads for the door and leaves. Noah quickly scampering to follow him.

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