Surprised would be an understatement of the emotion I was feeling when I got that message from Ryder and nervous would be an understatement of how I'm feeling right now.

Obviously when I got the message from Ryder, I said yes to meeting up. We decided we'd meet at a local park because sitting across from each other at a public place while people watch us have a awkward conversation didn't sound like my cup of tea.

The parking lot was empty except for Ryders car when I got there at nine. I grabbed my phone and keys and walked towards the park. "Hey" I quietly say, sitting on a swing beside him

"Hey" he says putting his hands in his hoodie pocket for warmth. He's wearing the same grey shorts as earlier and he's put on a black hoodie. I opted for the same outfit as earlier because I didn't miss his 'subtle' checking me out.

"How's your eye?" I ask avoiding eye contact

"It's seen better day's" he jokes

"You really shouldn't have gave in to him" I cross my arms "he wanted you to hit him"

Ryder shrugs looking at me "he deserved it"

"But you didn't deserve to get in trouble because of him"

"I don't care about trouble Tal, I wasn't about to let him talk shit about you and our baby"

We both stare at each other for a few seconds without either of us saying anything. Ryder coughs awkwardly and looks away "you've been at the gym a lot" he states rather than questions and his tone of voice suggests he's not just saying it as a conversation starter

"You quit your job" I do the same to him

He laughs to himself "you're not supposed to be true one doing the interrogating"

I shrug "I wouldn't be if you hadn't quit your job and disappeared off the face of the earth"

"Didn't you do the same thing?"

I roll my eyes

"You got a tattoo?" Ryder notices my wrist

I nod and hold out my wrist which he wraps his fingers around, and runs them over the angel wings "it's beautiful"

"Thank you" I say and take my arm out of my jumper to show him the butterfly one on my arm "you probably don't remember now but I told you I wanted a butterfly tattoo at-"

"The boat party" Ryder finishes, surprising me that he even remembers

Ryder once again runs his fingers over it. I gulp half because of the feeling he's giving me the other half because of what I'm about to say next "I never told you why I wanted it though" Ryder doesn't say anything instead his fingers continue to trace the tattoo. I use my free hand to pinch a bit of skin, a habit I picked up over the years as a coping mechanism "my dad used to hit me"

Ryders hand immediately freezes but I don't look at him while I continue "it started when I was ten, what triggered it no one really knows, maybe it was the drinking. He used to say that if I cried he'd hit me harder next time and if I told anyone he'd hit Em too" I finally build up the courage to look at him, his face is a mix of anger and softness "it took me over five years to tell someone"

Ryder does what I want him to do, instead of saying hundreds of things that wouldn't change what happened he interlaces our fingers

He lets out a breath "your probably wondering why my mom hates me so much" he says while his thumb subconsciously caresses my hand "I was thirteen when my dad was bringing me home from a birthday party" he looks down and I can see him swallow "we got in a car accident on the way back and dad didn't make it" I can hear the sadness in his voice so I give his hand a reassuring squeeze "my moms blamed me ever since. She always says if you weren't such a fuckboy you'd never have been at that party and dad wouldn't be gone" he tries to lighten the mood with a laugh "ironic seen as I was thirteen and hadn't even had my first kiss"

He looks at me with sad eyes "she acts like she was the only one affected when he died, like I hadn't just lost the person I looked up to the most"

I move toward him and wrap my arms around his torso. After a second Ryder drapes his over my shoulders and rests his chin on the top of my head. We don't say anything for a few minutes before he speaks again "can we be friends again now?"

I nod

_______________

It's been a few days since Ryder and I started talking again. Somehow our conversation the other night gave both of us the closure we needed over our baby.

"Hey" Molly says opening the door to her house

"Hi" I say walking in and throwing my bags on the ground "you ready for your first date?" I grin

She rolls her eyes with a grin on her face "it's not a date, if it was a date you and Ryder wouldn't be going"

"Oh whatever" I grin "we'll just pretend we're not there just for moral support"

We go up to her room to get ready. She turns to me with a cheeky smile on her face "that would also mean you and Ryder are on a date. Am I wrong?"

It's my turn to roll my eyes "that's a whole different story and you know it"

Molly gives me a smirk "is that denial I smell"

Less than an hour later we're both ready to leave. Molly opted on a leather jacket and skirt which she paired with a black T-shirt

I decided on a more girly route with a blue stop which I tucked into a white skirt with a light blue denim jacket. My hairs left in loose curls and my makeup is natural glam.

When we get to the movies Ryder and Sean are standing outside with popcorn and cotton candy in their hands. Molly walks straight over to Sean once she gets out of the car while Ryder and I slowly stroll towards each other

"You think these two will be able to keep up the act?" Ryder asks with a smirk on his face

I shake my head my smirk mirroring his "I give them until half way through the movie"

"It's horror by the way"

I pout "I hate horror"

Ryder grins and wraps his arm over my shoulder pulling me into him "don't worry babe, you can always hold onto me when you get scared"