Atlanta, Georgia

1:19 PM

December 24, Saturday

I stood in Scarr's store with 30 and everybody else listening to them as they joked around.

Something was telling me to just spare off on this bitch ass nigga but something else was telling me that it wasn't worth it.

"You good?"Bk asked me and I just nodded.

Ion see how 30 could just continue to laugh with and be in this nigga face after what he did.

I'm trying not to let my emotions and feelings get the best of me because then I start thinking well what if he did some shit like that too.

Ion know though I think both of 'em should catch these fucking hands.

"Okay I'm back."I heard Kodi say as she walked back into the store.

See I'm not even gone sit here and act like I agree with her staying with this bum ass nigga because I don't.

However, it is not my marriage or my relationship and I can't choose for her rather she stays or leaves.

Im just gone take it as they figured it all out but since I know she didn't do anything about it, ima beat his ass my damn self.

"So what design are you thinking of?"I asked Scarr as I stood next to him.

"Shit ion even know to be honest. At first I was thinking about going with something along the line of Super Mario or some Comic Book type shit"he said and I nodded.

"Are you talking about the font of the letters?"

"Yea that's exactly what I'm talking about baby."

I nodded as I looked at Natasha who stood next to me.

"Hi best friend."I smiled at her and she smiled back.

"What if y'all just mix it all up?"she asked us.

I looked to Scarr for an answer and he just shrugged.

Natasha tapped me arm for me to move and I stepped back.

As soon as I did so she started punching on Scarr.

"Bitch you cheated on my best friend and you know she's fucking sick!!!"she yelled while continuing to beat his ass until 30 came up and grabbed her.

"Man what the fuck is you doing!?"he yelled at her.

Scarr looked at me while wiping the blood from his mouth that was leaking.

I just blankly looked back at him before putting my head down.

When he walked outside to smoke and it was over, I went with him.

"Bro I apologize for that, I had no idea that her crazy ass was gonna do that shit."30 said what walking out here.

"Nah it's cool brother."Scarr said to him.

30 nodded before going inside.

"Are you okay?"I asked Scarr.

He glared at me before looking away and hitting his blunt.

"You just gone let her put her hands on me like that!!?"

"What you mean!? She had a very good reason for putting her hands on you! You forgot!? You cheated on me while I was at my lowest!! Did she not just sum it all up or riddle it to you!? I still have the chance to beat your ass but I'm not gonna do it because why stress myself out over your low down dirty ass!? You know what I can't talk about this, im going home."I said while going to grab my stuff.

Once I had my things I got in the car and before I could get settled and pull off, I broke down.

I felt someone hugging me after a minute or two and that's when I noticed it was Natasha.

"Tasha he's not sorry, he doesn't even fucking remember!!! Not only did that fuck me up mentally and emotionally but it fucked me up physically. I had to spend plenty of nights in the hospital after all of that shit because I was so stressed. It's just like he's saying, 'I did it and so what it's over now'." I'm trying so hard Natasha, I'm trying so hard to forgive him but I just ca- I can't! And- and I- and I want to because he's my husband and I love him to death but it's so hard!!"I cried.

"Natasha I wanted another baby— I know I already told you this before but I just- I want to tell you again."

"No tell me best friend that's what I'm hear for, to listen and so that I can beat his ass again every time I see him."

"I wanted another baby before he went to New York or wherever he went and the news came out. We were preparing to have another baby before it was too late since I am sick. The doctor told us that since I have lupus that there was a possibility that the baby could develop it later on in its life. And that I could have some complications during my pregnancy, so we were already preparing for this. Then he left and went wherever he went and then the news came out, it's like- it's like he just forgot about us and our family. Our kids had to see their mother get put on a stretcher plenty of times because of—because of this and he doesn't care. Natasha, he doesn't fucking care!!"

"I'm sorry best friend, I'm so sorry that all of this had to happen."Natasha said while rubbing my back as we hugged.

"It's not your fault Natasha, it's not your fault. It's my fault, it's all my fault. If I just weren't so ugly then maybe this shit wouldn't have happened. If I just would've taken care of myself as I should've then we wouldn't be in this situation right now!!"

"Kodi no!! Don't you fucking say that. He might not see it but you are very beautiful on the inside out outside. Regardless of your disease, you're absolutely fabul—"she cried and I cut her off.

"No Tasha you're just saying that shit to make me feel better about myself, you don't believe that!!"

"Kodi yes I do. When I look at you I still see the same beautiful woman who I met back in Houston years ago. I still see the same beautiful woman who got married to that piece of shit standing out there!! Kodi believe it or not you're beautiful on the inside and out, and that's what makes you a bad bitch. It's not only about what you look like on the outside but who you are within, and I'd have to say you're a damn good individual Kodi. Most bitches can't even be beautiful on the inside and outside. So don't put yourself down over that lame ass nigga just because he can't see it."

"Natasha he's my husband though, I want him to see it!!! Why can't he see me Natasha!!!?"

"I know, I know baby. You can't waste your time on him though, you have to realize that there's other people who see the beauty inside and outside of you. Kodi you don't need him and I know you may feel like you do because he's still your husband but you don't. You don't need someone that cheated on you duri—"

"Okay stop Natasha stop!!!"I cried while shaking my head no.

I couldn't take anymore of this conversation and I did not want to hear the shit all over again.

After I finished up talking with Tasha, she left and went to my house with me.