[WARNING: Some violence in this chapter. Don't read if you are triggered by abuse]

The whole ride there Lexi was bouncing up and down in the front seat, running her hand along Zach's thigh, switching stations, anything but sitting still. Because she insisted on sitting in the front seat to be closer to Zach while he was driving, that left Mason and I in the backseat together. It was as awkward as having to sit through sex ed. He would look at me and turn toward the window and then I would look at him and turn towards my window. It was like visual ping pong.

When Zach parked the car at Jimmy's I jumped out as quickly as possible. I didn't like the way he looked at me when we were alone and no other eyes were on us. It made me feel vulnerable and I don't like feeling that way. 

"Good luck." I said punching Mason in the arm. He looked at me for a brief moment with an intense look in his eye and opened his mouth to say something. He shook his head and just smiled instead. What is going on with that kid?

I made my way to the bar where Jim was and sat down to get comfortable.

"Hey Jimmy! How's life been treating you?" I said leaning my elbow on the bench trying to come across more relaxed than I felt.

"Pretty good li'l firecracker. Just put a deposit on an interior decorate for this old dump to spruce it up a bit. What about you?" He asked, his full attention on me. Something about him just made me feel like spilling my guts knowing I could confide in him, like a confessional.

"Not bad. I have to do a duet with Mason for class next week. I'm a little apprehensive about it though." Scratching the back of my neck.

"Why's that? He certainly speaks very highly of you."

"Really? He talks about me?" suddenly I'm embarrassed at my eagerness.

"Yes ma'am. I haven't seen him this way since... well come to think of it since his parents were still around." A tinge of sadness crept up to his eyes. My curiosity got the better of me so I had to ask.

"What happened to his parents?" I asked in a hushed voice. Jim leaned in slightly and looked around to make sure no one was listening.

"Both his parents died of cancer when he was 11. He got placed in the foster system and bounced around from family to family until he was 18. He's been emancipated ever since." I felt a pang in my chest for Mason.

"In between homes he came here and used to try and beg alcohol out of me, the little ratbag. Instead of giving him what he wanted I gave him what he needed. Food, a place to stay and a set of ears to listen, until he was placed with the next family." He purses his lips at the fond memory.

"But best not be sharing this with anyone though darlin', he's very particular with who he shares things with." He patted me on the shoulder and started preparing shot glasses for the night.

It's scary to think that Mason and I have something in common. We don't like to share our past with anyone. I look up at the stage where the band is setting up their equipment and my eyes fall on Mason on the floor plugging in electrical leads. I imagine him at 11 years old, all alone in the world with no one to love him or show him how to be a man. The pain in my chest starts again, forcing my eyes to water. Even though he's a player and a troublemaker, no one deserves a life like that.

He looks up at me and I pat my fingers underneath my eyes, willing the tears away. He starts moving his arms like a robot and then squirts imaginary oil into his armpit and elbow crook. I laughed and gave him a small thumbs up. My heart swells with warmth for him. I guess I can go and sit in the front with Lexi.

So I dodged all the scuffed tables and chairs as I made my way to the front table where Lexi was sitting with a tall glass of fluro green liquid in her hand.

"Oh yay, you're gonna be a groupie with me?" She said taking a sip of her drink through the tiny straw.

"Well I'm not gonna sleep with the band but I'll dance with you, sure." I said sitting down crossing my legs awkwardly, uncrossing them and settling on an ankle cross.

It only took 10 minutes before the tavern was basically overflowing with people. A lot of college students were there, hanging around the bar already ordering second rounds. Their shouting was incessant and annoying like spoilt little children. The floor was already sticky from a combination of mixed alcoholic drinks being spilt on the floor. Just as I was contemplating whether to move further away from the stage and away from the obnoxious people, the lights dimmed and the band began to play.

The instruments boomed through my body making me vibrate from the inside out. The feeling of loud music pounding through me made me feel alive and buzzed. I stayed seated, trying not to move my body to the music. It was almost as hard as trying not to breathe when you've held your breath for a long period of time.

Back at home I went through a time in my life where all I would do is dance. I even went and took the free hip hop classes my school offered instead of inter-school sports and loved every minute of it. My mother caught me practising in my room one time and shit hit the fan pretty quick. She arrived home from prayer group early one afternoon and stormed into my bedroom.

"What is this satanic music? How dare you listen to this in MY house!" and with that she picked up my stereo and threw it out of the window.

"If you keep up dancing like a whore of Babylon, Jesus won't forgive you. You'll burn in hell." She came right up to my face and held a fistful of my hair in her hands.

"The next time I catch you dancing, you WILL be punished." My scalp prickled with pain as stands of hair were being plucked slowly with her firm grip around my ponytail.

I winced at the memory of her 'punishments'. I looked at Lexi through my bangs and she looked back at me putting down her drink. She pulled me up from my seat and started dancing like she was trying to shake me loose.

"Hands in the air like you just don't care!" She cupped her hand over her mouth shouting over the music and pulled my hands up with hers.

I didn't want to be disrespectful to the band so I sung the lyrics, arms raised pointing to the band.

Mason pointed to me before the chorus and then sung the lyrics

I'll run away with your footsteps

I'll build a city that dreams for two

And if you lose yourself

I will find you

His eyes never left mine while he strummed his guitar, his white shirt making him stand out from the rest of the band. I felt that weird feeling in my chest again as the corners of his mouth began to upturn while his gaze was fixed on mine. He is everything my family would disapprove of. He plays the devils music, has marked his skin with tattoos, has promiscuous sex and who knows what else. As much as I felt drawn to him by some odd fatal attraction, it was either him or my family. I couldn't have both in my life. I'd disgraced my family too many times.

I tried to avert my attention to the others. Skeeter's hair glistened with sweat as he pounded his drumsticks into the drum skins. Zach and Tommy played off the energy of one another sticking their tongues out and roaming around stage. No matter how hard i tried, my yes kept drifting back over to Mason. The boys' set finished with women screaming their names and the men pumping their fists in the air barking. It was the most fun I'd had since I got kicked out of home.