Matthew was drunk in his uber.

Shocker.

"Thanks for the ride," I started curtly, keeping my distance in the backseat of the newer shadowy coupe that had pulled right up to the curb outside the studio.

The aroma of vodka, Matthew's choice poison, filtered through the air and got clogged up in my nostrils reminding me of the night that he'd first kissed me in the inky luster of the club's flashing lights.

I avoided peeking at him until I couldn't stand it anymore, rain pelting on the windows and fogging up the air around the windows until I could barely glimpse the streetlights lining the blacktop ahead.

His head was bowed, hair darkened by the rain and falling in a thick, messy array in front of his face. His hands were at his sides, carefully drawn and clenched, as if he couldn't bear the fact that we were alone in the back of the car together.

"Thought you were done with fighting."

His tone was biting, caustic, and caused the hair on my arms to stand at attention.

"I'm not fighting, just brushing up on some skills I've lost."

"Didn't Eli make you swear never to go back to that studio again?"

"Eli isn't my keeper. He can't control where I go and what I do anymore than he can dictate what you do."

His jaw clenched, his teeth clacking together as he opened his mouth to say something then promptly shut it back.

Silence followed, the slushing of tires over the rain slick roads the only sound penetrating the soft atmosphere inside the uber. The driver played soft classical music over the stereo system, hopefully drowning out our conversation.

"Why are you going back to doing this shit, anyway? What, your boyfriend dumps you, so you have more free time, is that it?"

I bit back a snorting laugh at Matthew's desire to bring up my single-ness.

"No, but I definitely have more energy to use on other activities, if that's what you're implying."

His full attention was on me after that.

"What had you been using that energy on before, then? Answering his calls and texting him back as soon as he messaged you? Going to the movies?"

"Matthew. What activities do couples normally do together that can take up someone's energy?" I asked suggestively and in a mocking tone. Hopefully, he got the gist.

A flicker of recognition flew across his features before he schooled them into a mask of indifference, forcing a laugh to bubble up in my throat.

"Did you honestly think I was still a..." I leaned forward and cupped my hands dramatically around my mouth before whispering the word, "virgin," and punctuating that statement with a laugh at the end of it.

If there was one thing in my life that I had a stellar relationship with, it was sex. Before the breakup, Ben had even allowed me to experiment with light bondage and role play, but with us, the sex was never the issue, it was the rest of the relationship that was lacking.

"God, Ellie, I really don't even want to think about that right now," he said with a grimace, an exasperation in his voice that he used to try and hide the groan that had been building up in his throat.

I had to admit, it was fun teasing Matthew about his preconceived notions about me and my 'purity', but in all honesty, it just drove home the idea that he only saw me as his little sister, and was disgusted about hearing about my sex life, even though he'd kissed me, twice.

That definitely didn't fit with the 'you're like a little sister to me' statement that he'd made, but there was something to the tortured way in which he was trying to keep his hands to himself in the back of the car, something to the way that even when he was looking away from me, his knees gravitated towards mine until they were almost touching, the ghost of an electrical impulse buzzing between the infinitesimal amount of space between us.

It was easy to slip into that mask of flirtatious and teasing Elodie, the girl who couldn't be bothered by the world around her and who didn't care that the only person she'd ever felt she shared her entire soul with didn't feel the same way about her.

That didn't hurt. Not at all. Not for the bold version of me, the version who pretended nothing got to her and pushed away her feelings of the past and her trauma until it was in a locked drawer in her mind and only certain triggers held the key to.

I was going to respond when a phone call from Dorian came through my phone.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Hey, I'm sorry I haven't checked up on you since your fall. How are you?"

"I'm fine, it was just a scratch. I need to go back up and grab my car but I don't know if I'll have time to ride because I move into school tomorrow. You moving in tomorrow, too, or are you on a different schedule?"

"No, tomorrow's my day, too. And your car is gone, someone said your brother had someone come and get it."

I snuck a look to Matthew who was fiddling with his phone.

"Did he now?"

"Uh, yeah, I think. Hey, let's meet up to eat lunch or something tomorrow on campus, we can compare schedules and figure out cool hang out spots."

"Sounds like a plan, see you tomorrow, Dory."

"See you tomorrow, Elephant."

I ended the phone call laughing only to look up and find that we were already pulling into the underground parking garage for our apartment complex. Matthew gave the driver the code to drive us up to the elevator entrance and tipped him with cash before he stepped out of the car after I did.

Cold and dank, the parking garage echoed the spin of the uber driver's tires as he drove away, leaving the two of us in silence, alone, waiting for an elevator that was notorious for taking forever.

"So. You and that kid you were on the phone with, you two going out now?"

I couldn't stop the short bark of laughter that followed Matthew's question.

"Dory? No, definitely not. I just got out of a relationship about a minute ago so I'm not trying to start anything up anytime soon, especially not with him. He's like my best friend, in guy form."

Matthew pondered my words while impatiently slamming the elevator button over and over again, almost willing the damn thing to show up on his command.

"Didn't seem like you weren't trying to start anything new the other night, with me, and then at the club...did you know it was me before you kissed me?"

"No. I found out it was you when that guy came back and I saw your face, but by then it was too late and I freaked and ran. And by the way, I wasn't looking to start anything then, either. That was strictly fun, trying to feel something other than what I was feeling then."

"Oh, so first you were happy to make out with a stranger but when it turned out to be me you just had to run away?"

"Well, technically-"

"Well if you're going to use someone like that, then it better be me."

"I-wait, what?"

"You heard me."

He came closer, pressing me back into the corner of the cement walls of the parking garage by the steel metal doors of the elevators that had yet to open.

There were notes of musky vanilla wafting off the black suit coat that clung to his muscular frame perfectly, whorls of fragrance trapped underneath the strong mix of rainwater and alcohol, but his words didn't slur and his movements weren't lazy or clumsy.

If it weren't for the telltale pinching scent of vodka lingering on his breath, I would've guessed that Matthew was stone cold sober as his green eyes darkened in the dim recessed lighting of the parking garage.

"You heard me. You want to feel something, do it with me, not someone else who could hurt you."

"You say that like you couldn't ever hurt me."

My neck had to crane almost all the way to the ceiling to meet his eyes dead on.

"Well I couldn't. I'm the one here who stands to be hurt, if you are going to be using me."

My head was spinning while I tried to keep up with his logic as his deep voice rattled my insides, but logic wasn't the one thing on Matthew Thornberry's mind, I was, and he was approaching me like a predator stalks his meal.

His body finally made contact with mine, his thigh brushing up against mine, chests squished together in the small space we'd inhabited in the corner, just out of sight of anyone wanting to catch the elevators up as well.

"You didn't have a problem with it before," he coaxed, voice smooth as silk and dripping down over me like honey and sin.

My mouth opened to object, but nothing came out. Wasn't this exactly what I had wanted, to have Matthew all to myself?

Instead, Matthew took my speechlessness as an opening and angled my face closer to his with one hand on the bottom of my jaw, pulling me in impossibly close as the sound of the elevator arriving finally pinged through the echoing lot.

"That's our ride, unless you don't meet the height requirement."

I fully caught his innuendo even as I was thinking of something similar in my head.

"I'm definitely tall enough to ride this ride."

Desire caught in his olive darkened eyes.

He took me by the hand and led me into the elevator, but I had him crushed up against the back wall before the doors ever had a chance to close.